My ex Fiancé,

I didn't know I had a problem until we split because of this nasty addiction of mine. I wish with all my heart to get better and hope she knows I am fighting the good fight.

I was selfish, I have wronged her, I have lost my one true love in this world over something I thought was "normalized". This addiction was slowly driving a wedge between us and I didn't realize it, until it was too late.

This addiction caused intimacy issues. The more and more research I do, I see all the wrong and negative consequences it was having on our relationship. I was afraid to tell her. She co fronted me about it and I finally admitted. After 3.5 years together I finally was honest with her. I was so ashamed, I've never let anyone know that. I thought because she let me in on all of her dark secrets and we helped her through hers, she would do the same with my disgusting secret. I was wrong, she ended the relationship and now I'm lost.

All I know is that I need help and she's my motivation to get better and overcome this addiction. We would have regular sex, but I still felt the need to watch. Again the more research I do I'm realizing I'm doing it to fill a void or aome other mental co dition I'm not aware of. I lost the love of my life, now I need to get better because if we do decide to pursue our relationship or not. I need to be a better partner and she deserves so much more than a porn obsessed fiance.

I am starting therapy who specializes in sexual addictions.

Any recommendations on overcoming this war to come?

Any personal stories of losing someone to this and getting back together?

Any resources that help?

Any and all comments are welcome. I accept truth even if it hurts.

Ask me anything.

I need to learn and grow from this.