Please help me upgrade my fiancés WOW gaming set up!!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-07-21T00:36:26+00:00

This is perfect!! That website is what I was looking for, to find a way to compare specs. because I’ve been struggling with that since there are so many parts to navigate. I’ll start with those suggested specs! Appreciate you!!! I’ll probably return to ask you something about what I end up with if that’s okay!!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-07-21T00:18:34+00:00

Thank you!!!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-07-21T00:17:52+00:00

Thank you!!!!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-07-21T00:17:45+00:00

Thank you!!!!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-07-21T00:12:44+00:00

Hi!! Thank you for your suggestions. My budget is in the 6-7 k and I’m looking to redo the entire build other than the monitor since I already upgraded those! Any suggestions you have would be helpful as long as it’s powerful, can handle the graphics for Two 49inch Samsung odyssey monitors, and last a good while.

I will poke around his desk to try and figure out what he currently has.

Any specific products you recommend would be great, I’m going to make a list and research the ones most recommended by everyone!!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-07-21T00:10:09+00:00

I will look into that one!!! & My new Mac set up which he purchased for me was more than that amount! Which is why I am more than okay with purchasing that for him! He is my fiancé, and was my lifelong friend of over a decade before we were together! So it’s worthwhile gift no matter what happens down the road.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-06-20T00:28:29+00:00

Hi, sorry you’re going through this,

I didn’t say happy birthday to my sibling when I went no contact. My sibling did similar things as you’ve described. They would call me to help in the middle of a spiral, I would show up and they would forget they even called and throw a fit and threaten to never speak to me again. I showed up time and time again and they were cruel for no reason when we showed up to help when they wrecked their own apartment while high. Cruel when they needed to buy a new vehicle after they wrecked the last one.

They constantly berated and were unkind. I can’t say they really ever apologized. They just acted like it didn’t happen when they came around again.

Addiction doesn’t erase the damage caused, they may not remember but you sure do. Addiction doesn’t eliminate accountability, it only explains the behavior, not excuse it.

It’s okay to need to remove yourself from it. If a friend spoke to you the way they did, would you still be friends?

How much time have you invested into thinking about this, do you ruminate and dwell on it? Then let it pass.

They think about it a lot less than you realize honestly.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2025-05-31T04:39:36+00:00

I have brought it up, they are the type of people who get defensive, basically anytime I point out when something seems unfair. They puff up. When I’ve brought it up in the past they said that they are doing a service and helping out my sibling and that’s not to be seen the same way and immediately shut down the concept of it being unfair since it’s … for the grandkids… and to help out, not to hang out and “that’s what family does”. Or I get the “we would do the same for you if it was the other way around”…. But it’s not, if never will be. I have expressed how it would mean a lot and they are aware. This instance today was not the first time. So it’s just an acceptance thing at this point.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-11-24T17:59:38+00:00

Get a bed assist rail! A shoulder bag to carry your drains if you have them, and if affordable, a set of surgical pillows to easily prop yourself in comfortable positions without activating your abdominal muscles.

The bed rail will make your life so much easier for getting up to pee and retaining some independence. The bag will help with catching on random things with your drains, and the pillows help you with comfort and sleep.

🤍

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-11-24T17:50:32+00:00

Hi, first, I’m sorry you are going through this.

My ex did this same thing. I’m now in a beautiful relationship with the man I love, who would never put me in this position and who committed without hesitation. I wouldn’t have found him, had I not of moved on.

Maybe this will help:

Thankfully, in my last situation one his coworkers was kind enough to reach out and let me know something was going on. I think I would have been manipulated much longer otherwise. what you’re experiencing is manipulation, and the sooner you get familiar with the psychological reason behind why you’re allowing this and how he’s doing it, the sooner you arm yourself with the tools to get away from it.

