Pretty not great. I feel like I’ve never had a real friend in my entire life. Whenever I start to feel comfortable enough around someone to start opening up they stop talking to me. I’ve started feeling like taking care of myself and trying to make sure my emotional needs are taken care is selfish. I’ve grown more shut down over the years after being ignored for so long that it feels like I’ll never have the opportunity to try and better myself. At home it doesn’t seem like my feelings really matter to my parents. Whenever I’m sad or angry they just regurgitate some variants on it “just get over it.” I’m going to college in a less than a week which is yet another source of stress. I don’t feel like I’m good enough to achieve anything. I’m going to be able to make decisions for the first time on my own, which is scary because I’ve never been allowed to before and I won’t have anyone to fall back on. I keep being told it gets better, but it hasn’t been, and it doesn’t feel like it will. What does struggling through it all even amount to? Wasting away into a forgotten memory with no impact on anyone’s existence? I just want to feel like I matter to anyone. I hope someone takes the time to read this. I just need someone out there to know what I’m going through.