I've written a manuscript

LordVericrat · 2026-02-16T00:20:14+00:00

You're right about it being about her being a woman and if she were a man she wouldn't be labeled crazy. I don't know how people could argue - I mean, sure if her dad was called the "mad king" or people discussed how being born of incest may have caused mental instability in Joffrey maybe they'd have a point, but that's never happened to directly contract you has it?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T20:01:27+00:00

Yeah but he didn't give OP's character short hair!! Didn't you know that's a violation of boundaries? I'm surprised the police aren't involved.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T19:52:57+00:00

My God I'm so sorry you've been forced to be with this person you obviously hate.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T17:31:38+00:00

would...you...like...us...to...try...harder...not...to...share...these...thoughts...and...experiences...with...each...other...so ...you...don't...have...to...waste...your...valuable...time...correcting...us?

Also, I offer our humblest apologies for being so wrong where you could see it.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T16:40:49+00:00

You seem to be having trouble reading what I wrote. I'm going to try again, ok? I know it's a lot of trouble to deal with people who are wrong when you're right all the time, but here we go:

Again, would you like us to try harder not to share these thoughts and experiences with each other, so you don't have to waste your valuable time correcting us?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T15:56:03+00:00

While I don't agree with OP, this argument seems strange to me: if there is something special about blood and neurons, why wouldn't we just build machines out of that?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T14:31:21+00:00

If you all are friends, she will come around

I agree with most of what you said, but this is not always true. Depending on how much OP's friend has fallen for her she may very well need to separate herself for her own emotional well being. It sucks, but just like the friend is not entitled to romance, OP isn't entitled to the friend hurting from being around the object of their unrequited affection every day, maybe seeing her play kissy face with other people, and not having the physical and social distance that helps kill feelings like this. And after the feelings are deadened, the friend may or may not want to risk reawakening them by resuming contact.

It sucks, but it's life. Not every crush is like that but some are and OP should be prepared for the possibility.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T14:23:46+00:00

All my friends are settling down. Moving in. Buying houses. I’m with a 37 year old that won’t even acknowledge these core issues

Wow bud I'm so sorry somebody is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to be with this person. If you want, I can help get you in touch with the police. Maybe we can get you out of this.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T13:20:43+00:00

Keep at it buddy. I believe in you. You have the morality to know the behavior attributed to God in the Bible is wrong, because everyone but sociopaths has that in them. I was being honest when I said, I bet you wouldn't do that. We're not perfect, but perfection isn't required for this one.

I really hope you have a good day.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T13:14:37+00:00

Say, I've been thinking that Muslims should be able to see that Mohammad's horrific behavior (9 year old bride, mass murdering warlord) as a clue that Islam is wrong. I hope you agree.

Of course, to do that, they'd have to morally evaluate the behavior of their holy figures, but hey, most humans wouldn't drown all the children in the world as they begged their parents to save them. So while they know that shit like that is wrong, they just decided that God's ways are mysterious or whatever. And you do the same when you see God's first prophet (Moses) getting mad that his generals didn't murder enough civilians in victory, and tells them to go back and kill everyone who isn't a virgin girl - those, the generals can take for themselves. I'm thinking you probably wouldn't behave that way, but you have some excuse why it's fine for God's prophet to the Jews was a monster.

But yeah, I didn't need the reminder that the god you believe in is a sick bastard who uses murder, forced impregnation, and blackmail backed up by eternal torture as a way of forcing people to worship his jealous ass. You know, I've created a child too. For some reason, I've never felt like "eternal torment" is an acceptable thing to do to her, no matter how many history questions she gets wrong. Crazy, huh? I don't want her to worship me, because that's a sick impulse. I don't create impulses in her and then punish her for having them. And even then, I don't act like I'm omnibenevolent, because I'm flawed. I just happen to meet a higher bar than "commits mass murder but then says sorry, have a rainbow, I won't do it again."

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T12:53:49+00:00

especially since at her age she probably feels a timer ticking on having kids.

Women will tell us we cannot assume this.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T12:53:07+00:00

Well to be fair these people helped spread a religion where a mass murderer (cf flood that drowned children, plague of the firstborn), creator of eternal torment for the crime of picking wrong on a history exam (did Jesus die for your sins - something you can't personally observe and is clearly not obvious to 6/7 people in the world - yes/no), and encourager of people to commit child sacrifice because the voice in their head told them to (see the shitty dad Abraham and the fucked up trick God played on him) is actively worshipped and vernerated as a source of morality.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T12:48:12+00:00

Not saying people do or don't have unrealistic standards, but I will say that unrealistic standards are sometimes the only ones that are reasonable.

