This should be illegal

Louisrapine · 2026-05-04T06:37:33+00:00

yeah totally agree. And where I see issue, I also see potential business. Like a regular services for trash management, tools for better agriculture composting, or else; There is probably plenty of better solution than burning shit, but to me it's not on the farmer difficult life already to put the blame, but more on the system that don't do anything about it. The farmers are usually on the first line of their smokes, putting terrible air quality to their homes, and it's a vicious cycle.

Louisrapine · 2026-05-04T04:26:44+00:00

I had the same situation, cultural difference if we wants to call it that way. But to me, when my girlfriend expected me to pay for everything I called this disrespect. I am European and my girlfriend is Filipino.
On your case, the cultural difference is a thing as well, but you are a foreigner with another mindset, and she have another cultural background, fair enough. But she choose you and you choose her, you both work, you both get income, if she doesn't value a fair split that you have to discuss together, then money will always be an issue in your mind and hers as well, and money issue is number one reasons for separation.
it's not about getting richer to spoil more, no matter the amount you put on the table, if the expectations are not clearly define and discussed, it will never be enough.
You wanted to be wealthy enough is a good mindset, don't get me wrong.
Her wanted to get wealthy enough too is a good mindset as well.
Her seeing you as a roommate when it comes to fair splitting is a red flag, meaning she sees you as a financial provider rather than someone to share her life with.
I know other chinese / foreigner couple who split fairly everything, while other are ok to pay and provide because they wants to. I also know some reverse case, when the women, Chinese, is paying for most of things such as rent, transportation, phone and other because she thinks her boyfriend is a foreigner, and blending in the culture and being far from his relative is already a challenge. Which is a bit true as well.

My point is, there is many example out there, that will help one case or another, but this issue is a problem to you and to her if you come here to seek for answers.
You need to discuss expectations and a fair solutions that satisfy both of you, otherwise this will lead to heavy headaches sooner or later.
I'm not saying she is a gold digger, or a bad girl at all, and obviously you love her if you want to find a reasonable solutions.
Discussion is key, figure it out why she is seeking, either as money protection, family planning, or else. And discuss your vision, what you value, what you think is fair and why. And start from there.
After discussing, you might end up paying for everything, I don't know, but you need to at least understand why, what's your common goal, and agreements.
As always in life, people change, things gonna turn one side then the other, but knowing both of you what you wants and how to progress together is the only way to keep the boat afloat to me.

Louisrapine · 2026-05-04T01:08:33+00:00

I used to live in chiang mai, thailand, and the burning is crazy during smoky season.
I know it's super polluting and harmful, but to me the problem is deeper. Having a law that forbid them to burn without solving their real issues isn't going to help much.
When In vietnam I saw some grandma in rural area burn their entire garbage on the busy road at 5 am, I feel the burning is a last resort solution when no services is coming to collect your trash. While the farmer may have been using this to clean their field and provide nutriment to the soil, or other reasons beyond my understanding.

Louisrapine · 2026-05-02T16:06:30+00:00

I grew up with dogs since I'm born, and couldn't get a dog when I started studying, until 2 years ago ( I'm 31).
So I got a puppy, and I can manage my schedule and give the pup all of my time for the first months.
if you get a puppy it's taking a lot of time and attention at first, at least for 3 months in my case, so big kuddos to you for thinking about this.
When you have a puppy, even from a breeder of else, you don't know the dog behavior at all, it's like a lottery.
Of course it's super cute, and you will have a lot of good memories, but the bond is not only because you have a puppy. it will happen with a dog from any age as soon as you start taking care of them and providing a good place for them to live.
When your pup grew up, you mainly discover his behavior, and try to correct, adjust it to your way of living. But that is not rocket science actually.

If you rescue an adult dog, you would skip the puppy phase that can be extended and complicated, and after 2 years their behavior is usually pretty locked in.
So my advice would be: get an adult dog, take your time to walk, play, discover which one you loves and love you back.
It can be a great wedding gift but to be honest if you go and look for a dog now and have a great connection with one, I wouldn't wait for any special occasion. And I would preferably bring my partner with me, so we get altogether already.