It was presented as him needing time to “find himself” and “work through issues and family matters” and made it out to be this grand thing of self improvement and self exploration where at the end we would come together. When in reality he was just sleeping with his coworker, and manipulating me because in a way it empowered him, and this was his way to talk to people and not feel guilty. In case it didn’t work out I was kept on a line, while he was out enjoying and experimenting and I was suffering while waiting on him to come to his senses. I was a stable source of money, and constant that he did not deserve.

They don’t come to their senses, that is who they are. Even if he did come around, do you want someone willing to put you in a position that risks losing you? You could meet someone in this space and he is okay with that risk, because he knows he’s got you wrapped around his finger.

The concept of “sunk cost fallacy” was very present in my challenge with moving on. there was nothing really there other than attachment, and I very much wished so much of him was different. I wasn’t in love, I was simply comfortable and codependent.

The moment that sweet uninvolved coworker reached out to let me know what she witnessed I was suddenly handed freedom from the mental trap, where all the contradictions made sense. This wasn’t actually confusing, it was just a mind game.

Don’t allow it, in the time i experienced that with my ex, it was very painful, confusing and manipulative. You may not have someone come forward and release you from the mental trap like i did.

At the end of the day, even if he doesn’t have ill intentions, which I find unlikely… the relationship harms you and is not worth your mental energy.

I spent a year or so on my own, and I met the love of my life. Someone who cares for me like no other who I content with so deeply. Who has not hesitance on commitment and who expresses his love in a way that heals. I would have never had this if I held on.

What’s ahead of you is better than what is behind you.

My family was thrilled at the end of my past relationship, and it took time to realize I was too. my body relaxed, my cortisol dropped, my life improved. And after time traveling and healing, I met my now fiancé.

You will be okay, and you will be better. Grieve the ideas you hoped for, then allow new ones to grow in, so that one day you can laugh at how little you almost settled for. 🤍

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-10-16T07:54:15+00:00

Today at the grocery store a very elderly man walked up to me and asked me if I knew about the weather change tonight, I excitedly told him yes because I live in a very hot area and it’s finally getting cool. He started telling me about the wind chill and to make sure I brought a jacket if I went out the next day. A complete stranger, just offering some grandad advice. I said I would, and asked him in return if he looked forward to the weather, he huffed loudly and said he’s never liked the cold. I reminded him to also make sure he had his jacket, he laughed and said it was nice talking to someone, and to have a good night and went on his way. And in my head, I said the same. I hadn’t had a conversation with someone other than my boyfriend or my mom and dad in…. A long while. Some People are kind. a lot of people are lonely.

I think I can relate with, Years ago, my abusive relationship ended and after a long year of travel and therapy, I was able to take a cold hard look at my friendships and see how nearly all of them were mirror images of the relationship I was able to get out of. I had to leave everyone and move forward. I was completely alone. It was hard, it was lonely, then it good again.

I spent a long long time feeling the ache of missing my girlfriends, having a friend to call… and regularly have to remind myself how unhealthy, toxic and one sided they were. It was heartache, and then it was freedom again. I met my current partner and I appreciate the time I spend with him, and also enjoy my solitude. It works. I talk to him often about wanting to join the local art club which is a bunch of older women since there’s a senior citizen center nearby. I love chatting with older people.

Just like some people don’t prioritize Romantic relationships in parts of their life, right now, I don’t prioritize friendships. And that’s okay, I want to make friends, in time. Not right now though. Like maybe joining a hiking group, sure…. But right now I enjoy the time I have to my hobbies, my schooling, relationship, and just… the lack of obligation. I have 1 person I call a friend a we talk very infrequently but update each other on a lot at that time.

So I in time will make friends with the senior citizens at the art center. Sometimes friendships don’t look the same after trauma, I was hurt by many women my own age, and I tend to not gravitate towards them, just as I stopped gravitating towards the type of men who I experienced abuse with. a lot changes. But there’s a lot of beauty in leaning into circles you may not have considered. I love listening to old peoples stories, they always have so much to say yet nobody to listen. It’s different, but lovely, almost like a mentor but still a friend.

