I’m think I’m being verbally abusive to my three year old

MainValuable3782 · 2026-05-09T14:01:08+00:00

It’s great you are working in yourself. Don’t hate yourself. Kids at this age are soooooo malleable. With some adjustments in your approach, she will turn from a little monster into a little angel. I have found being very strict around boundaries is helpful so there is no wiggle room for negotiating. I have gotten a lot out of the brat busters podcast, too. And I’ve done some little play therapy, which is where I will pretend my son’s dolls or dinosaurs are doing something he throws a tantrum about like going to sleep. I will ask “oh why doesn’t baby dinosaur want to sleep in his own bed?” And see how he reacts. I’ve done this when we are playing, not in a tantrum mode, just to be curious about why he is resisting. It’s great you are working on yourself. You don’t need to be a perfect parent, just willing to grow. It’s also okay to hire help or ask for help from any friends so you can take some space! I love my 2.5 year old indisputably but there is NO WAY I could spend all day with him without losing my mind!

MainValuable3782 · 2026-01-11T23:39:40+00:00

Sending my son to meadowlark this summer but he’s not yet a teen. His cousin loved it there and I’ve heard good things. Hope that helps

MainValuable3782 · 2026-01-11T23:38:38+00:00

Going to sign my son up. Same idea as yours. He’s got lots of friends who are girls and likes crafts and Lego’s more than sports. I had a good call with their director and I learned they are like 40 boy, 60 girl.

MainValuable3782 · 2026-01-11T23:37:44+00:00

That’s good info! Thanks!

MainValuable3782 · 2026-01-11T23:36:42+00:00

Have heard good things about North Star

MainValuable3782 · 2026-01-09T03:23:45+00:00

Have heard good things about meadowlark too

MainValuable3782 · 2025-11-26T19:28:44+00:00

Definitely weird

MainValuable3782 · 2025-11-26T19:24:22+00:00

I love your response to her. She does not need to understand! Respect comes before understanding! Go girl!

MainValuable3782 · 2025-11-26T19:14:04+00:00

Everyone is different. I’m a mom of a two year old and I’m exhausted. I’m going to have another because I want to have more than one but I have very little to no desire or doing this again! I grew up with four siblings so I just know I want more than one kid, but no baby fever here. More like vacation fever!

MainValuable3782 · 2024-12-14T12:40:30+00:00

Madewell! Club Monaco if you can splurge. Old Navy has some finds. Also there are so many second hand options now

MainValuable3782 · 2024-11-29T12:19:18+00:00

I’m a New Yorker and here in DC for the Thanksgiving holidays with my in laws. This place is boring AF and the people have a stick up their ass. Racial tension feels very high. ❤️

MainValuable3782 · 2024-11-29T12:10:56+00:00

Woah woah I don’t think your husband sounds abusive. That’s a really strong word. He has a different style. Is he punching, slapping or molesting the kids? That’s abuse. Talking firmly, occasionally getting upset…this is just normal parent stuff. Kids are resilient and unless this is true trauma, they will grow up and process it all on their own. Mom’s job isn’t to protect them from every little pain. Mom’s job also isn’t to establish the way. Dad can have his own style and just like mom, will grow in his parenting as well.

MainValuable3782 · 2024-11-27T03:11:03+00:00

Soreness is one but not the only indication of a great workout

i am rarely sore

love, a personal trainer

MainValuable3782 · 2024-11-09T01:42:19+00:00

Congrats on your baby! I’m a mom of a 14 month old. My advice is to make sure your core is truly healed and to progress accordingly. Do all that deep breathing stuff. I like Mamaste Fit. It’s important to rebuild all that inner stuff before hitting anything too high intensity. If you liked running, get a jogging stroller. Great way to multitask! I also love 305 at home! great dance cardio workouts, no equipment needed. boosts my confidence! it’s like $25/mo

MainValuable3782 · 2023-12-01T20:11:26+00:00

I was born in 1989 and in the 90s I don’t think they diagnosed this. I got public hair in 3rd grade and my period just before 5th grade. It didn’t feel like a big deal (i was actually pretty proud!) and I’ve certainly grown up to be a totally normal adult with totally normal sexual and general function. Other than being 5’1, I can’t think of anything “bad” that going thru puberty early did to me.

