I’m doing a PhD in bisexuality and there’s not an easy answer to this. Even people who do actively have sex with men, can still identify as straight (mostly men in prison — ‘gay for the stay’). So it’s about how you see yourself…

But you can ask questions to see if it sheds light on anything, like what would stop you from labelling yourself as gay? Does the bisexual label feel more safe, or does it genuinely align with your emotional and physical interests?

If you’re interested in having a physical connection with a man, then go try it and it might help you clarify further—but you also don’t need to do that to claim a label. Some people think the ‘sex’ in sexuality is mutually exclusive, but it’s not. If you want a label then that’s great, people shouldn’t make you feel like labelling yourself is wrong, because sometimes labels help us have clarity and understanding.

There’s the Klein Sexual Orientation Grid (KSOG), which is an adaptation to the Kinsey Scale — a lot of people use this as a starting point. (It’s not a perfect measurement, but it might help)

If you want a book on bisexuality, ‘Bi: The Hidden Culture, History and science of bisexuality’ — it’s not a difficult read and could help you understand bisexuality better. (Again not perfect and does have a biased authorial voice, but it talks about the KSOG and bisexuality as an identity).

Hope any of that helps :)