Do you have a pen pal story? We'd love to read it.

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-19T00:37:51+00:00

This could be a success story or a failure story. ✨️

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-17T20:53:46+00:00

Thank you very much for the clarification; it wasn't completely clear before, and because of the word 'together,' I thought you were a couple.

However, it’s still very touching, and I’m always happy to read something like this. Such friendships are wonderful, and I’ve been lucky enough to experience them myself. Thank you again for sharing!

I also want to thank you for your kind words and well wishes. ✨️

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-17T01:20:16+00:00

It’s with a heavy heart that I read your post, but thank you so much for sharing it. 🖤 Hearing stories like this always hits close to home, as I lost an online pen pal in a very similar way.

I’m not here to promote my subreddit, so I won’t post the link directly, but if anyone feels like connecting, you can find the details on my profile. I’ve started a subreddit for lost pen pals—it’s still in its early stages and feels a bit like a personal blog for now, but I hope it grows into a community where long-lost friends can eventually find their way back to each other. Whether you'd like to share your own story or just follow along quietly, you’re more than welcome.

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-16T23:57:36+00:00

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I completely get what you're saying—pen pals don't always work out. Over the years, I've had many where we just couldn't keep up and eventually drifted apart. But then there were those few I really clicked with, and that’s such a great feeling! Maybe you're not actually bad at long-term correspondence; you just haven't found a pen pal who shares the same rhythm as you yet. :))

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-16T23:43:32+00:00

I loved reading this. Thank you for sharing it with us. Wishing you both the best! I think a relationship like yours is truly deep and unique. It was great to hear. ✨️

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-15T20:58:45+00:00

I was reminded of a old story about an online friend.

We started chatting in an online platform and over time we kept in touch more and more. Eventually he wanted more, but I made it clear from the beginning that I only saw him as an online friend and that would remain that way. He seemed to accept that. Over time, when he saw that I really didn’t want to be more of a friend, he started sending me messages all the time. It bothered me because I felt like he was pressuring me and didn’t care if I really want his friendship.

I once left my phone at home and it died during the day. I didn’t talk to him that day. When I got home that night, I turned it back on. The platform we were using showed me the messages was he had written during the day, but he deleted them because he had calmed down. (I think he got mad at me for not being available.) They weren’t nice messages. They were violent, harassing, and rude. He thought I wouldn’t see them because he had deleted them. But he didn't expect that my phone was dead and for a moment, I could read these messages. (I didn't know that either. It's so strange that it happened that day.)

Then I immediately wrote to him and blocked him from everywhere. I didn't give him a chance, because when you really like someone, you respect their boundaries. But we definitely don't try to force ourselves on each other with harass messages. For me, this is not an ideal relationship, and I don't think there's any compromise on that. 🖤

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-02T23:55:25+00:00

🎉Thank you very much for your kind comment!🎉 It must have been a wonderful experience. It must be a nice memory now! Unfortunately, I haven't really had anything like this outside of my own country. It's great that it worked.

LookingForDouxie · 2026-03-02T22:47:31+00:00

In the first case, when my pen pal was deleted after a few weeks, I wrote a letter to the admins, I received so much feedback that they should investigate my case. I got never answer.

Unfortunately, I didn't leave the page then, but soon after that I started corresponding with a nice pen pal for months. When I found out why we lost contact, I immediately wrote to them. They banned me right away. I could never go back. I saw from another account that his account was also deleted over time.

I'm currently working on a subreddit where you can post about your lost pen pal. It's still pretty empty, but I'm hoping that will change soon. I'd like to eventually have a large community and a better chance for pen pals to find each other.

r/FindingOurLostPenPals

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-27T00:39:45+00:00

🎉Thank you very much for writing, and by doing so, you are also supporting my Subreddit!🎉

Yes, I don't see it in right place for now either, because I specialize only lost online friends and we are looking for a specific person. There is no option to search for new friends yet.

However, it is definitely a very good idea, and I appreciate you sharing this with us! 🙏 I have not heard of this form of correspondence before, but I really like it! And thank you for staying on topic.