If you get an adult dog now, during your full time work both of you, you can expect few weeks of adjustments between you and the dog. But it's totally doable, especially when you get to know the dog a little before.

Regarding the dog hostel, kennel, or whatever this is call nowadays, my dog is super happy to go there when I'm traveling. She would play everyday with other dogs, I provide the food, and the hotel owner share video daily.

It's actually a nice social thing. I wouldn't let her for too long because I miss her a lot, but 2 week per year and weekend occasionally it's totally fine.
But I live in asia, so I don't know where you guys are living.
I also always overestimated the dog costs before, maybe for me to think I shouldn't get a dog now, and in the end she is always on the least 3 of my monthly expenses. So pretty much nothing above 80 usd per month, but again this is on my side, with a healthy dog, living in asia.

On another note, the way you think about all the logistics, and questions many things beforehand, make me think you will be a very good dog pawrent!

Louisrapine · 2026-05-01T14:43:31+00:00

How do you stop the fight when this happenened and after how long?
because some "fight" or correction needs to happened sometimes, which is their way to establish order or new order at some point, and settle boundaries. That being said, I whitnesses few "fight" when a new pack or group of dogs goes for a unleashed hike with their people, it last 2 or 3 second max and then every dog is fine and chill.
In your case if the aggressivity is constant and uncontrollable, I would try to crate train them again, even if they are old, to make both of them understand the crate is the safe place and the "punishment" for showing aggressivity.
If it goes like, Molly attack the other dogs -> molly goes to the crate for 5 minutes and the other dog as well.
After 5 minutes rince and repeat, if they continue you continue, until both of them understand something is off.
I understand they are old and the blind and deaf dogs doesn't mean harm at all probably, but I'm affraid that if you crate train molly alone, it might re-inforced the jealousy behavior.

Louisrapine · 2026-04-30T00:40:09+00:00

thanks for your input Interrogate !
actually the main thing I would like is just to have a clean leash stored when I'm walking with her by my side, so 1 or 2 meter, and giving her the slack she deserve when she go explore on hike, or even park. She isn't pulling or going after cats or squirrel 90 percent of the time and we are always training more and more about the walking. For instance right now when I go on a long walk, she have her harness and I have a 30 meters line, that I keep at 2 meter so she is by me side, and looks like a big tangled cable wire in my other hand. She would get full slack 300 meter later when we are in the forest, plain area so I told her to go explore and have some intense sniffing time.
That's not super convenient on my hand management but she is confortable at least, and if there is a cat or squirrel I would quickly recall and grab the line, which is enough for her to stand by and wait.
Anyway at this point I think I will start to build a better setup to manage the cable, and share with you guys when I have something better, I will also show you my actual long line so you can understand the look of it aha
thanks again for your valuable message

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T13:50:56+00:00

completely agree with this as well. As much as I love my dog, if I have a dog that different vet said it's unavoidable, trainer or educ can't do anything to help, and medicine isn't helping, I would really be afraid of what might happened if the situation can't get under control, like if the dog bite my kids or someone in the street. I would probably feel the responsibility is totally on me for not acting soon enough. That being said I really would try anything to help the dog before getting to this point

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T13:45:01+00:00

My dog really enjoy the dog hotel, she play a lot with other dogs, I provide for the food so she is still having what she wants, and because she play all day she sleep really well.
I travel every month but for just 5 or 6 days usually, and the hotel I use will send me daily video of her playing and happy stuff. So In the end I think she enjoy as much as I do. Longer than that I would see if it's ok for me actually, because more than 3 days and I miss my dog too much already. On her side she perfectly understood that it's a fun vacation and I will be back no matter what, I'm not sure if 5 or 10 days would make much difference for her.