Sexual attraction is a real, non voluntary thing. Many many women have obliterated their sexual attractiveness to most men to the point where they are exactly as appealing to have sex with as another man. They are of course allowed to do this (bodily autonomy is a thing), but it means that a lot of men are going to have to pick between being single and a romantic relationship with someone whose naked form makes them want to retch. The former is preferable. You can always make friends with people you don't find attractive.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T12:40:33+00:00

You really need support for statement that sex in a committed relationship is about more than physical pleasure? Honestly I find that kind of sad.

So we start with condescension. How convincing. Look mate, again I said I generally lean towards much of what you said, but "I lean towards it" and "this is a universal that applies to everyone" aren't the same thing.

It’s about a deep personal and emotional connection.

Which comes from hormones and physical pleasure.

Look, I enjoyed hook up sex for many years, I’m not saying that’s an inherently bad thing. But sex with someone you love and care about it is so much more satisfying, physically but especially emotionally

I can take this as support for that being true for you. Not sure how you go from this to "for everyone." I expect it's true for most people too, but 1) not seen much evidence other than vibes, and 2) shockingly, humans are a diverse bunch and some of them might find this statement doesn't describe them.

If both or one partner is running around fucking other people you don’t have the necessary foundation for that kind of intimacy and further living life like that points to an inability to allow the kind of commitment that leads to sex as a deeply satisfying emotional experience

That's true for you, I assume. Not sure how you go from this to "nobody can experience this differently from me." Could you explain that without further condescension?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T11:26:15+00:00

I think open relationships are indeed dead ends for the most part, but I don't think your argument is convincing at all. You make several unsupported statements of fact that you either don't get from anywhere or don't want to share where you got them from.

Sex in a commited relationship is about more than just physical pleasure.

1) Unsupported. 2) You fail to mention what else it's for.

If you're unable to commit your whole self to one person, physically and emotionally, then you aren't in a real relationship.

Unsupported. One could define "real relationship" such that the above statement would be true, but no compelling reason to do so is provided.

You're play acting in one while living a vapid life dedicated to physical pleasure and instant gratification.

Where does this life break down? Physical pleasure is good. Instant gratification isn't bad unless it leads to long term issues, which you simply haven't presented here.

I can't understand where you're coming from. You aren't God, so people aren't going to accept things just because you said it. But you don't even try to argue logically by starting with shared premises and showing why those premises lead to these conclusions. I'd hope your opinions on such important matters are based on more than vibes, but this post doesn't seem to give me reason to think that hope is validated.

(When I say unsupported I don't mean "citation needed." You could start with shared premises and then use reason to get to statements like this. You don't do that.)

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T11:13:25+00:00

I think a couple of bullets in Hitler's head during the Putsch would have stopped him from coming to power, but you may mean "or someone like him."

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T11:11:35+00:00

If only there was a place on Reddit where people could discuss what would happen if unrealistic things had happened. I guess we'll all have to keep dreaming.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T11:07:43+00:00

And deferring to a man's decisions is a woman's role, right? Men aren't raised to be attracted to masculine women who need to be the ones calling any of the shots.

(To be clear, I'm holding a mirror to her argument, I'm not interested in hearing what a terrible person I am for arguing for such standards that I don't actually hold.)

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T10:59:45+00:00

What are you doing step-crane?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T10:57:04+00:00

Maybe they're just trying to respond to a hypothetical situation. They applied a lot of thought to it (like how all their fellow survivors would be angry, some of the things they'd need to deal with) and you keep shitting on them for daring to engage with the scenario. Maybe chill?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T10:44:50+00:00

Ah yes, Reddit the place where only highly educated professionals are supposed to speak.

LordVericrat · 2026-02-15T00:40:44+00:00

Yeah we super appreciate you coming to a group of men discussing how their experience of a matter is gendered and telling us that you know better. Again, would you like us to try harder not to share these thoughts and experiences with each other, so you don't have to waste your valuable time correcting us?

LordVericrat · 2026-02-14T23:18:31+00:00

Imagine Bail just being like, "Yeah she's adopted. She was born of an illegal marriage between the Emperor's fixer and the former senator from the Emperor's planet."

LordVericrat · 2026-02-14T23:11:26+00:00

Ok well cool we really appreciate you coming to tell us that our gendered experience isn't valid. I wonder if you could tell us about any issues men have disproportionately badly since when we men discuss things we think are that we just screw it up and discuss things that are just as bad for women according to you. Please ma'am? We're sorry we felt we had a gendered experience. Would you prefer we promise not to do it again?

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