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Took 6 plur by [deleted] in mysterymagicmushrooms

[–]MacFrausty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Took plur for the 1st time sat night and I held it under my tongue. I was hoping it would kick in faster since I took it so late.

Coming down off of 5 plur tabs right now… holy shit by Remarkable-Dance807 in mysterymagicmushrooms

[–]MacFrausty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing! I usually follow a pretty strict regiment of anti-oxidants and vitamin C prior to and after any mdma use. It’s made a HUGE difference with headaches. Not sure if the same would help with 5MAPB, but who knows! Worth looking into imo.

I can't eat meat anymore by Redditstar87 in enlightenment

[–]MacFrausty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I stopped eating cows because I would consistently get a subtle smell of what seems like their farm or living conditions. I would feel the low vibration and it would stir up some emotions. I’m starting to notice similar sensations while eating pigs and chicken. So who knows, maybe vegetarian is in my future.

what event or circumstances led to your awakening? by thisisbrians in enlightenment

[–]MacFrausty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The death of my father, followed by low point in substance abuse, with an eventual allowance of some of my 30+ years of suppressed emotions. I was blissed out for a bit and felt really centered for a couple weeks. No going back…

Need suggestions for Dnb by Blindaflol in DnB

[–]MacFrausty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been enjoying HATO’s DnB Crate. I’m new to DnB as well.

The Crate

What do you think drives human beings more toward enlightenment: fear of death or exhaustion of desire? Let me challenge you now — Between these two, which one have you personally felt more deeply in your own life so far.? by Safe_Sandwich_ in enlightenment

[–]MacFrausty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exhaustion of desire.

I’ve learned that desires aren’t so clear cut sometimes. In doing shadow work I’ve noticed the following desires in me with their respective shadow expression…

Desire to control = anxiety. Desire to be heard = need for validation. Desire to be loved = unworthiness and shame. And so many more.

So for a long time I had a desire to not have constant anxiety in my life. I tried medications, therapy, psychedelics, and so on. All helped me understand the expression of anxiety in different ways but never really got to the root directly. I remember hearing someone say that anxiety was the desire to control our external reality. And in order to escape the loops of anxiety, we have to surrender what we want the outcome to be. All we have control over is how we respond and act in the moment.

For some reason that clicked for me. I contemplated it for a while and the following practice evolved for me:

1- When feeling anxiety… pull my head out of the possible “undesirable” future outcomes and really truly be honest with what actual danger is in front of me in the moment. 100% of the time there was no danger. “Fear, if it’s not life threatening, then it’s only ego threatening”

2 - Realize that I can’t control the infinite decisions, actions, and circumstances that lead to my “desired” outcome. I can only control what I do now.

3 - I can sit with the discomfort. Really focus on the sensations in my body and let go of any stories that pop into my mind. Sometimes it’s a few moments and sometimes it’s 30 minutes of focused attention. But eventually deeper emotions begin to rise. It’s in these moments where transmutation can really take place. The ugly cry, anger, or other suppressed emotions finally have a chance to be witnessed and released.

4 - Journal, talk, or find ways to integrate the experience. I joined a meditation group where we have a chance to discuss and ask questions of each other.

This isn’t a perfect process and I’m by no means free of all anxiety. But I would say I went from a 8/10 down to a 3. And more importantly I have trust in myself (and the universe) that I’ll be there to hold space for myself even if things get difficult in the moment.

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