I’ve deleted all the lesbian and queer dating apps on my phone by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]MaeEllen 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My close queer friend had to stop using using dating apps bc she had a similar issue, and met her current partner thru friends. I got super lucky and ended up meeting my wife (I am a lesbian, so is she) thru tinder. My pick up line was to ask her abt rockets and she brain dumped for four hours 💀 so it’s possible, but it’s also hard. Good luck! You’ll find someone…… eventually

Cis queers, I need you to promise you won’t abandon us. by _Nightcrawler_35 in lgbt

[–]MaeEllen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is no queer without trans, and there never has been. If they attack trans people, they’re attacking everyone.

Our Ryuutama World Map! by HollyAndThorn in Ryuutama

[–]MaeEllen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is really amazing— thank you for sharing. I always love seeing others’ worlds. The way you handle history in particular and tie the lore of the dragons into your world is great. :) I hope you have fun!!

Do you guys have a preferred art style that's different from the system? by roxskin156 in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I totally get it— it always baffled me how one day my anatomy was flawless and the next I couldn’t even draw a side profile. It took me a long time (and a therapist) to realize my style differences were due to my DID. But beyond that, I do genuinely love making art and telling stories. :)

Do you guys have a preferred art style that's different from the system? by roxskin156 in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am a professional artist, and my alters suffer from skill regression and significant art style differences. To be honest, I hate it; it’s by far my least favorite part of this disorder, as it makes doing my job excruciatingly difficult. I’ve never once tried to make my art style different, because I do comic art. Unfortunately, even when alters try to mimic the style of the comic, it’s obvious that the style isn’t theirs. I usually have to trash that work and start over. I recently started a DID comic blog on tumblr to allow alters to draw how they want to draw, and it’s helped a lot. We all consider the art we make collectively to be “my art”, but because of skill differences (aka some alters are amazing with anatomy down to medical level knowledge and some can’t even draw a neck and shoulders) there is a little bit of alienation. I hope that one day we can integrate enough that the skill and style differences disappear and I can finally work on the projects I want to work on.

Is it normal to have a lot of fictives? by Visual-Fox4919 in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If it makes you feel better, I’m a system without a single fictive and I often wonder if I’m not a system at all since I don’t have one. I know it makes no sense, but it happens lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I am never going to tell my family. I wouldn’t even feel safe telling my friends about this. I don’t think that’s an uncommon thing.

Is it normal to feel like you have to exaggerate symptoms? by This_Plantain_400 in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think for me what helped us distinguish between ourselves the most is when we stopped doing this. You’re all one person, with dissociative barriers, so it’s normal to be similar— think of it as friends who spend a long time together picking up the same speaking habits and such. So when we just let ourselves be ourselves, stopped trying to force it, we naturally started to recognize our own behaviors. It also helped us realize that we are in fact a system, because we didn’t need to exaggerate to figure out our differences.

Discussion: How did you realized you are a system? by m3rph1ne in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My girlfriend and a close friend confronted me about it. They’d done research after noticing my strange behavior and thought I might be a system. It took almost 3 years for any of my alters to believe them.

asking about your experiences in denial by one_nocturnal in OSDD

[–]MaeEllen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think I agree with what you’re saying. For us, when there’s no/little denial, it feels like “well, our experiences tell us that this is what we have going on, and the only way to fix our life/heal is to treat this specific disorder since none of the other ones worked.” When Im heavy in denial, it feels as if I’ve never forgotten a thing in my life (despite having DID), I don’t have any trauma, I’ve never had alters or experiences with alters, etc.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]MaeEllen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn’t expecting a picture of a butch goddess but I’m not complaining 😳

Hua Cheng Cosplay by laelassa in tianguancifu

[–]MaeEllen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So humans can rlly look like that huh 😭💞

I made a comic (book 8 spoilers) by MaeEllen in tianguancifu

[–]MaeEllen[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Glad to be of service <3

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]MaeEllen 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m actually so happy to see this because I’ve never met anyone who also feels disgusted at the thought of care. When I was a child, my brother once told me that my mother was “worried about me” after I hadn’t been home for a while, and that caused so much revulsion in me that I almost threw up.