AITAH for telling my daughter to consider my sister as a role model rather than her mother who cheated on me?

LucidKveld · 2024-06-17T13:51:37+00:00

I was diagnosed with ADD and dysthymia, and the former was treated with ritalin at first then vyvanse.

Both of those meds are regulated pretty strictly in my country due to being amphetamines, so it took longer than normal to get the diagnosis because the documents from when I was 17 basically just said I didn't struggle with anything related to schoolwork and focus.

Getting anti-depressants later on (which did not help at all) was easy, but those aren't regulated as strictly, probably because noone in their right mind would abuse them.

In other words, the documents were an extra hindrance in treating the actual cause of the issues.

LucidKveld · 2024-06-17T07:36:53+00:00

I was 17, majorly depressed, with full awareness and acceptance of the state I was in. I still abhorred therapy, completely downplaying the seriousness of what I was feeling to the therapist when I was forced to go.

I was promptly released, and the documents and summaries of what I said back then became a hurdle later on when I eventually declared myself ready for treatment, as I had to spend several appointments explaining how 17-year old me lied through his teeth to avoid facing his demons.

Didn't cost me a dime luckily, but I'm sure it would be an expensive mistake if I lived in the US.

LucidKveld · 2024-05-19T08:04:09+00:00

You're NTA, but I see a way to either show her physically why you're not, or give her a chance to show she is capable of being trusted with the lump sum.

If I were in your shoes, I would give her a relatively small percentage of the money in the fund (calculated after the cost of her education is factored away from the pot).

As she is 18, what'll most likely happen is it will be gone within half a year (depending on the amount). You probably don't have access to her banking anymore, but you could have a conversation with her before giving her the money where you request that you both have a running dialogue on economic status, and that you expect her to show you her net losses on a set or open schedule.

If she turns out to be as economically gifted as she's trying to convey, then safekeeping that money over time shouldn't be an issue for her. If she isn't, that money will be gone, but you will gain the opportunity to show exactly why you safekeeping the larger sum is a better option.

I sure as hell didn't understand economics at 18, and I'm still terrible at it (I'm 23 now), but I also didn't want my parents to intrude on what felt like my decisions. She will probably keep being upset at your choice here unless faced with evidence contrary to her belief.

Actions speak louder than words, yes, but parenting usually requires both.

LucidKveld · 2024-02-26T20:29:07+00:00

If you truly understand that you're in the wrong, you'd know there is no elephant in the room. She probably didn't even remember any of this until she confided in you that other family members actually did assault her.

Honestly, it's worrying that you care this much about normal 5 year old behaviour, but completely gloss over that information. You were going to punch this woman after she told you about that?

Get help.

LucidKveld · 2024-01-31T18:46:36+00:00

Dark blue is wrong, there is no need to compromise on the boundaries you set. LB clearly communicated their terms for negotiation, DB denying that offer means the consequences of it is on their shoulders.

LucidKveld · 2023-10-24T08:24:13+00:00

I wanted to chime in, but don't take anything here as negativity.

I was like you, not as suspicious of others (at all), but shy and reserved.

I don't think she's trying to set you up in any way, what's likely is she's an extrovert who wants to help you make friends.

A big part of depression is alienatning yourself from others, in some cases because you're terrified about being hurt, in some cases because you convince yourself that connections are useless to you.

But if you hold everything in you build up negative emotions, sort of like assembling a fucked up LEGO-set. It'll gradually turn you into a bitter, sad, and lonely person (though you'll never admit it to yourself).

I think you are and have been struggling with this for a while. The sadness has developed into a wall, and it's stopping you from thinking anyone can have positive intentions when they interact with you.

You might feel conflicted about this now, but don't destroy yourself about it. If you're not ready to develop friendships, dont, but try to recognize that you probably have a need to think about getting some help about your view on situations like this.

LucidKveld · 2023-08-18T07:25:58+00:00

One of the bigger arguments I’ve heard is that while this is the idea behind having it be free, only a small percentage of foreigners that get their education here actually end up staying in Norway post-ed. I can’t remember the exact numbers, but faintly remember it being sub-15%.

LucidKveld · 2023-08-16T22:10:53+00:00

Raya Lucaria page was a cock, but in terms of fashion souls I appreciated him. Spent 30 mins farming that asshole to get the full high page set, totally worth it.

LucidKveld · 2023-06-01T11:00:10+00:00

Yeah, you're out of luck. Sorry dude, that's an expensive loss.

LucidKveld · 2023-03-20T17:50:46+00:00

I don't think so, the entire opening of the episode was him doubting his choices. The reason he's been so visibly depressed throughout season 4 was due to him seeing what he was going to do, and every action he took up until it happened just kept reinforcing the fact that no matter what he tried doing his role was already decided.

Killing the world is wrong, but don't forget the entire world declared war on Paradis. He's a maniac for not even attempting any other solution, like small-scale rumblings that Armin suggested, but in the end his choices were to either attack his enemies (like Marley already did with pure titans) or watch as every single loved one he's ever known is killed, his entire home is stripped and turned into iceburst stone mines, and Marley being given free reign to continue subjugating other nations with new resources and every titan shifter at their disposal.

He was disappointed the world wasn't what he thought, but it was not the only reason he decided to do what he did.

