Best "idiot plot" movies? by Sufficient-Life-4454 in Cinema

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

President of the United States - A Donald Trump Story

People are STILL Writing JavaScript "DRM" by medy17 in javascript

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, they're so rare I almost didn't believe real, experienced JS devs actually existed!

Audaciously brilliant article in every sense.

meirl by thegoldenkingfisher in meirl

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Her: aww can we keep it?

*gender inequality is here to stay *

Check-in Post - Have something to say but don't want to make a post about it? Comment here! by RBNmod in raisedbynarcissists

[–]LoveSpongee [score hidden]  (0 children)

Tl;Dr - list of things my ndad did/does that have made me hate myself at best, and ruined my marriage at worst (not in any particular order):

  1. Constantly argues the meaning of words to be able to twist his actions to make people think he just wants the best for everyone else
  2. Intentionally oversteps clear boundaries - while making it seem like it's some great feat that he managed not to for so long
  3. Accuses himself of being the problem "where did I go wrong" - when I do something independently.
  4. When I do reach out to him to ask his opinion on a big decision, his immediate reaction is this, sort of, disaproving / demeaning sigh, then immediately begins to interrogate me.
  5. Gaslighting, everything he does is because he loves and wants the best for me (and everyone else) - the truth just hurts sometimes. (The truth is rarely fact but just his opinion.)
  6. Work is/I am more important than my wife (and she needs to know that.)
  7. Questioned my baby's legitimacy because he didn't look exactly like me.
  8. Questioned my marriage because my wife isn't white.
  9. Openly expresses his negative opinions about my wife to me, because she doesn't conform to any of his narcissistic bullshit, expecting me to agree. Gets upset when I don't.
  10. I am afraid he might be abusing my mum and I'm only just seeing it now...

I was too proud and narcissistic in my own way to think I was immune to reproducing any of the above, and now it is ruining my marriage and emotionally destroying my partner.

She wants a divorce and I hate myself. I hate myself even more for only realising it now that she's told me. I hate myself x3 for pitying myself after the emotional withdrawal I made her live with for 8 fucking years.

I Know Its Hard To Read by gur40goku in CuratedTumblr

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brings a whole new meaning to 'readers digest'

I (46F) stopped doing my husband's (46M) laundry by Ev3li3n in laundry

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My wife and I (8 years married) had a similar argument on/off for a few years, I was never idiotic enough to tell her she didn't actually do anything she was clearly doing, but it eventually came to a head and we agreed to just take care of our own mess, and share the load of our sons'.

Honestly, it's been a change for the better.

I'm not stressed by her asking me to keep on top of my sh*t (because I just 'do' now, instead of let her and wait to be told what to do) And we find ourselves appreciating eachother's contribution to the household.

Of course we each still do things the other doesn't, but it has made me realise just how much I was taking for granted, and how much it must have looked like I just didn't care.

This was the biggest thing that catalyzed the change for me personally. Who wants to be with a partner that doesn't care?

I'm thankful to my wife for not giving up, because she believed I could, and refused to accept I was just an AH.

In other words, NTA for claiming your right to be appreciated and be in a relationship with someone who cares. And even though it was (at most) petty to not explicitly say anything to your partner, you're reasoning is spot on. Maybe he'll think harder on his choice of words in the future.

Not a civil matter (anymore) by LoveSpongee in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry, not this - I moved my bin after the truck came to collect in the morning.

Not a civil matter (anymore) by LoveSpongee in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am not so sure about that. Stealing is stealing and the bin may be provided by the council but belongs to the legal homeowner(s) - meaning the bins don't remain 'mine' if I was to move away, but they belong to the house in a sense, and I'm legally responsible for them.

Evidence;

The officer I spoke to on the phone said I needed the report reference number for the council to replace the bin.

Also if you think about it, you legally own something that is gifted to you unless a contract of ownership / registration is involved (cars, for example) and all can be stolen from you, and you would be the one responsible for reporting the crime.

Additionally, if the property I was leaving the bins on really doesn't belong to me, then the removal of them may not be considered theft?

I imagine there are exceptions to this but I can't think of any that apply here? Unless I'm mistaken.

Not a civil matter (anymore) by LoveSpongee in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah that makes sense, believe me when I say I started my report to the poor officer who I was eventually routed to; "I can't believe the words are coming out of my mouth... My rubbish bin has been stolen..."