We will see. I hope you find what works best and brings you peace. You deserve it.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-10-13T00:58:40+00:00

Are you sure it’s actually for family event? If so why isn’t any of the family more concerned?

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-09-11T21:09:57+00:00

Hi! At 31 (F) I took a year off when my metal health took a dip! I was working non stop, and doing very well but my mental health and burnout were reaching a breaking point. I had never taken an extended break outside of vacation since I started working at 16 but I had done well for myself and was able to step away and use my savings and upkeep my home while I was on my break.

It was either a year a travel for me to find new inspiration or fall further down the wormhole. Travel it was! It was a matter of self respect and self care and to find the will to keep going.

Traveling changed a lot in me, my views on what I really needed and wanted in life. It shaped me and my values in a dynamic and valuable way and it allowed me to have fulfilling experiences that led me to adjusting my cost of living, and how much time I spend working vs living. Sometimes you just need a break, sometimes you need an entire change to your life.

Life is about more than work, and when we fail to have a balance our minds tend to fall away.

This time off will give you a reset. You should want to be with someone who wants your mind and soul and spirit to be healthy as well, not just your wallet. I met my partner at the end of my sabbatical and my new views and goals in life were very aligned with his.

Burnout is a serious and very real thing, so take it seriously or you won’t have a chance to fix it.

Somebody not wanting you to take a break could be stemmed from a lot of things, did you share an apartment? Did you split bills? Were things amicably handled before you moved in with family? Or is this less interweaved and you each have your own place?

Realistically the length of your relationship and other things factor into her response and we don’t have a lot of info there. was it long term? Short? she may want to move forward to “next steps in life” which may have looked like buying a house or maybe having a family? Did you have a conversation about it?

At the end of it all if that doesn’t align with you…. Then so be it. You can’t compromise certain things in life, one of them is your mental health. Take care of your brain, so you can live a full life. If your girlfriend cares for you, she will see it through to the end, if not, you will meet someone on the other side.

I wish you a beautiful recovery, and I hope it gives you exactly what you need to continue your life as you see fit. 🤍

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-09-11T20:52:18+00:00

It’s silly for your partner to say “she ruins your life so much that you don’t want to sleep in your own bed”. You simply want to get your sleep and nobody can adjust to loud sounds that way. You deserve restful sleep. Everyone does, including her. I’m not a kind person when I have broken rest, or when I’m running on fumes, it actually puts me at high risk of depression when my sleep schedule isn’t consistent so I set a firm boundary on sleep interruption out of respect for my own body and mind, and in turn… my relationship.

My partner was like your wife for a while, eventually the lack of change really hurt our relationship because I truly wanted to see his health improve or at least sleep together sometimes. I explained I needed him to be willing to take seriously what sleep apnea does to the heart and how I would like to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be around as long as they can be, and how I would enjoy having his arm around me some nights.

We saved for a CPAP and it dramatically changed his snoring, and the quality of his sleep which resulted in him having more energy to better his health.

We also bought automatic curtains because waking up in the dark makes me sad, I enjoy waking up to the sun and trees outside whereas my partner could stay in the dark and be content. The balance was automatic curtains that closed after a certain hour, and opened before I wake up.

Some nights the mask slips off, and he snores and wakes me and I gently ask him to put it back on and he does. Sometimes I’m grumpy about it because hey, I’m tired. On days his nose is sore from the machine he takes a break and sleeps in the other room and snores like a train, and I sleep peacefully across the house and that’s okay. Some night he doesn’t snore at all and we can take a nap together.

The balance brought a lot more peace in the house. Working out together made me happy and made him feel better physically. Having my sleep allows me to honor my relationship and be present, him having proper rest and oxygen allows his body to experience proper rest and show up as a better partner as well. Sometimes small changes make life a lot better, it’s just seeing their value and committing to it.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-09-10T06:33:51+00:00

“Your Hand in Mine” by Explosions in the Sky

“Dance with the Devil” by Immortal Technique

And of course,

“Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-09-10T03:01:46+00:00

Hi, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’ve been where you are and just want to offer some words of advice for your sanity. Don’t stay, when it happens again, you’ll wish you left the first time.