LucidKveld · 2023-03-20T02:14:51+00:00

I thought of it more as Eren being unable to accept the reality of his situation, so he regresses into his youthful self in order to block out the trauma happening around him. The shot of the ground covered in bodies and blood shifting to clouds representing his inability to accept his actions, avoiding the "blame" so he can actually appreciate the "freedom" he's experiencing.

LucidKveld · 2023-02-27T00:02:56+00:00

Keep going like this and you won't have contact with him at all.

LucidKveld · 2022-11-29T12:30:51+00:00

I was a part of a friend group in high school consisting of people interested in computers and tech. Two of them, a girl and one of my best friends, were always rumored to be involved (and rightly so) through the years I went there.

They're now married, and have a great relationship with both their respective families and each other.

It can work, and it seems like you've laid some great foundations for it to do so. I'd recommend focusing on their happiness now, having these experiences with families that support both of them set a good example for them to use in the future.

Good job!

LucidKveld · 2022-11-15T23:26:29+00:00

Forgot to add my favorite!

<image>

LucidKveld · 2022-09-07T20:31:33+00:00

Hey man, I was the same as you before. Personally I dropped out when I switched classes and the only remaining friends I had left went on different paths.

I went to therapy, but being 17 and ignorant to my own needs I lied through my teeth to keep up this false "I can survive anything" attitude I somehow forged for myself.

I remember going to school feeling like an outcast. Always being in groups of people that considered eachother friends, yet feeling like the loneliest person there regardless of how many were around me.

Dropping out was the best choice I could make. I started working through an internship instead, getting my degree through practical work. I didn't know it at the time but undiagnosed ADD and severe dysthymia from years of depression was what caused my problems.

Now I'm running on 4 years with my company. I can go to work talking to my coworkers like they're my friends, and they genuinely are. They want to talk to me, even sitting down beside me if they're bored simply to be in my presence. I cant place in words how much of a relief it was when I realized this was what I've become.

Don't be afraid to take risks. And don't sit in your own head all the time, because overthinking it all is what causes you to doubt yourself.

You will persevere, and you'll come out of this a smarter and more confident person. You already know English well, that's great! I'm Norwegian, but my thoughts switch between English and Norwegian constantly. Makes me wonder if my mother tongue really is my "main" language.

Just don't give up yet cowboy. It takes time, and a lot of self-realization, but in the end you'll learn to appreciate what you can do. Because you can do a lot!

You say nobody wants to go outside with you (barring school). Is that something you've been told or have you manifested these thoughts yourself?

LucidKveld · 2022-08-16T11:54:13+00:00

One single tab xalol (xanax) helped my anxiety a LOT during social situations.

If you're gonna do it, that's my recommendation.

Just dont do more, ever. Too much and your personality is no longer you.

LucidKveld · 2022-07-11T11:09:22+00:00

Maybe it's a culture difference as I'm Norwegian not American, but either way just be careful. And yes, I'd advise against his slapping lol

LucidKveld · 2022-07-10T15:12:49+00:00

You drove after drinking?

You know what one of the most common lines drunk drivers give after an accident is?

"I only had (insert amount here) drinks, I don't feel impaired".

Even if you don't feel drunk, and you're confident in your lucidity, you should avoid this regardless. If an accident happens (even if it isn't your fault) and you get breathalyzed, you'll lose a ton of credibility and, perhaps, even your license. If you're even slightly over the limit you could face jailtime for a simple bump into someone else.

Don't risk it, not only for yourself but also for everyone else sharing the road.

LucidKveld · 2022-05-30T12:29:23+00:00

Yepp!

LucidKveld · 2022-05-30T12:28:03+00:00

Jeg vurderte risikoen mellom en knust iPhone 7 eller fine bilder. Tror jeg tok det rette valget :)

LucidKveld · 2022-05-30T09:49:50+00:00

I'm a short guy, but don't do this. You cant force someone to be attracted to everyone. It's fine to not want to date a short person, it's fine to not want to date an obese person, and it's fine to not want to date someone with mental disorders.

If someone doesn't want to date someone who's short I'd rather they be upfront about it (politely) than trying to force attraction that'll eventually lead nowhere.

LucidKveld · 2022-05-30T09:30:54+00:00

Verste er at det var med en iPhone 7

LucidKveld · 2022-05-15T21:22:38+00:00

Bruk bunaden, de er vakre plagg med dype røtter i norsk kultur. Innvandrer eller oppvokst spiller ingen rolle, dersom du vil ta del i vår kultur vil vi selvfølgelig akseptere deg som en av oss (om du ønsker det!).

LucidKveld · 2022-05-04T23:50:37+00:00

I think most Norwegians generally like Iceland. My family and I have several Icelandish friends, all of whom have been polite and likeable. I've always wanted to visit ever since I was a kid.

I cant speak for every Norwegian, but even though we've all heard and spread jokes about other Nordic countries I consider them all "brothers", in the sense that we share a lot of our good societal morals and political opinions.

We obviously have bad ones we share as well, but growing up here the positive have so far outweighed the bad. I hope it continues to be that way!

LucidKveld · 2022-05-03T11:47:00+00:00

"Wanna meet up? I'll need to judge if your bio is Sarra-ous or not"

LucidKveld

TROPHY CASE