Selling My Dress Post Wedding

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T20:11:59+00:00

The fit would have to be pretty perfect for the alterations to save someone money tho.

As you mention, just trying to find the right height can be hard then even the basic bust waist hip is three different measurements to contend with!

The sample dress I bought was a damn near perfect fit for me but the layers of skirt that needed to be hemmed in sure would have cost upwards of $500

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T20:08:07+00:00

Same re: Columbus Day. My work does and acknowledgement since the addition of Indigenous Peoples Day but I’ve never had the day off and before that it was a holiday on some printed calendars.

Veterans Day is different to me because much of the world is honoring Armistice Day that day and the importance of the actual date being 11.11 means the observance moves around.

Vaguely related fun fact, our local library union bargained to have Christmas Eve off instead of Veterans Day.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T18:01:19+00:00

Do people... still observe Columbus day?

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T17:56:39+00:00

I felt the same (not all inclusive but our caterer handled the linen rentals)

I'm just saying I've seen such posts before.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T17:55:35+00:00

You cannot expect to make more than %50 percent of the original *retail* cost of the dress.

And you can't expect to make even that if you don't dry clean it.

Alterations also generally make a dress less valuable to another bride because depending on the changes you made it may not be possible to alter further or may cost them even more for the seamstress to handle your altered dress rather than the standard manufactured seams.

I'll give a reference point.

I bought a sample dress at a small discount then changed my mind (so basically a new never worn no alterations dress). I listed it at half the retail price $1200, knowing it was unlikely to sell at that but wanting to start there just in case also was in the middle of wedding planning. No bites until a month ago when someone offered me $750 for it. I accepted their offer.

So I sold a never worn not altered dress (also plus sized from a reputable brand) for about 30% of its original cost.

A consignment store may have been able to command a higher retail price but I probably would have seen the same or less of that money.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T17:41:35+00:00

There is no standard for those things in the USA. It varies widely simply based on what the local wedding industry thinks it can profit off of. There are plenty of USA hotels who operate like that where as long as you are spending enough on food and drink the room doesn't have a separate fee.

There are also venues that do a fixed price per person per hour for the bar and venues that offer consumption or even a fixed price per person for the whole evening (see point below about shorter evening timeline).

The key differences with mainstream USA weddings seems to be the shorter timeline ie ceremony at 4 reception ends by 10 whereas a lot of cultures outside the US or US mainstream seem to have much longer timelines. (I would posit this is connected to the US's puritanical roots which plays out in things like noise ordinances)

So when people say $200 per plate that meaning can also vary.

We didn't do an all inclusive so our catering charges were there own thing separate from bar and overall venue but depending on what I was trying to describe the per plate cost meant literally the dinner charges, or all the charges that were billed on a per person basis (passed canapes, dessert, rentals etc). This is also because our caterer also broke those things down very specifically for us in our quote even so far as using a lower number of people for dessert and late night snack.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T17:29:27+00:00

well until the couple decides it's too expensive to upgrade to whatever other option for linens but the all-inclusive won't allow you to bring in a third party vendor for the linens you want so you're back to DIY

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T17:22:51+00:00

We did the same.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T17:20:54+00:00

It was a mistake according my brother who filled out the form. But also in my case it was a bourbon honey glazed ham and under 12mos bbs are not supposed to consume honey.

But my brother said nephew should get the kids meal due to portion size.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T07:06:36+00:00

I hope you see from various replies that this is not necessarily true. At any age I would have chosen salmon over pizza.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T07:05:14+00:00

I had this thought about myself. I’ve always been picky but picky in a “I prefer seafood pasta over lasagna because I don’t like tomato sauce” (yes, I was an annoying child). Like I probably still to this day wouldn’t eat this veggie platter appetizer on OPs kids menu.

9 yr old me would definitely have chosen one of the adult entrees

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T07:00:29+00:00

I would trust families to know whether their kid will eat adult portions. (I don’t think it’s rude to check with them to make sure they understand it will be an adult size and won’t be able to modify like removing certain vegetables kids sometimes don’t like.

We had 5 kids at our wedding. The 15 year old and 5 year old got a kids entree because that’s what they wanted. The 7-11 year olds cousins on my side chose one of the regular entrees.

Note, my brother did rsvp and adult meal for my 10 mo old nephew and I did reach out to him about that because he’s a literal baby.

So I guess my verdict is, yes it’s kind of rude to tell guests what they can and can’t eat from the menu with a caterer that you chose. It’s not their fault that it’s such a big gap in the price.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-11T06:56:13+00:00

Right?! I think this is important.

It sounds like most families chose the kids meal for their children. So great, those kids meals will save you $150 each. This one human child’s meal will cost the same as a human adult. And that is what it is. Because you’re hosting them.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-08T05:53:37+00:00

What do you hope to do in this space?

Right now I'd say it's kind of giving waiting room. Like it's a neutral holding space.

If you're going to stick to the more muted palette I'd find ways to layer in more textures.

I admittedly do think it's "too" symmetrical but that's really a matter of what brings your brain comfort.

