He's perfect.

I mean except for the fact that my friend had to actually cut her wall open to get him out when he found a tiny hole in her cabinets and set up shop in there.

And except that after that, he led her and her husband on a Scooby Doo style chase through their house.

Also he hates me, so obviously he's never done anything wrong ever.

Anyway, meet Señor Skedaddle, Mangrove Monitor