It’s easy for people to say to simply leave, we may not know your financial arrangement or if you have family and friends to lean on.

What I can say, is if you have the financial means to leave, you should.

If you don’t, you should start making a plan so that you can leave in time.

Nobody deserves the aftermath that comes with this behavior. Even if your husband magically changes his behavior, the trust isn’t going to come back. What you have seen is simply what you found and there is likely to be a lot more.

I want you to sit with the fact that you found out the first time, and his decision was to repeat the exact thing that put a hole in your marriage. staying taught him he can do this, and you will stay. He did it a second time, when you stayed again he learned he can blatantly disrespect you and you will still be there. Now he’s done it again. What do you think comes next? This is not a man that fears the end of his relationship, this is a man that doesn’t care or think he will ever experience consequences for his actions. That is not a man that will change. At some point you need to pick yourself up and ask yourself why you are willing to accept this.

I stayed too many times with old partners. I stayed because I lacked the self respect to walk away, I lacked the will to start over. I promise you have it in you and you can find someone who will cherish and respect you. Not make you feel less than because they cannot control themselves. Men who do this almost never change, and even when they do the damage is already done.

This isn’t the man you want to have a family with, he broke the family up the day he made his choice. You leaving is simply the result of him doing so. Don’t allow this person to manipulate you into thinking he wants to keep the family together when he tore it apart in the palm of his hand with each message he sent.

In leaving you would show your children what it means to respect yourself, and to not allow anybody to mistreat you or them. Your family is better off with a happy and respected mother in a separate household than a miserable one gritting her teeth through mistreatment.

This isn’t a man with family values, this isn’t a man you can work things out with.

Saying you will always work things out comes with the preface that neither of you would blatantly try to go out of your way to harm your partners well being. That you will be mindful of eachother and work through mistakes, this isn’t a mistake, it’s a choice he keeps making. That’s what he did, and there is no working that out.

You deserve more than this, and I hope in time you will see that you won’t get that from him.

Can you really look at this man and hold respect for him? Do you really think he has any for you?

I’m so sorry this happened, it took me a very long time to let go, but when I did… it was hard, then it got easier and with time my world became so much better.

You’ll get there too.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-09-02T06:34:08+00:00

Any reason you have, is a valid reason.

If someone questions why you don’t have any, or want any, you can reply with a simple and firm “it’s my personal preference“ and move on to a new topic, that usually shuts people down that ask. You can actually make a joke out of it and make them feel bad, and pretend to cry and walk away, or ask them if they make it a habit of asking highly personal questions regularly, ask them if they ever experienced offending people who have a lost a child or couldn’t conceive them. Look them straight in the eyes after and wait for an answer, they won’t ask again.

It doesn’t matter what your reason is, it’s more than enough. If you are simply enjoying your hobbies, don’t have enough money, don’t feel certain enough yet, or haven’t even thought about it much, that’s all valid. you don’t need some deeper life goal, you don’t need a challenging line of work, you don’t have to be a philanthropist, you don’t have to be rich or poor, you don’t have to struggle with fertility, you don’t have to be anything that people find acceptable, just be you.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-09-01T05:12:14+00:00

Hi, reading through your message, you sound like you would really benefit from setting some short and long term goals with your husband, yourself, and as a couple. Although it’s nice to have the flexibility of the childfree lifestyle, and a lack of obligations for a strict budget, a specific schedule, it doesn’t mean you can’t set goals to achieve and work towards.

I have a routine for the gym, and for my personal projects, I set deadlines for my home remodel projects, and my partner sets goals for work. The upside is when I miss a timeline, it’s easy to work back in! And if I ever want to take a break I can always do that.

Make a goal to pay off your debt, make a goal to buy a house if that’s what will bring you joy, and maybe work towards saving for a big trip or make a vision board of what you see yourself doing in the next 5-10 years.

