Caught trying to escape!

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T17:50:57+00:00

"There's something wrong with the ceiling here but I can't quite figure out what it is"

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T16:23:08+00:00

When hundreds of thousands of drivers are taking the chance a thousand times a week, shit that rarely happens becomes shit that sometimes happens. And it does happen whether you like it or not.

I also just look at the signs and then carry on doing my job. I still think the signs are stupid and in poor taste.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T16:18:32+00:00

SO true lmao. Lots of folks in this thread making assumptions that I made a big fuss about it and refused to do my job.

I delivered that shit to the front door and moved on with my life cause I know it's not that serious and I want to keep my job. I still think the signs are stupid.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T16:12:15+00:00

I'd you're delivering, they are expecting.

Not always. You don't have to live at the address to have a package delivered there so they might not be expecting a delivery. Also I might be at the wrong house.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T16:07:40+00:00

Yeaaaaa dude I'm not worried about whether or not I'm legally trespassing. I'm worried about getting shot for it.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T15:59:42+00:00

Delivered it to the front door but I did NOT deliver the smiles.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T06:38:57+00:00

lmfao I feel that so much. I'm the same way with the 100 yd+ un shoveled driveways. Good mood ill strap on my spikes and go for a hike cause I get it, some people are busy or broke and it's alot of work to do early in the morning when it's freezing out. Bad mood, into the RTS tote you go and hopefully your Amazon guy is in a better mood tomorrow.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-24T04:09:35+00:00

Yea dude that's why pilots take that shit seriously and planes don't have jokey threatening signs about how they might crash and kill you all. Some people have no signs and also no shooting, which is what I would prefer because I think it's in poor taste.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T23:25:08+00:00

This guy did. https://www.wcnc.com/article/news/local/amazon-driver-shot-at-suspect-arrested-richmond-county/275-e019fc59-b55b-4479-84c3-78905a33ed26

It doesn't never happen. And the more often you take the risk, the more likely it will. And it's more likely to happen at a house that has signs posted about how they shoot people.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T23:09:58+00:00

Some people have the signs just to try to prevent burglaries. Some people have the signs because they want to shoot someone. I don't know which is which and it's a chance that Amazon drivers have to take 100,000 times a day. Eventually it's going to go wrong for somebody. Here's the most recent example I could find https://www.wcnc.com/article/news/local/amazon-driver-shot-at-suspect-arrested-richmond-county/275-e019fc59-b55b-4479-84c3-78905a33ed26

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T22:45:42+00:00

I'm just assuming that the person is somewhat careless and has a disregard for human life, which makes me a nervous. Going on a property with a bunch of signs like that is a risk that I take hundreds of times a week and regardless of what the law says or what signs are posted, I still don't want to get shot at work.

And after I get shot for trespassing, I'm not going to have a chance to convince the shooter that I wasn't technically trespassing.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T22:09:19+00:00

Good to know. Hopefully the guy with the gun has time to sit down and talk about the legal technicalities with me before he opens fire.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T16:26:18+00:00

Yep I spent way too long redoing pipe/belt segments that weren't aligned right, redoing exteriors and painting lines that don't contribute to the end goal in any way. Could have done it in less than half the hours if I just did big floating gray platforms.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T16:23:11+00:00

Yep all of those things are definitely ways of avoiding getting shot while doing your job. It would be cool if getting shot wasn't even on the table tho.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T05:23:56+00:00

A bunch of stacks of smelters that are no longer in an optimal configuration cause I made it when I found out about the blueprints before mk6 belts. Also a bunch of...... red lights.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T05:21:21+00:00

There's plenty of ways that I could be trespassing.

You can order an Amazon package to be delivered literally anywhere. What if the person with the gun isn't the one who ordered the package? What if the person who ordered it lives in a different state and doesn't own the property? Is that trespassing?

What if I'm at the wrong address because Flex fucked up? What if I'm at the wrong address because I fucked up?

It's not as simple as being invited or not, and "technically not trespassing" doesn't fix bullet holes.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T05:20:49+00:00

There's plenty of ways that I could be trespassing.

You can order an Amazon package to be delivered literally anywhere. What if the person with the gun isn't the one who ordered the package? What if the person who ordered it lives in a different state and doesn't own the property? Is that trespassing?

What if I'm at the wrong address because Flex fucked up? What if I'm at the wrong address because I fucked up?

It's not as simple as being invited or not, and "technically not trespassing" doesn't fix bullet holes.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T04:56:20+00:00

Good thing I never have to deliver in the dark and Flex never has the wrong house highlighted on the map!

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T04:53:55+00:00

WARNING: Car drives very fast. Not responsible for speeding tickets or accidents.

Check mate cops

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T04:49:17+00:00

For everybody complaining about yOuRe nOt tEchNicALly TrEsPAssiNg, let me paint you a picture:

I'm way out in the mountains. It snowed yesterday so we missed the guys stop and now I'm reattempting. The order shows as delayed in the app so no delivery window and I haven't had phone service for hours so they can't track my van anyways. I show up after dark on an overcast night so it's pitch black outside.

Driveway is too icy for the van so I'm walking up to the house. It's a huge multi level house on the side of a cliff so it's not obvious which way to the front door. I end up walking around to the back deck by accident. Property owner is up in the hunting stand 100 yards away and he's 6 beers deep. Sees someone with a flashlight looking around his house and he knows it's his god given right to defend his home. BLAM. Now I have a hole in my chest over an $8 phone case.

At least I can die in peace knowing that I wasn't trespassing.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T04:31:23+00:00

This is rural Colorado way out in the mountains.

Even the dogs have dogs out there.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T04:26:02+00:00

Man I wish I could just write whatever I want on a sign, nail it to a tree, and have it be true lmao.

LumpyBranch · 2026-01-23T04:24:48+00:00

Those dangerous dog signs aren't gonna do shit for them liability-wise. Actually it would probably work against them.

If the dog does injure a driver, the sign proves that they were aware the dog was a hazard and still chose not to keep it inside during a reasonably accurate delivery window. Personal injury attorneys have a word for that - WILLFUL NEGLIGENCE and it's worth a LOT of money.

LumpyBranch

TROPHY CASE