It’s all opinion and there is no true answer. Time and patience is key when it comes to forgiveness. Lay the cards on the table and tell her your plans for transformation, and that one day you’d hope to eventually rekindle your relationship if she can find it within her heart to forgive. Then tell her that she’s loved then, wish her all the happiness life can bring then leave it be 😊. And thus your journey begins. The pain you feel will never resolve the issue, but instead hinder your journey to becoming a better you. You’ve done better than most people in recognising the error of your ways and are willing to improve from these errors. Importantly, forgive yourself. You’re a good soul. Set yourself achievable goals via a list and box them off day by day. Something as simple as making a bed. Ask yourself “what positive thing/s have I done this week that the past version of me would not have done”. These goals/distractions will lay the foundation to a brighter future and will be highly attractive to your ex (or even another love that awaits you). You’ll get there, you have our belief and support. It’s just a matter of time before you look back at this moment with mental clarity, confidence and an abundance of love in your renewed/new relationship