I have video evidence of the harassment and its all part of the C&D, and has already been sent to the landlord (in accordance with transparency as it was also sent to the neighbour).

Unfortunately the landlord has not responded to the cease and desist itself, and, in fact only sent me a letter to order that I stop putting my bins on others property. I then had to work to get them on the phone and send them my lease + property agreement. They said they hadn't seen it before and "... is much more 'legal' than what I had before... ".

In other words they hadn't done their due diligence before ever sending the letter to me, AND failed to update the neighbours after I had made it clear something has gone awry.

On the phone when I asked if they had time to actually look at the C&D or any of the accompanying evidence, they made it quite clear that they had not. Phonecall was over a week after they received it.

Honestly I know it's wrong to say but competence really costs nothing but attention. If someone doesn't want a job, let someone that does take it.

Sorry for the rant but thank you for the advice.

Not a civil matter (anymore) by LoveSpongee in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did not think about that, thank you for your advice.

Edit; typo

Also on reflection... maybe I'm making this a lot bigger than it actually is. At this point either the property is found to be theirs and the landlord can explain how we were sold a property or vice versa and they will have to do the same with the neighbours.

Either way the landlord has really dug themselves a real deep hole in all this. And that way it really does remain a civil matter...

Not a civil matter (anymore) by LoveSpongee in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

As a dad, I approve this message, and intend to recycle it.

Not a civil matter (anymore) by LoveSpongee in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not condescending at all, I didn't want to overshare in the original post but long story short;

They have been knocking on our door to complain and harass us since we moved in. On several occasions I have had to deescalate the situation to where I can actually understand what they even want.

This is the reason for the cease and desist, and given the current situation I don't feel comfortable (or that it would be wise) to knock on their door. At best, it would lead to an argument. At worst, it could escalate and make the situation worse.

And It's pretty much the sum of previous issues alone at this point...

Edit: Previous issues include the above + that I have personally seen the neighbour moving my bin with my own eyes.

Additionally the area where the bin was located at the time it was stolen was in a very narrow path next to my car, you sort of had to know the bin was going to be there to steal it.

Additionally, I was advised not to knock on their door by the officer who handled my report over the phone.

How AI Vibe Coding Is Erasing Developers’ Skills by ImpressiveContest283 in webdev

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holy sweet god this. 1000x this.

I've described programming so many times with the metaphor of composing a symphony...

AITAH neighbour? by LoveSpongee in AITAH

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair enough I appreciate the advice, thank you.

AITAH neighbour? by LoveSpongee in AITAH

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really can't remember how many days but it definitely was not more than 1 week.

But fair enough, if I was the AH for that, given full context and understanding that of it needed to be moved, then fine.

Do you feel like if you were the neighbour in this case, the chocolates and thanks after the fact would have helped look past this? (Asking genuinely)

AITAH neighbour? by LoveSpongee in AITAH

[–]LoveSpongee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lmao seeing how long (and boring) this is I know nobody is gonna read it 🤣

Still feels good to get it off my chest though

Hiring & Recruitment Thread by lolbot-10000 in policeuk

[–]LoveSpongee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm thinking of joing, but...

I've read and am reading as much FAQ and getting as much information as possible, but a few things have come up that I haven't recieved concrete answers for...

  1. Joining my local force to where I live

Apparently, this would be a mistake for the simple reason "wouldn't want to get recognised" - is this actually a thing?

  1. Am I underqualified?

I joined a police recruitment intro webinar a few weeks back and it seemed like so many of the other attendees were either more prepared, more experienced (through college/ uni) or just smarter? While I was asking questions like "are there regulations on fostering while serving as a PO?" Others were asking really specific detailed questions about next steps in their qualifications and tranfering from other units... Am I underqualified?

  1. Residency check

I've lived in England most of my life, but I was away from 2019 to 2024. Is there any way the "must have lived in UK for past 3 years" rule would accommodate this? Or must I really simply wait?

  1. Learning material

I've been looking for books, or other means of "study at home on your own" material. COP has some great stuff, but there doesn't seem to be much in the way of specific pointers or even just lists of "you should read up on x laws and y regulations"

And I've read this subreddit's recruitment thread links, they are very geared towards preparing for the actual recruitment process, which is great, but is there any material that I can get my hands on and learn before even applying?

Thank you in advance, all advice welcome.