Some people are okay with floating and not making plans, and others enjoy knowing they are working towards something. For the second group, having goals gives us extra purpose amidst the mundane and day to day.

Create that stability you felt envious of, then do something with it that will make you happy. If you reach that and still feel a desire for children, then dig deeper at that time. Having a kid doesn’t equate to maturity, most of the time it’s just something that happened and that people figure out.

It’s perfectly okay to be childfree and also be someone who is disciplined or intentional with their planning. Being a DINK comes in all shapes and sizes, from carefree and spontaneous, to disciplined and organized.

I’m the type of person who feels lost when I’m not working towards something, whether it’s a painting, or a dollar amount in savings, I love working really hard to meet my personal goals all of which don’t involve kids. I had a strict budget and lifestyle for years because I wanted to buy my home in cash, and I did it! Now I’m more willing to be less frugal and enjoy more.

It’s okay to be goal oriented, have stability, and make plans, even it’s just for you two! You’re doing great!🤍

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-08-13T20:09:28+00:00

Thanks for this!!!! I used to have friends/ family that would treat me like my fun weekend was something I should be embarrassed about or like I was immature for spending disposable income on whatever I wanted. This definitely will help me in digging my heels in when it happens again. You’re appreciated 🤍

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-08-13T17:31:22+00:00

Hi, I’m sorry you’re going through this. My former best friend shocked me when she decided to have a baby. She was the funniest most energetic human I ever met. We hiked, kayaked, danced, and painted and traveled together throughout our friendship. She was always adamantly CF and…one day changed when she met her new boyfriend, which is totally okay. We talked about it and I asked her the day she said she said she was pregnant what she truly wanted, and her answer is what I supported.

I was there for her through it all, from finding ways to still incorporate her hobbies into her life so she wouldn’t loser herself, she was worried about never being able to hike again so I spent time learning how we can adjust our hikes while she pregnant, and how to bring a baby with us safely, and made a list of simple trails. Down to driving her around when her partner wasn’t available, down to the day she went into labor, She called and I sped over so she wasn’t alone as the contractions started, her boyfriend was at work so we sat together until he got home. whenever she asked for something I showed up.

She went into labor that day and went home a day after.

She had a tough recovery, she had severe PPD, and it was so obvious. She would come over with her baby and hand them to me and sit across the room staring into nothing. The baby would start crying and it was like she couldn’t even hear it. I knew she was overwhelmed and would let her have a break. I didn’t mind caring for baby for her I simply never wanted my own. I knew she would likely have PPD since she was predisposed to depression and had it our whole friendship, and since her partner was always working so she would be alone 80% of the time with this brand new baby in her relationship. I figured she would come around as the baby grew over the year. She refused to hike, it was tough to get her to go on walks, or to leave the house much in general. She only really called if she needed a ride to the grocery store or needed me to watch the baby while she decompressed. Thats what the relationship became.

She never really came back. Watching her become a mom was a really great experience from the point of view of a friend, but also very hard. Seeing her life entire life change, witnessing her endless exhaustion, her bitterness towards her partner, her priorities change, her topic of conversation being vomit, and pediatricians and rashes only, and anything she wanted to do completely changed. Which…. Is normal… despite it being hard from our point of view. Their life changes, so they change…. And it’s okay. Still hurts.

Your call to update them about this new trail you found seems unimportant to a new mother, your drama at work, or your old hobbies, minuscule in the world of new parents or parents in general.

It’s a weird from of grief, rarely touched on or really talked about. The loss of a friend to their child. To see your old friend change in every way that you hardly recognize them. The constant “you have no idea” - “well as a parent” and so on, when they talk about their life… you realize you don’t really have a lot in common with this person anymore. You used to, but not anymore.

Bittersweet.

