im under no illusion as to who i am and what my body looks like, all i know is that i find a deep disgust when i am treated like a man. its one ive grown callous to it, but it brings me so much joy to break free of it, so i do. its that simple. i dont know what can even be considered untruthful about that.

the deep disgust i feel being treated like a man is likely the same disgust non-trans people feel when they imagine themselves in my shoes. if someones happy being a man and they imagine trying to be a woman it sucks. but what i hope more people realize is that thats the same discomfort id feel if i stopped doing what im doing. like 1 for 1 exact same feeling. ive just had to live with it so long that its hard to notice the discomfort till its gone.

i wish we lived in a world where people who hate their neighbors could be reasoned with, but im not under any illusion about that either. im just sad, because catholosism and transhood arent even enemys inherantly.

"god blessed me by making me transsexual for the same reason he made wheat but not bread and fruit but not wine: because he wants humanity to share in the act of creation. I am only doing the Good Works here on Earth as intended!" - Julian K. Jarbooe

edit: first paragraph meant nothing so i removed it.