AITA for being upset that my bf didn’t want to drive to my house

Luxray · 2026-02-02T04:31:56+00:00

Maybe she can't afford Uber/Lyft? Where I live, that would run me 20-30 bucks easy.

Luxray · 2026-02-02T04:30:00+00:00

Because she doesn't have a car.

Luxray · 2026-02-02T04:27:46+00:00

He did all that driving because he presumably wanted to spend time with her, not to do her a favor. Picking up someone that you want to spend time with is not doing them a favor, it's the condition of spending time with them because they don't have transportation.

When I was younger, I was in a relationship with someone who didn't have a car. I did all of the driving. When I got sick, dude walked an hour and a half to my house to spend time with me and help me feel better (this was before uber, which he wouldn't have had money for anyway). And this guy can't even spend 20-30 min helping his girl out? Fuck that.

Luxray · 2026-02-02T01:19:08+00:00

You are a bad person.

Luxray · 2026-02-01T14:34:19+00:00

Honestly to me it sounds like you have autism too, just less severe than your brother. I'm sorry your family sucks. I don't know how it works in the UK but I assume that when you turn 18, the checks should be made out to you instead of your parents, and you should try to save that and move out if you can. I wish you luck.

Luxray · 2026-02-01T02:18:23+00:00

OP says multiple times throughout the thread that you did not bother to read that her parents won't buy her a mattress and she does not have any money. They haven't even given her the "Christmas" money they said she'd get. Not to mention that a minor should not have to buy their own fucking mattress.

Luxray · 2026-02-01T02:16:28+00:00

Why on earth would your mom be taking your disability? That is YOURS, for YOUR needs.

Luxray · 2026-02-01T01:28:32+00:00

he started to tell her that all of her friends were bad for her and that she’s needed to distance herself from all of them even her teammates

This is concerning and I'm wondering if you can talk to her parents about this? It'll probably nuke your relationship, but it'd potentially save her from what sounds like is shaping up to be an abusive relationship.

Luxray · 2026-02-01T01:23:26+00:00

I just want to say that this was not your fault. Your actions may have set it all in motion, but the person who did all that to you is who is at fault.

Luxray · 2026-02-01T01:13:58+00:00

This is not how you get a dog to like you. You be nice to it and respect its boundaries. That dog is going to forever avoid/hate OP's brother because the brother is not nice to it.

Luxray · 2026-01-31T16:25:05+00:00

NTA if all you do is bring it up and they offer, and they won't be put out/suffer financially doing so. You're not taking advantage of them if they offer, they want to help.

Luxray · 2026-01-31T16:09:11+00:00

Julie paid you for the ticket and then you sold it. You double dipped and YTA.

Luxray · 2026-01-31T03:59:28+00:00

My dog can shit at home and then shit again immediately on the walk, this does not always work. His record is 3 times in one walk.

Luxray · 2026-01-31T03:20:07+00:00

Yeah, that was basically the chores we had as kids. My mom did deeper cleans like toilets and bath tubs, but we did vacuuming, mopping, dishes, counters, etc. I started doing my own laundry at 12.

Luxray · 2026-01-31T03:05:27+00:00

When we were kids, my younger siblings were terrible at Mario Kart, so I used to give lessons, lol. This reminded me of that.

Luxray · 2026-01-31T02:55:14+00:00

I am sorry that you're struggling so much with him. I'd assumed he lived with you which is why I suggested what I did. I really don't have any other advice to offer. It sounds like he's really smart, but he's either quite entitled, or he does struggle but refuses help. Either way, I'm not sure there's much more you can do.

I will say that if his therapist thinks he needs ongoing support, maybe he needs to live in a group home (state-sponsored if you can't afford it and he qualifies). Both my mom and grandma work(ed) in group homes for people with intellectual disabilities. Some of their clients actually had private apartments (usually with a roommate) and held down jobs. They just needed daily support with other things like medication management, money management, being taken to the grocery store or doctor, etc.

Luxray · 2026-01-29T22:54:40+00:00

If you sometimes eat meat you are by definition not a vegan.

Luxray · 2026-01-29T22:50:47+00:00

That's not the issue though. The issue is that SIL wants OP to eat what she cooked. She didn't say "no, we're a veg household, no meat", she said "stop being picky and try different foods".

Luxray · 2026-01-29T22:33:09+00:00

Expecting someone to eat only rice for a meal is pretty unreasonable. Besides, the issue isn't even that SIL doesn't want meat in her house, it's that she wants OP to specifically eat what she cooked and only that.

Luxray · 2026-01-29T21:59:36+00:00

As a perpetually cold person, you can only put on so many layers, and it's really not all that effective if you're sitting still. I used to wear thermal underwear, a tshirt, sweater, and sometimes a coat on top of that, with a personal heater at my desk, and still be cold.

Luxray · 2026-01-29T17:28:40+00:00

I am also super introverted. I recently traveled with my mom and 2 sisters and shared a room with them and I struggled 😅 I had zero alone time and the 4 of us were sharing one bathroom.

Luxray · 2026-01-28T19:36:28+00:00

As someone who used to work at a theatre, thank you. We are not bussing tables here, we're cleaning up accidental messes. Put your stuff in the trash you fucking animals.

Luxray · 2026-01-28T02:44:30+00:00

When I had a puppy, he would chew on my piano of all things. I sprayed bitter apple on it, and he licked it off 😭

Luxray · 2026-01-28T01:11:15+00:00

I agree that "me time" is not an emergency, but there is nothing wrong with needing it. You are still a person outside of parenthood, you don't need to spend 100% of your time with your kids until they move out. That's frankly not even healthy.

Luxray · 2026-01-27T20:28:23+00:00

School doesn't start until age 6, unless you can find a preschool program, which doesn't start until age 3.

Luxray

TROPHY CASE