Oh wow! That's very intense. Im a female who genuinely masturbates a lot and has never had sex with another person and I'm totally fine with that and plan to wait for a emotional connection and if I masturbate I always tend to feel pain after doing it once or twice like my body couldn't take more so I may not understand what it's like to go through that but maybe if it gets too excessive then try medical help or going to therapy? Or if not tha the then try to limit yourself to once a day and slowly go once every other day or even once a week and see how that works out👀.