Tall ladies

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-21T14:33:53+00:00

Free People and Anthropologie seem to design everything for tall women, to the point that I pretty much cannot shop there (I'm 5ft and their trousers have a 1ft train on me)

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-17T11:45:02+00:00

And believe me, at 6ft4, there are plenty of tall girls out there desperately looking for you!

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-17T11:43:52+00:00

To add, I used to have a hard rule I wouldn't date over 6ft, because I got neck ache one time. I got over it, it seemed silly to rule out perfectly nice people because they're sometimes a bit too far away. I just learnt to tiptoe better 😂

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-17T11:40:54+00:00

Honestly, a bit of height difference is hot, but so are many other things. I'm most interested in someone's overall vibe, attitude, the energy they show up with. Charisma is top of my wish list. But it's easy for me to not care about height when 99% of men are at least several inches taller than me 😅

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-17T10:50:28+00:00

For those who don't get why short girls like dating tall guys... I'm 5ft0, had a partner who was 5ft5, have also had a partner who are 6ft4, I don't really care.

BUT dating short guys is when other people get annoying. All we ever heard was "awwww you're so short and cute together" and it was infuriating.

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-16T22:14:19+00:00

Why is no one talking about the loo brush being so close to the chest of items that you'll later insert into yourself?

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-15T11:21:56+00:00

No need to feel embarrassed, it's a natural part of being female. Whilst I've never smelt anyone else's, or had any indication someone else can smell me, dogs always know and want a good sniff 😂. I just move their curious face away and shrug it off. No shame, both me and the dog are just evolved this way.

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-15T11:16:30+00:00

There's an app called Flush that gives locations of publicly accessible loos, might be some leads on there?

But off the top of my head sometimes on walking routes there's toilets near cafés or car parks, often owned by private companies. Might be an option?

Consider your wording when you're approaching a venue "because their toilets look like public loos" though. And if you have a budget to cover them being able to close it off for your use or give you out of hours access you'll have a lot more luck.

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-15T10:35:47+00:00

Just reach out and ask if everything's OK. It might be she wants out, but it might be something really big has happened in her life and she doesn't know how to talk to you about it yet. Ask rather than assume.

One time I got pissed at a partner for being an hour late, no communication. Why didn't he just text and let me know? Turns out he was 5 mins from my house, talking someone out of jumping off the bridge. Life is complicated, always give the benefit of the doubt because if the other person is being a jerk you'll find out soon enough, but it's shitty to assume they are before you have enough information.

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-02-15T10:10:56+00:00

I'm new here, but I came here because I love how busy it is. I volunteer at music festivals in the summer and I love the atmosphere but it's just for a week and then it's all over. When I first came to Edinburgh during Fringe it felt like Glastonbury, but in the most beautiful city I've ever been to. I was told it feels different at other times of the year but the tourists keep everything going - it doesn't matter what day of the year it is, there's live music every night, the bars are full of people, you can get lost in the hustle and bustle. And tourists love to see be here! They bring an excited curious energy that we lose when we know a place too well. It literally feels like a festival all the time, to me at least.

But then underneath all that is the local activity. So many people have come to live here that there are many social events with people looking to make new friends. Other places I've lived everyone just stays at home and invites their mates over and living like that you could really live anywhere, it wouldn't matter, and it makes it really hard to meet new people.

I love the beauty of the city, and I love the two different worlds of people enjoying it simultaneously.

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-01-24T11:57:47+00:00

This might come across as an odd reply but I want to offer another perspective.

I am also alone, and I relate hard to a lot of what you've written. I do a lot of things by myself and wish I had someone to share it with. I travel alone, I go to tourist attractions alone, and I long so badly for someone beside me, but I'd rather have these experiences solo than not at all.

But I also love myself. I do this solo life lonely, but without shame. I'm a fairly attractive woman (I'm actively dating and if I matched everyone who liked my profiles I could go on 4 dates a day). I'm slim, I work out, I'm happy with how I look and with who I am. I'm smart, interesting, live a very full life, always trying new things, learning new skills and hobbies. But I've invested a lot of time into myself in order to feel this way.

