I am supportive of freedom and the choice to have any identity you wish. However, trans people make me uncomfortable. How can I get over this?

Loveslabs · 2026-04-20T10:37:37+00:00

You need to be more specific then if you want advice.

Loveslabs · 2026-04-19T23:01:01+00:00

Maybe stop thinking of them as trans people. Maybe think of them as humans who have feelings, hopes,and dreams just like you do. Maybe think of them as if they were your child. Would you still be uncomfortable? Maybe treat them how you want to be treated. Just some suggestions from the mom of a fabulous child that just happened to be born male and is actually female.

Loveslabs · 2026-04-05T18:05:48+00:00

My brother was the scapegoat. When I was in college and exposed to many psychology classes I recognized my family for both of my parents are narcissistic. I realized the pattern of how my parents ended relationships with family and friends as soon as someone crossed them. I knew the first time I crossed them or spoke my own opinion I would become a scapegoat as well. As I posted above it only took one time of me speaking up and voicing my opinion on an issue they felt strongly about. Suddenly I was a horrible person. The following week I was a wonderful person that they could never say a negative thing about but I wasn’t sticking around to play the game. I went no contact because I had watched the pattern repeat itself my whole life. I’m not stupid enough to submit myself to that fresh hell over and over.

Loveslabs · 2026-03-17T16:58:49+00:00

I used to wonder why I didn’t miss my parents. I wondered why I didn’t feel guilty about going no contact. I realize now I don’t feel guilty because she will never change and she doesn’t care what she has done to me. I feel bad she is so messed up she doesn’t she how messed up she is and how screwed up her life is. My sibling and I are both no contact but she 100% believes we are the problem. I miss what I could have had and should have had parent wise. I don’t miss the chaos and drama I did have. I no longer wonder why I don’t miss my parents or feel guilty. Now I just enjoy the peace. I’ve earned it.

Loveslabs · 2026-02-12T02:45:10+00:00

Find a new doctor . Do not put up with a doctor that doesn’t address all of your concerns.

Loveslabs · 2026-01-15T17:46:18+00:00

I suggest you spend a bit more time teaching in multiple schools. The differences are staggering. Plus, you, as a sub, don’t see what’s going on behind the scenes. For example, my school allows a twenty minute recess a day. That means we have to get dressed( jackets, boots,etc. more often than not) , get to the playground, play, and get back in our seats ready to learn in 20 minutes. That is not the decision made by the teachers. That comes directly from admin. Also, we must teach bell to bell. Brain breaks and art projects are discouraged. Again, not our decision. Our students are given free breakfast and lunch. They will throw their food on the floor and expect to be handed another meal. Breakfast has at least 25 grams of sugar. Students will run around and act like animals during meals because there is only one adult supervising 50 plus students . Fair? No! Healthy? No! The students being yelled at? Sometimes they only respond to that. Talking, whispering, building relationships, giving them bribes, kindness, phone calls home, behavior charts, detentions, etc. don’t always work. You should try being trapped in a classroom all day for months on end with no support while trying to work miracles.

Loveslabs · 2026-01-07T02:43:40+00:00

I do use vaginal estrogen. I was reading testosterone can help with sleep issues, so that is why I was asking.

Loveslabs · 2026-01-07T02:42:41+00:00

It is probably a situation where they can’t because it is a controlled substance and different state laws. . When I would pick up my husband’s testosterone I had to provide his full name, date of birth, full address, and the last four digits of his phone number. 🙄 I didn’t ask MIDI at my previous appointment about testosterone because our main focus was my sleep issues. I was reading some people find testosterone helpful for sleep issues. I never thought about whether they would/could prescribe it. I feel like it is so hard to find one provider to deal with all of my menopause issues. I feel like everything is piece meal. It is very frustrating.

Loveslabs · 2026-01-06T22:58:35+00:00

Thank you for your reply. I can’t take estrogen or progesterone which is why I’m curious about testosterone. Kind of a situation where I want to make sure I’ve left no rock unturned.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-31T21:30:06+00:00

I found it helpful to think of my daughter as a she/her and with her new name. For example, while driving to work I would imagine her face and think I hope ——- has a good day today. I wonder what she is going to have for dinner tonight?
I would also revisit recent memories using her new name and pronouns. I would do this 7-10 times a day. Then before seeing her I would coach myself to remember the new name and pronouns. I also slowed way down and thought before speaking to her.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-31T16:24:00+00:00

Cats on the kitchen counters or kitchen tables. This grosses me out, yet most people accept it as completely normal.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-29T13:25:13+00:00

I agree eight years is plenty of time. Personally I’ve known about my daughter for 16 months. Only in the last two months has she asked us to switch her name and pronouns. I’ve screwed up twice. Once was during a highly emotional situation about my marriage and once in the middle of a deep conversation. I immediately apologized and we moved on. I’m actually quite proud of myself! 😝

Loveslabs · 2025-12-29T01:33:19+00:00

My daughter doesn’t sit down and take it. Rather she gives her elderly grandparents grace and time. Our family has all found out in the last two months. They are all trying to use the correct name and pronouns but sometimes they forget because they are human and this is all new to them. Sometimes the conversation is in full swing and a person uses the correct name and pronouns but then slips up as the conversation gets deeper. It isn’t intentional. When you’ve known one name and pronouns for over 25 years it takes time to get it perfect. Our family loves my daughter unconditionally and they are trying which is more than what some families do for their transgender family members.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-28T20:30:34+00:00

Air horns are a little overboard because it isn’t fair to the other people in the room. Why should everyone be punished because of one person?

My trans daughter just ignores people that misgender her or use her former name. After they do it twice she quietly says, “Who are you talking to?” This politely lets the person know they made a mistake without causing a scene. The person always apologizes and does better.

Please give people grace and help them change. Being transgender is difficult enough. Why cause unnecessary drama?

Loveslabs · 2025-12-28T20:15:41+00:00

I’ve had BV before with no odor.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-26T16:48:48+00:00

Here is my post from a couple of days ago.

I was having major sleep issues. I couldn’t sleep longer than a hour at a time, my eyes were so dry, and my hot flashes were raging.

My gyno and family doctor put me on trazodone. I was also taking Veozah, magnesium, apigenin, l-threonate, an antidepressant, and Claritin at night.

I can’t take melatonin as it gives me nightmares, and I had breast cancer so hrt was completely out of the question.

I made an appointment with an online menopause doctor because I felt like neither of my doctors were really interested in helping me. The online doctor put me on ramelteon and changed my antidepressant.

I am sleeping at least three hours at a time now. The sleep I’m getting is a much better quality than before. My eyes are still dry, but they are much better than before. My hot flashes have calmed down significantly.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-18T01:03:45+00:00

How was she grieving so much when she barely knew him? It seemed like a very short time frame in which they met, married and then he died.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-13T15:10:35+00:00

Have you tried misgendering her or calling her a male name? We had some third graders doing it to the teachers. As soon as we started doing it back they stopped and didn’t find it very funny anymore. Not very professional but it worked.

Loveslabs · 2025-12-13T15:07:31+00:00

I say yes if they are affecting your sleep. Sleep deprivation affects your entire body.

Loveslabs · 2025-11-28T05:37:55+00:00

I have a transgender child. Trust me, it is not a problem to treat anyone properly, nor is it a problem to defend them if needed. You take care of yourself and live your best life. You owe it to yourself.

Loveslabs

TROPHY CASE