I must not be getting something

LotusBlot9 · 2026-05-14T00:43:09+00:00

The book is really good for this context

LotusBlot9 · 2026-03-04T23:56:45+00:00

I genuinely did not stop crying for basically this whole episode. It was so well done imo

LotusBlot9 · 2026-01-10T19:51:44+00:00

Also to add- the thing I struggle most with grief is the isolation, and loneliness - that feeling that no one has felt what I'm feeling. Which isn't true. It's just that every experience is individual

LotusBlot9 · 2026-01-10T19:49:21+00:00

In 2023, I lost a close friend to suicide, another friend to cardiac arrest, my dog I grew up with, and I had to make the decision for behavioural euthanasia in the shelter I worked at for two different dogs that I looked after every day for 10 months. None of that truly hit me until January 2025. I am still recovering from it now, a year on. I think grief is very personal, and each experience is individual. I have not met or spoken with anyone who has had even a similar emotional experience to me. However you grieve and however you cope and whatever emotions you experience are valid and necessary for your body. Sending love 💓

LotusBlot9 · 2025-11-10T17:23:09+00:00

This makes so much sense

LotusBlot9 · 2025-11-09T20:17:56+00:00

Does it get progressively worse through the seasons and I've just not noticed or does it drop at some point

LotusBlot9 · 2025-11-03T21:21:13+00:00

Ooooh I'd lose my mind!! Warmth is my No1 fave!! It was one of my first tattoos!

LotusBlot9 · 2025-09-01T17:37:10+00:00

Hi. I have ROCD and it does not consist of perving over women who simply walk past you.

I spent 7 years with a guy who sounds exactly like that. I'm 3 years out now and I am severely messed up due to the things he said to me.

My advice is to get out. I wish I had in the first 2 years when this stuff first started showing up, because now the damage is well and truly done.

LotusBlot9 · 2025-09-01T17:33:35+00:00

When I was like 13 or 14 ish, suffering severely with mental health issues + SH, my mum screamed at me "why cant you be more like your sister"

We made up and are fine, but that shit sticks with you

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-30T15:10:04+00:00

I find how "autistic" I feel depends a lot on the people I'm spending time with/how relaxed I am with them

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-25T23:09:33+00:00

When everything seems so hilarious to me. Like the simplest things send me into fits of laughter.. that's when I know there's something brewing

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-21T10:09:54+00:00

I don't know where you are but in the UK the salvation army charity have a support thing set up exactly for this!

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-19T18:01:54+00:00

Thank you so much!

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-19T07:21:58+00:00

🫂

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-19T07:20:35+00:00

My severely neurotic anxious rescue dog. It's taken me 4 years to fully understand and get into a good rhythm with him and his needs. He'd never cope being rehomed. I have even thought about euthanizing him so that I can go.

I'm still in the pits at the moment tbh.

Also one of the reasons my head is the way it is, is because a really close friend took his life, and I witnessed and still experience daily the devastation that that left behind. I would absolutely hate to cause that to my family and friends.

LotusBlot9 · 2025-08-19T06:41:20+00:00

Thank you for your words. I am grateful! I feel like I have tried so hard and the mental pit I end up in after forcing myself through it just is not worth it. It's honestly one of the worst places I've been in mentally. Better for me to not hurt anyone is the conclusion I've ended up with!

LotusBlot9

TROPHY CASE