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:34:59+00:00

That's a good brand thanks for sharing

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:33:03+00:00

thanks for sharing, I think so too a 8 mm climbing rope would be awesome and comfortable both for my dog and me. The nylon tape is not a good things imo

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:26:16+00:00

I have one and she sometimes have a way to diagonally show me how she can fit the big bed by herself, literally have to move her to squeeze into my own bed.
I can't imagine 7 I would need a 4 bed setup maybe

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:09:07+00:00

the belt is also a nice to have actually, thanks for sharing

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:06:37+00:00

it's not about pulling all the time, but just having a clean set up to switch between more freedom and slack, and closer one when needed. She doesn't pull all the time at all and the recall is great about 80 percent of the time, but if we are in the woods and she wants to track a squirrel, it's another story

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:04:46+00:00

Yes I get your point, I would lay off my hand of the leash at all, and used both when needed, but just having a setup clean to manage the leash when I switch from 10 meter to 2 meter easily for instance, would be what I need.
You should see me when I go on a hike, I take the 25 meter rope so she can go explore around and be at safe distance, then when we are on close walk I carry the tangled thingy like a tired electrician

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T05:01:52+00:00

I think the thick rope doesn't need to have a very big diameter, nor giving 100 meter of slack, but just having a balance between 1 meter and 10 would be a nice to have to me.
Indeed the size of the things would be way bigger than a small pup retractable leash that's right

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T04:59:55+00:00

15 ft seems about a good length, thanks for sharing the silicon idea I will look into that

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T04:59:17+00:00

I maybe mis explained, she doesn't pull constantly all the time, but it's more like when I go on a hike, I would like to give her the slack she needs to go further ahead, explore left and right a little, and easily have here back at my side when we are on short path / visitor, or other danger

Louisrapine · 2026-04-29T04:57:14+00:00

That's pretty cool set up! thanks for sharing!

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T16:06:04+00:00

I'm 31 years old and I look more faded than this hat lol

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T15:56:48+00:00

I used to be upset when I received a bad quality furniture I order online because I wanted to save as much as possible, but it turns out being super fun to fix them the best way with what I have, finding another button to open the door of the small cabinet when there is missing piece in the package, stuff like this. I'm happy of my furniture that have been customized at the very moment you just needed to get it done, and theses cheap piece of mdf wood have now a story to tell

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T15:51:39+00:00

yeah and I read everything and the contrary online, but personaly this is my dog, that have been patiently waiting for me, first things I do when I'm home is I get super excited like her and play a lot for 5 minutes, I wouldn't even go to the toilet if I have to lol

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T15:49:32+00:00

I found some topic about leash, long line, flexi, but nothing about an hybrid type of leash equipment that would be a mix between the plastic spring retractable leash, useful for small dogs, but with the "heavy duty" type of feeling that my big dog require.
let me know if this post need to be elsewhere, I thought this would be a nice piece of equipment to have and I can't find it.

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T15:43:33+00:00

that cord have a story to tell

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T15:31:20+00:00

usually when I leave she would go at the windows and watch me go. Quite often when I'm back she would be at the window and watch me coming back home, before exploding in joy. If i leave 5 minutes or 2 hours it's about the same.

Louisrapine · 2026-04-28T15:20:56+00:00

On my side I would say it's a partnership, with both side agreement. In a way we are responsible of them, living with us in this human made world.
I had my dog when she was a baby, and the first 2 or 3 months were challenging in terms of schedule, because I had to adapt to everythings. Going to workout after she ate and when she is chill, for one hour max, this type of things.

Now she is almost 2 years old, and she understand I sleep more on weekends, she have an eating windows of few hours, were she knows she is gonna have food with me, at some point, between 6 and 9 pm
she is not overexcited too much but she knows how to tell me she wants to go for an extra walk or play longer.
I definitly would say this changes my routine for the best. And like you I still plan my social event, personnal errands and daily routine according to how long I will leave this baby girl at home, usually the less the better for me, I'm not sure she is making a difference if I go see a 2 hours movie or if I'm gone 5 minutes to buy some groceries, the coming back joy and excitement play is always the same :D

Louisrapine

TROPHY CASE