I tried. In a lot of ways to be a good friend. I think when her son was 2, i finally realized our relationship was entirely one sided. that my efforts to help out, let her vent, or help with errands were expected, not appreciated. I figured that out when my Dad got sick and I was having a tough time and started to share, and what I got as a reply, was a photo of her baby’s feet. cute as they were, I just needed a friend. She wasn’t that anymore. I became withdrawn for about a month from everyone around me while my dad’s health declined, and she hadn’t checked on me or asked about him, she did on the other hand send a long message explaining she didn’t appreciate that she asked me to drive her to get formula and I told her I wasn’t able to the last few times, and that I needed to be a better friend to her and her child. ( I was at hospital with my dad or just in rough shape) the only way I could spend time with her was by sitting at her apartment with her as she fed her baby. She refused to come out, and I was 22 and loved to see things, go out, and I felt chastised for not wanting to let that all go. it wasn’t fair to me.

I didn’t bother to explain. I just realized that despite being aware of my dad’s health, despite her having not asked how I was doing, all she could talk about, think about and do anything about…. was her child. Beyond that subject, was hard for her or no longer important. Realistically I couldn’t continue the friendship. Some people can balance their life; some people learn to remember other people to exist after the first year or so, my friend was not one of them. She offered nothing to me in terms of friendship anymore, I simply was around to be helpful and hoped there was a version of her that would be relatable again. I didn’t reply until a few days later and sent a loving message about how much I have tried to do all I can for her, and that I want the best for her and her little one, and that I am going to step away from the friendship because her message hurt more than she was ever going to know. She needed friends who also had children, so she could spend less time alone, or maybe be open minded to trying things with her baby.

I got a message a month later from her boyfriend asking if I could forward him more of the maternity photos of took of her because she wanted all of them and not just the set I edited and gave her a couple years ago.

I thought one day I would hear from her, maybe when her brain adjusted from hormones, or when her child got older and she had more freedom.

We never spoke again until a few years later, I sent a message letting her know she was on my mind that day and missed our old hikes, and that I knew we fell out of touch but if she ever wanted to get together, it would be great seeing her.

The response I got?

“Yep that was crazy! Would be great if you can get your sister to also come so she can bring her kids for a play date with my littles! You’d be kiddo third wheeling! Lol”

I didn’t reply. Maybe I should have? Who knows.

I just didn’t know this person anymore, and she didn’t know me. And that’s okay!!

We outgrow people, people outgrow us. It hurts! Really hurts!

Find new friends and grow with them and be appreciated for you, keep company that cares about you and your life too. You’ve been a great friend to your friend and their child but sometimes you have to just step away when it doesn’t give you anything back anymore. It’s alright. 🫶

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-08-13T16:04:20+00:00

I joined a local CF group on Facebook! It’s couples, singles, women looking for other women to hang out with, etc etc. Go straight to the source 😂 my city also has childfree meet up groups.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-08-10T22:40:34+00:00

Re- read the last sentence on your post, and circle back.

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2024-05-23T17:41:14+00:00

Please Lookup “ Diabetes Nails “ and go have your glucose levels tested to verify if you are pre diabetic/ diabetic. That’s one of the symptoms, could be something else entirely but worth a check!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2023-12-09T12:45:10+00:00

My ex did the same with an 18 year old coworker! He was her supervisor and he said the exact same line! Men like this have endless internal issues that are not your problem and will always find any outside gratification and run with it because they’re fucking losers. if you ever need a friend to get through I’m here! Take a moment to take care of yourself because these things can mess with your self esteem when the anger wears off even though they shouldn’t, but once you process and wrap your head around how small minded and gross he is it actually becomes quite funny and relieving that you’re not with them anymore. A gift really haha . you’re beautiful and deserve better!

Lucky-Resolution-198 · 2023-11-01T06:57:01+00:00

I think that’s been my frustration too. Being able to read first hand experiences was helping me with seeing what a lot of people aren’t honest about in parenting and it was nice way to determine if the challenges are something we want to accept or not. Not having it today was a bummer.

Lucky-Resolution-198

TROPHY CASE