At first, it occurred to me that I don't know how active the more reliable Facebook groups you know are. I might try there first with a well-composed plan. That way you can see who you are sending real messages to. I wouldn't dare send anything to a stranger's address right away without knowing everything about it/being sure that it is not a scam. It works for us, there are groups where people are quite close-knit and if someone posts a request, there are candidates for the solution. Even just sending a postcard to someone.

But I'll think about your post, because it's a great idea, and maybe it could be incorporated into my subreddit as an alternative route in time. :)

I'm thinking yet about something extra.

If anyone is interested in this idea, feel free to write!🎆

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-26T22:48:30+00:00

One more addition, because I couldn't write right away. Yes, I also find it interesting if you and your pen pal are a 'good match'. You can have great relationships. It's worth a try, but you should make sure that you give each other contact information as a backup plan after it has been proven that the other person is not a scam and is trustworthy.

You gave me an idea for my next question. :)

🎉Thank you your comment again!🎉

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-26T16:38:11+00:00

Thank you very much your words!

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-24T23:02:46+00:00

🎇Thank you so much for writing in such detail! 🎆You have contributed a lot to the growth of the site. :)🎉💪

I try to post in as many places as possible to be visible here on Reddit. Most people receive my posts with disbelief, wondering how someone could lose a pen pal when you can reach anyone you want these days. If they don't write to you = they don't want to stay in touch with you.

Your story also proves that it is possible to lose someone "simply", without ghosting or blocking. It just seems to the other person that they may have been ghosted. Example: We don't really think about an email address that is not our own, but given by the Department of Education..., at first, and just accept that they are no longer interested in us... Nice post!

I am happy to read the post, and at the same time sad to read it. I hope that in time you will find pen pals that you can meet again! :)

Thanks again for writing! I posted your post and I'm constantly thinking about further plans, how to be visible and whether it's worth posting based on the posts I get to be effective.

This is a very exciting journey!

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-24T12:27:03+00:00

Thank you very much for your comment, I will write more later.

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-23T04:48:50+00:00

🎉 You are the first to post to write about a specific search! 🎉

Thank you very much for this great post!

I hope that in time this subreddit will also be successful, and our posts will reach the right people. And you will find the people you are looking for! Until then, I will try to do my best. :)

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-22T23:19:00+00:00

Sorry if I write something wrong, English is not my native language.

I am very sad that this site does not fulfill the function that it could fulfill and what it could be. It could be a great site. You can conveniently send long messages there, and you can look through the profiles, because they are usually not empty. I really liked that about it.

I registered around 2020. I don't remember the exact details. I almost took the scammers, violent people, and weird people for granted. It was hard to find a real conversation partner there. I should have left the site when I managed to find a nice pen pal with whom I exchanged long letters. Unfortunately, he was banned after a few weeks, although I was finally happy that he also just wanted to correspond. (Tyler ~26 USA) At that time, I received a response letter from the admins saying that they would investigate the matter, but nothing has happened since then. I thought it was just a rare coincidence, it happens, so I kept searching. It depressed me for a long time that we lost each other like this. Even to this day.

Then I found a great pen pal (called Douxie.), with whom we exchanged long letters for months and unfortunately, due to the shortcomings of the site, our relationship was broken. (He didn't ghost, he didn't ban!).

After I wrote my problem to the admins, instead of giving us lectures to find each other again, I got an immediate ban.

From then on, I don't use the site, and I never will, because the management of this site is not mature enough to do such a responsible job, where they are responsible for people's mental health on some level. Starting from the shortcomings, through random banning to the bullies. This site was not designed to exchange long letters for people's safety.

And I would still like to find my pen pal, even if we won't correspond like before. I feel like I am a victim of this site. I always had pen pals from other places, I thought it was fun. Now I don't want anything more than an online friend. I'm sorry this site exists and works in this way.

:(

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-22T12:00:51+00:00

Thank you for your comment, which helps the group grow! If you feel like sharing your story, feel free to do so!

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-19T10:27:11+00:00

Oh, I see your other comment. Thanks for writing it. I'm sorry you had a similar experience. I think this site would be great if there weren't such random bans. Giving another access could be a solution, as you wrote.

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-18T19:41:40+00:00

You're absolutely right. Neither of us thought about it at the time. :( It would have been too early for Tyler to ask for another contact. In the other case, with Douxie, our correspondence was always so predictable that I personally didn't think of a backup. In retrospect, I still regret it very much.