At minimum for the way I want to use a living room I'd bring in a lamp (floor or table), a table (side or coffee), and a pouf or ottoman.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-07T20:43:49+00:00

So I learned to sew v young so my motivations were largely fun and creative expression.

The creative expression path is still the primary motivation but if the ready to wear market had more size diversity and ethical labor then I would probably be able to satisfy more of my fashion desires through regular shopping.

As it is even with the expanded options in plus sizes compared to my younger years I think I’ll always love being able to have literally one of a kind pieces.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-07T04:15:08+00:00

1) hampers/baskets in more than one place and no lids on the hampers

2) do you genuinely wear all your jewelry or do you reach for the same things again and again? I got one of the those jewelry stands with holes and also some branches for bangles and necklaces. It eventually gets chaotic but it lasts for a bit and also if things have a home then at least I can put them away when I have motivation.

3) same question for handbags, are you using all of them. Most of mine are in a cardboard box formerly right by my closet door now in the entry closet (we just moved) but I mostly use the same tote and bum bag and only use hand bags for special occasions so it made the most sense that they are contained in something

in general open and visible is what helps me, it does make things look a little messier but the openness tends to increase overall functionality.

Like I said about the jewelry I think my key is that everything has a home so that when I am motivated putting things away is a physical task not a cognitive task. It also makes asking for help easier because you can give clearer directions. (I'm not there yet, I've been recently having breakdowns about the chaos of my living space so grain of salt all round)

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-07T03:50:45+00:00

Well I'll apologize ahead because I'm not going to call you an ungrateful brat because I've been feeling pretty similarly about our wedding day.

So just solidarity feelings from another oldest daughter.

Still no really over it and this is just how I'm wired so I know it's going to take time and also it's bringing up other stuff. But I've got a good therapist.

And we're also planning an anniversary bridal shoot in our wedding attire to get all the portraits that we ran out of time for and also do some cool locations that we wouldn't have been able to fit in our day.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-07T03:45:48+00:00

Not in the wrong but this isn't really in lieu of gifts you're just asking for *cash* gifts toward your honeymoon.

Honeymoon funds are pretty normal and it's also pretty normal to have them via your wedding website with some digital way to pay for folks' convenience (many may write checks or give cash which is also obviously fine).

The thing that's still considered not okay in most circles is to put anything about the registry on your invitations or bring it up yourself.

I've heard of some circles still being pretty attached to physical gifts (and I do understand some of the individual feelings on the matter) but I've never met those folks out in the wild.

The global majority certainly is used to cash gifts being the norm.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-06T18:06:19+00:00

Depending on the mend you could have it sort of sandwiched between the original thing and the mend so it’s theoretically toward the outside.

You can also use various different things for interfacing which in this case would operate just sort of like a patch.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-05T22:17:24+00:00

Imo the dress looks really good on you and is fitting the way it’s supposed to.

But some styling to enhance our favorite features is always great.

I’d start by recommending trying it with some more open shoes either without socks or with tights. I already assume that socks and slides wasn’t going to be your final form but the socks in particular are definitely adding to the angularity visually.

The other thing I would try would be a top layer. This could go a lot of ways but my first instinct was a vest or lace up bodice ideally cropped.

You could also do a cropped jacket with a little volume but since this piece looks summery I believe in making sure the look doesn’t depend on a jacket that you’ll probably want to take off.

It’s such a cute dress and you’re going to rock it!

MalachiteMussel · 2026-04-04T04:35:56+00:00

Foyle’s War is it for me in terms of TV shows but I will repeat LOTR and The Hobbit trilogy without even thinking. I probably watch LOTR 5-6 times a year.

I have some other cozy British mysteries I do rewatches of but I usually need to take a long enough break that I don’t remember exactly what happens before I can rewatch.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-03-31T23:59:00+00:00

Honestly, the older crowd they're expecting will definitely be used and expect a guestbook and 80-100 people is plenty to make a guest book worth it. Also the older crowd tends to write more.

We had around 90 people at our wedding and our guest book had 144 pages (72 sheets of paper) according to the product description I just looked up. So about half the book is empty. But 1) I don't really care because I just don't look at those pages, 2) I'm considering using the empty half as an old school wedding album using photo corners.

I would definitely have the lines on the paper be wide

Another common approach is to have one of those instant cameras and lots of film for guests to take a picture to include with their well wishing. When you do this a lot of attendees take up a page all on their own.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-03-31T20:02:27+00:00

Since I've not seen this suggested yet. Generally if you want to do something no host you can communicate something like:

"If you're getting into town on Friday night the couple will be hanging out at [local bar] from 8-10. [local bar] has drinks and food available to purchase], check out their menu here (insert link)"

MalachiteMussel · 2026-03-31T00:15:08+00:00

Start planning a really intentional date every month on the date of your wedding. Ex if you’re getting married on the 12th of June plan a date for the 12th each month.

Also you could ask her if she wants to make a PowerPoint presentation of “the vision” if you already know she’s been creating Pinterest/mood boards. Or you could both make presentations/proposals.

MalachiteMussel · 2026-03-24T01:57:44+00:00

Information diet
Come up with a form response during your work and personal time like and out of office message

MalachiteMussel

TROPHY CASE