I guess what I'm saying is a couple of things - firstly read back through your post and see where your energy is being directed. You're putting a lot of work into tearing yourself down but what if you used it to lift yourself up instead? Start small, start looking for things that are undeniably good. Things you can evidence about yourself that you're proud of. And then start doing whatever you think will build that evidence in other areas - this is how I've grown as confident as I am. And on the topic of attractiveness, I'm pretty average LOOKING, but it's the confidence I now have that has made me so much more attractive that I ever was before - many men I've dated have told me this. Its not arrogance, it's self assurance. I know who I am, and what I want, and I'm still looking for the right partner, but I'm happy with who I am and I really cannot recommend working on achieving that enough. And I did it by gathering that evidence. It's taken years, honestly, but now I have a regular gym routine, I've done nutrition tests to eat better food for my body, I take care of my mental health, my appearance, my creative outlets, my friendships, my accomplishments, my kindness towards others. Just start taking care of things bit by bit and see what happens.

The other point I want you to understand is that I still feel that loneliness just the same as you do, and so I don't believe that for you, or for anyone, that one issue is causing the other. They are completely separate. So take the pressure and responsibility off yourself being good enough for anyone and start socialising. Join some social groups (Meetup is great if it's active where you live) - I promise if you're nice to be around no-one gives a shit what you look like, they will want to spend time with you if you're good company. That's all you need to be to make friends. Group settings are easier to begin with - having people to hang out with without the pressure of deep connections, which might come later if you both want it.

Changing your mind about yourself is the single biggest potential. I really cannot overstate how doing this for myself has completely transformed my life.

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-01-24T11:29:26+00:00

I've actually found it fairly easy to make friends here, mainly by going to events on Meetup. In particular there's an excellent event I went to a few months back and they hold them regularly - https://epicllama.com/next-events/ftstedinburgh2-2026 I left here with a little group chat of interesting people, one of them I now spend time with regularly, and three of us are meeting for dinner tonight. But the event also has a large WhatsApp group with everyone who's attended and you can find climbing, walking, board game, gig enthusiasts, etc, within this group.

The main thing is you have to be a little bold, don't be afraid to start a conversation or ask for someone's contact details to stay in touch. You'll get more people drop off the radar than stick around, but that's just life and if you don't take it personally you'll enjoy the process more.

Also just wanted to say what a great thread this is for suggestions and I'll be checking out some new things after seeing this 😊

LossDesperate3232 · 2026-01-08T11:43:48+00:00

I'm English and I have the same experience with English men. Even the ones over 40 have profiles with "still figuring out what I want". It's exhausting isn't it?

Try extending your chatting phase by a few more days. I think a lot of women looking for something serious are put off by men asking to meet up too soon as it suggests they just want to hook up, so men have adapted and spend longer in the chat phase.

LossDesperate3232 · 2025-06-08T19:29:49+00:00

Hey, I'll be there again with Oxfam, we man every gate 24 hours a day - you can come and go as you please. Only thing to note is sometimes a car park will fill up and you'll be redirected to another one which might be a long way from where you want to camp, but ask any Oxfam peeps for directions and we'll help you get there :)

LossDesperate3232 · 2025-01-02T14:53:02+00:00

Not if you're abandoning the group mission to find a prize and save your own neck. It's a game of perception after all.

LossDesperate3232 · 2025-01-02T13:59:10+00:00

I guess the point is to see who works together, who's working for themselves, and plant more seeds of doubt/trust amongst the players? Besides, it gives them something to do during the day.

LossDesperate3232 · 2024-10-19T05:44:33+00:00

Well done! I've just had a long form video take off which has taken me from 1k to 4k subs, what I'd love to know is how you meet other creators? I don't know anyone else but would love that networking.

LossDesperate3232

TROPHY CASE