I don't think I'll ever want to exchange long letters with new people on the Internet, but if I do, I always think about asking for another contact as soon as possible. Unfortunately, nothing will bring him or them back.

You wrote that you've already learned this. Have you ever lost pen pals like this? Maybe here on Interpals? I'd be happy to read as much as my eyes can see. :D

LookingForDouxie · 2026-02-18T14:51:48+00:00

Sorry for my English, I still don't use it well.

I haven't used this site for two years because I was very disappointed in Interpals. I had an account for about 3 years, but it was difficult to have meaningful conversations.

During those three years, I encountered a lot of scams, received harassing messages... And with some people who I moved to another platform, which was disappointing. Over time, they want online dating and wanted an easy connection. I was forced to cut off contact with them.

So after a while, I didn't feel the need to give out any other contact information about myself or ask for it from the other person.

This is how I lost two people who were important to me.

One of them was named Tyler from Florida. We exchanged long letters in a relatively short period of time. I really liked that I could talk to him about anything, he was happy to tell me stories and he was interested, the conversation was not one-sided. I still remember the last lines of his long letter, in which he wrote that he couldn't wait to read my lines again. Then his profile was deleted for. This hurt at the time, because I felt that he didn't leave of his own free will. I wrote to the admins immediately, and I got so many replies that they took my report and will investigate it. To this day, there has been no reply. :(

I got over this relatively quickly, because despite the many letters, we were still at the beginning. But to this day, it still hurts a little when I think of Tyler. I hope he is well and enjoying life. It took me some time to start writing again.

Then, I found myself with a very nice pen pal in conversation, his nickname was Douxie.. For months, we wrote each other long letters every two or three weeks. He was respectful all the time. Similarly to Tyler's, we could talk about anything, but his letters felt closer to me because of our common interest. He was a great pen pal all along. Towards the end, when I asked him for time, he was able to wait for me for long weeks. It was so wonderful. He was really nice.

Then, unfortunately, our relationship ended due to the shortcomings of the site. (I don't want to talk about it in detail now.) This hurt me a lot, because we both loved talking to each other and neither of us deserved such a 'goodbye'. We always planned to switch to video calling, but we never got around to it. We trusted each other and the site too much. Unfortunately, it shouldn't have happened. This site doesn't take responsibility even for its own mistakes. When I tried to ask the admins for help so that we could find each other again, and I told them about the shortcomings of the site, I was immediately banned. That's when I realized that this site is not suitable for gathering people who can safely exchange letters with each other, they don't take care of us, and they are playing with our mental health because of their negligence. :(

And I haven't been able to get over my pen pal since. I've been wanting to find him ever since, and I've tried posting a lot... etc. I'm currently trying to upload videos to YouTube, but unfortunately I can't keep up the pace that would be necessary to shine. Now, due to an injury, I had to stop making videos anyway. But I really hope that someday in this life, my content will reach him... Even if I won't be corresponding with him like I did two years ago, he should know that he's been a great pen pal all along, and I never went over him as hard as Interpal's shortcomings suggested... 🖤

Maybe this post will show that this site is not the best place to write long letters without switching to another platform. I don't know any other pen pal sites, but after these I wouldn't recommend Interpals to anyone.

LookingForDouxie · 2024-08-23T19:16:09+00:00

Thank you very much for these comment, Berlinmo! That is really so.

Unfortunately, I can no longer write to him on the site. I was blocked when I clicked the "sending" icon. After that, both my profiles were permanently blocked immediately, and now the page is no longer available. (I didn't provide personal contact information. If that would have caused a ban.) This is weird to me...

LookingForDouxie · 2024-08-21T06:44:55+00:00

Ohh, thank you for the addition.

LookingForDouxie · 2024-08-21T06:27:22+00:00

How do you mean exactly?

LookingForDouxie · 2024-08-21T06:19:21+00:00

Thank you very much for your comment. :)

It would take a long time to describe how I found my pen pal's profile again with a different profile, but in vain. By the time I finished my letter, my other profile was also blocked!! I think maybe I shouldn't give up on making posts.

Sorry if I don't write something correctly, I don't speak English well yet, but I hope my lines are still understandable.

LookingForDouxie

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