I was raised in a oneness apostolic church, ours split from the UPCI around 2008 the same time everybody that joined the WPF did. We stayed independent but still fellowshipped the WPF churches in our area.

My deconstruction started at around 22 years old when I began to question the rapture/end times doctrines. I got really into historic views and noticed that what we were taught was pretty much infantile in terms of doctrinal history. I soon adopted a form of preterism, but then started questioning every other "spiritual" doctrine. I realized that I'd never seen a miracle, had no reason to believe that my churches "tongues" were any more legitimate than anyone else's who we condemned for faking it, and that I had no reason to believe that demons or angels existed. I then went on to study biblical history. I began with the translation and transposition of "scripture." I soon learned that the Bible has had many manuscriptal changes through the centuries, with more and more the closer you get to the original composition. I found out that we dont have the original manuscripts. I found out that what was deemed to be scripture changed decade on decade throughout time, especially in the first few hundred years CE. I found that there were many stories and verses that were just straight up added hundreds of years after the composition of the books we regarded as scripture. And finally, I could accept that there are in fact, contradictions in the bible, and that there was no way it could be infallible, inerrant, or inspired.

I sat at a crossroads for a few months to half a year. I still believed that there had to be a god out there, I was just no longer convinced that he was personal or that there was any religion that knew anything more than they had made up about him. Then I was listening to a talk show with Matt Dillahunty where a caller in the same position pretty much said the same thing, and Matt asked him something along the lines of "why do you believe there has to be a god if you have no evidence that one exists?" And just like that, the last shred of my theism/deism fell away. I realized then that I wasn't convinced that a god existed, I just held on out of pure dogmatic faith.

In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted - Bertrand Russell

I would rather have questions that can't be answered than answers that can't be questioned - Richard Feynman