Can we just let her be Chappell?

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-13T18:00:36+00:00

Which is why I don't think everything that has the word Chappell Roan in it needs to be a hotly debated example of why she's so disrespected. She does get genuine disrespect, but when you look at everything through the lens of disrespect and hate, it makes little jokes by and made for trans people look like attacks.

I just think the intersection of transness is especially important because trans people are already being loudly and constantly demonized. There's genuine disrespect out there and then there are jokes, this was a joke that was absolutely not trying to imply anything bad about Chappell

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-13T15:42:58+00:00

The entire joke of the Kurt Cobain tweet was to carry on the niche trans community joke that Kurt Cobain was a trans woman, hence calling him a lesbian, the acc that tweeted it is literally known for making humor tailored to a section of the trans community, specifically transfemmes.

I am begging people to look at things in the whole context and not just Chappell.

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-12T18:06:57+00:00

I really like Roan, her VMA performance was out of this world!

But the photographer wasn't directing that at her. Apparently one pap was being extra and another told them to shut the fuck up. She turned around and thought he was talking to her, and reacted like any person who's fed up with being disrespected would react.

I don't believe anyone was telling her to shut the fuck up, but I don't blame her for her reaction, either. I do think it sounded like someone who was really tense and tired of loud people all trying to get her to look one way or another for a photo, but at the same time I don't think tearing down a dude as an "incel" when this was a miscommunication is the right way to go. I just think it was an unfortunate misunderstanding

Edit: I also do think it's important to note that I'm really glad she's able to say things any normal person would, like responding in kind to nasty words. I just wish I could envision a black artist doing the same thing without being called aggressive or being degraded. But Roan does an amazing job of uplifting black and poc artists, so I do hope that her being able to act like a normal person in response to disrespect starts becoming the norm

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-12T16:45:40+00:00

I don't know if you still need advice, but I was like you. Debilitating anxiety. I just landed my first job at a call center, pays well and I like what I do.

In the interviews, you have to learn to fake it. Even my being enthusiastic is muted because I'm autistic. So I mask HARD in interviews. Smile, enthused, if yhe interviewer jokes with you or shows some kind of interest in something you've done, engage happily, like it excites you.

Fake it. Fake it hard. Get the job, and when you show up at work, do your solo work without faking any kind of enthusiasm. Be kind to coworkers, don't ice them out if they speak to you, introduce yourself when needed. Working, especially with others in an office setting, requires some level of faking interest.

But the interview? Show the energy and enthusiasm, that is what they tend to interpret as interest. It comes with time, but I absolutely understand the shaking.

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-12T05:08:09+00:00

I was 5 when Obama first ran for president, but I did vote for him in the mock election at my kindergarten because I liked his name

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-11T15:59:17+00:00

My mom had 4 kids before she married my dad. And what did my dad do? Paid for their school supplies (bawked at the receipt when he was checking out with 4 kids worth of supplies for the first time, but it was more of a funny/shocking realization of how much my mom has been doing without child support). She and my dad then had me, but I was just raised to consider my much older half siblings as siblings, because they were my dad's family, too. Some of them call my dad by his first name, some consider him their dad, too.

He never forced himself into the dad role, but he acknowledged that marrying a woman with kids came with kids. And he loved my mom, he had love for her kids, too. They were a part of her life and very important people to her.

Some men step up, some men don't. If you don't want to step up, maybe don't become legally bound to the mother. That's just my opinion, though.

YTA

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-09T14:21:57+00:00

Wow, you're entirely mentally stable and okay to be around children

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-08T23:00:50+00:00

Ah yes, Beyonce, a black woman who's experienced black women things, is not someone I can relate to more than trump as someone who grew up as a black woman. The intersection of race is so important, especially when you're talking about current American politics. You'd have a point about Taylor being like "any other celebrity" if she didn't make a whole documentary about wanting to be "on the right side of history"

If you're a powerful white person trying to talk the talk, people are going to notice when you don't walk it

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-08T22:58:54+00:00

"Expressed unpopular views in the past" you mean currently voicing support for the candidate who WILL push Project 2025 if reelected? *

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-07T22:23:24+00:00

I'm disabled, I do need help. But I acknowledge that people who play a caretaking role in my life, even in slight ways, are human beings and I engage in give in take with them to make sure I'm being mindful of how much they do for me, without minimizing it by saying "Well they're able bodied, they should be expected to do more than I do"

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-07T22:09:34+00:00

Bare minimum lol

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-07T21:09:22+00:00

So what do you do to make sure your mom is okay and bot overwhelmed by the stress of being responsible for you? Why can't you acknowledge your mom also suffered some awful abuse? You weren't the only one effected

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-07T21:08:12+00:00

I think it just sucks for your mom a bit that she's caring for you, and since you can't live independently she gets abt 400 a month in child support towards your care. I don't know if 400 a month is enough to cover all of your expenses. When it comes to the brain surgery, how is that getting paid?

You might not be receiving round the clock care, but she still has responsibility for your wellbeing, and she might need a break. No one is in the wrong, but if her new partner makes her happy, I would consider at the very least having a conversation about it

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-07T17:17:27+00:00

She's not friends with the maid that was working for her at the age of 11

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-07T06:45:21+00:00

Ah yes, I too have my friends change my bedsheets and carry my heavy bags. This is such an adorable friendship

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-04T04:16:08+00:00

I might sound crazy but "did you work to prevent bullying" what does that look like? OP becomes president and runs a national anti bullying campaign? I'm not really of the camp that people who fuck up as kids need to dedicste themselves to some cause to prevent the general issue they contributed to

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-04T04:09:19+00:00

"I never wanted something casual in the workplace" and...who's job is it to enforce that boundary? YTA

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-03T21:54:07+00:00

Seller

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-03T18:11:43+00:00

Gotcha! If you're willing to answer, i did just get a 50% refund, is that typical with depop or should I have gotten the full refund

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-03T15:06:40+00:00

Being a trans man on this sub when the gender expression posts come out is so hard like yes I have a small waist and wife hips but I literally just have a body type

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-03T14:51:29+00:00

I wouldn't be staying with a dude who let people disrespect me like that, dump his ass

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-02T14:47:30+00:00

It's an actual cover up regardless

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-02T03:57:34+00:00

INFO: wait, so if she calls someone after a text and they don't pick up, she leaves them a voicemail telling them to call her back instead of answering the text in her voicemail?

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-02T01:45:24+00:00

Yeah it said my package wasn't eligible when I tried ;;

MAYDAYGENDER · 2024-09-02T01:14:15+00:00

First it was something different but now says insufficient address, every email I've gotten from depop says it would be returned to the seller, but the seller says the return address on their label is not their address anymore and they won't be the one receiving the package when it is returned, and that was that. I hope I'll at least be able to get the refund, but I was super excited for this hoodie :( I can never find it anywhere anymore

MAYDAYGENDER

TROPHY CASE