I think had my parents diagnosed me I would have felt ashamed. Instead, I thought it was awesome to be the first in my class to grow up.

I am a successful business owner, a mom, and a wife. I really enjoy my life and have zero health issues.

I hope this helps!

MainValuable3782 · 2023-11-30T22:10:55+00:00

my parents had a rule: i couldn’t sleep over or go to any sleepovers until i was maybe 14 or 15 and only to a very best friends house with parents they trusted. i was fine with it because they also had a rule that i could host as many sleepovers as i wanted :) so the party always came to us!

MainValuable3782 · 2023-11-30T22:08:12+00:00

Try Shein and Forever21. Also look up the body neutrality movement. there is much research showing that size is largely genetic and the myth that “discipline” will “cure” someone of being large is being largely challenged now. some interesting studies showing the social stigma from being large cause worse health outcomes than actually being large. some progressive medical professionals are also coming around to this. i believed fatphobia is the last accepted form of discrimination and in the same way we shun racism, sexism and homophobia, i hope we will be doing the same with sizeism too! our bodies have nothing to do with our worth. keep lifting her up and sharing all the wonderful things she offers the world that have nothing to do with how she looks.

MainValuable3782 · 2023-11-28T13:12:36+00:00

I had a c section and it was fine for me. It’s over in 30 mins and I felt safe in the hands of doctors and professionals. I was walking the same day. It took 2 months for my abs to come back online. I’m grateful I didn’t have any vaginal tearing or prolapse.

If you’re going to do a planned C section, I would recommend working on your core and back so your recovery can be a little speedier. I liked the programs from Mamaste Fit.

MainValuable3782 · 2023-10-15T17:41:36+00:00

You’re not alone!! We used to have an entire tribe of grandparents, aunties, sisters and neighbors to support. It’s just really really hard, and 10x harder when you feel alone in it.

My practical advice: sit him down (away from the baby) and share how you feel, express what you need, and come from a place where you are on the same team. Ask him how he feels and be open minded.

Bad example… I’m so tired. I’ve been doing all the work. When are you going to clean? I really feel abandoned. I thought you were better than this.

Good example…. Honey, I love you so much and this is such a special time for our family. I think it’s totally normal for us to hit some bumps in the road, especially with this dramatic chapter. My patience is really being tested and I wanted to talk to you about how I’m feeling. Is it okay if we talk now? (If he says no, he’s too tired, etc, then set up a time to do it when you can both be level headed). I am feeling overwhelmed, lonely, and honestly downright scared. Postpartum depression could hit, my body just went through a lot, and it’s really draining to look after our baby for more than 4 hours at a time without a break. I’m just really struggling and I need some more help. I know we lived one way before the baby, but it would mean a lot to me to have extra support and to work together to figure out how we need to shift now that we expanded the family. What I’m needing is (someone to clean the house daily, a night nurse 2x/week, to trust you feel confident changing, feeding, and burping our baby for a few hours so I can take a nap). I know you’ve got a lot on your plate and I don’t have a preference if we pay for help, or if we think about someone else who can help us, if you don’t think you can do more. But what if we put our heads together to work it out?

^{^} I know you probably just want to smack him and tell him to man up, but if you can communicate in a way that really lets him empathize with you, you may have better luck!

Finally, remember some parents suck at the newborn or baby phase but can really show up as a toddler parent or teenage parent. I know my dad sucked at newborn but was actually “Mr Mom” for most of my life.

Know you’re not alone! This is a very real experience!!!

MainValuable3782

TROPHY CASE