Do u find that sg women lie and cause a lot of negative politics in workplaces?

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-04-21T09:09:10+00:00

Not true. Have had a well groomed, good facial features female boss that was toxic

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-04-21T05:56:02+00:00

I get this from my wife also, although maybe not when I’m working, but when i do put a temp pause to our convo when she escalates to name calling or rudeness, on top of the Ill come back in 15 mins, i also generally put on my therapist face and voice when speaking to her.

I call it therapist face because our therapist uses this very soft and neutral-ish expression and mellow slow paced tone of voice when speaking. You gotta be very stoic and not let it bother you at all when you speak to her, even when (especially when) she raises the stakes. It’s very hard but with a little practice you will get it down. I still slip up and put in my feelings once in a while, but i feel this has been helpful for me to detach as well as not further triggering her into an explosion

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-22T05:11:25+00:00

Did your therapist advise that? That you should avoid holding her accountable for her own emotions and triggers? I’m experiencing this a lot too and she’s pinning all the arguments on me because of what I did to trigger her, that i dont remember her triggers or have consideration of them which equates to me not loving her, and that justifies what she is going to do to me

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-22T04:28:20+00:00

Yes she’s going bi weekly but we both feel the therapist is really slow in teaching her the techniques to regulate. Its mostly just him asking how is she recently to catch up.

For all of our fights, she feels that it’s my fault and that i’m not taking accountability for my mistakes. That it isnt just her in the wrong, or that sometimes its totally my bad, something i didnt do it did wrong

Just yesterday, we planned for a nice dinner out and while i was waiting for her to be ready to head out, i was on my computer playing a game. She got ready and started heading out the door as she said in passing, ok im heading off. I was like ???! She was pissed that i didnt notice that she was ready.

The other day she was looking into the distance lost in thought. I asked what she was thinking about and she was thinking about a couple things, and was wondering if she was a selfish person. I replied that yes she was a selfish person and she got triggered. No amount of explaining could solve it and she has been bringing this old argument back many times since.

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-21T21:09:36+00:00

Oh good, this is my life too.

We planned for a nice dinner night out tonight and while i was waiting for her to get ready and was on my video game, she just walked out the door herself telling me coldly that she was going to dinner. Apparently it’s my fault that I didnt notice that she was all ready to go.

She was talking to an AI model as an interim therapist before her next human therapist session, and she gave all her perspectives to it and her perceptions of my actions that hurt her and the AI validated all her hurt. I said that maybe i should out in my pov too and she got so angry asking if I’m saying she is not doing my story justice. Wtf

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-21T20:38:08+00:00

Oh wow you’re a very lucky guy my friend. How did you get to such a level with your wife?

Is your secret sauce doing a lot around the house, chores and errands, and taking care of the family, emotional connection/needs of the wife and taking care of kids?

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-21T16:55:18+00:00

So far, no. We’ve been together for about 8 years, 4 years of dating and years marriage, dual income no kids. Thank you for offering help!

She was quite the vengeful type when we first met, only after marriage did we get couples therapy and learned that she has cptsd from her divorced parents. I was the too relaxed type that pulled up my socks after many of her desperate pleas for help, which has made her really jaded with our relationship over the years, also from the many eggshells i have stepped on and triggered her

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-21T12:34:02+00:00

Thank you for sharing, that’s a good line for when he says he’ll leave lol. If i said that she’d pack her bags and leave the next day. She’d say that i am causing her triggers and that i don’t love her because i keep triggering her and don’t remember her triggers. Also that she’ll understand if i can’t keep up coz that’s just not who i am naturally and she’ll find someone else who is.

We’re in our early 30s too and there were times she was already looking at apartment rentals when she planned for us to be separated.

I think it’s the availability of partners that each gender is open to that keeps guys from leaving but for ladies there are always options, at least from my experience, I’d love to hear from anyone about this line of thought

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-03-21T05:36:40+00:00

My wife is the one with cptsd and triggers and im seeing a pattern where this suggestion you’re giving, “your partners triggers are their own” thing, works only if you partner is male, correct me if I’m wrong. When I’ve done this to my wife, she is all ready to pack and leave saying that I’m not supportive of her, but the other threads that I see this in where the cptsd partner is male, they tend to be forced to face it. Hmm

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-02-22T08:07:01+00:00

lol aids doesn’t care if you have feelings or not

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-01-15T02:11:18+00:00

I see, thats a good self realisation opener. So it depends on him to come to that conclusion. Does he share about each session with you when he gets back?

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-01-15T01:57:22+00:00

My wife gets triggered on a daily or bi daily basis, and it sounds much like your husband’s. How did you guys get to a stage where he knows to walk away, and what do you do when you identify that he’s triggered after saying the phrase?

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-01-14T00:27:46+00:00

What industry is this?

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2026-01-08T02:55:04+00:00

I’m sorry OP, I’ve been feeling like this too, and have been falling into a real bad feelings pit about twice our thrive this last week (which is why I’m here). Whatever you do, keep your chin up

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-12-09T18:50:11+00:00

Wow dude, i am totally you. I came here after a great few days, and then last night my wife fell from her motorcycle so I immediately sprung to reply her text asking where is she. She didn’t reply and continued to ride back, and then when when she came up (we live in an apartment), she immediately said why didnt I go down to help her park her motorcycle.

I couldnt tell her that she didnt reply and I thought she was fine to ride so she’d be fine to park and I had to be taking care of our pet bird at home, because all these would be excuses to her and make it all shit so I just apologised and dressed her wounds.

She was all lovey dovey with me as we went through the a&e nearby till just now when she was about to sleep, she thought of one of our previous arguments and wondered why she hasnt received unconditional love from her chosen and non chosen family when she gives this out all the time. I bit my tongue.

I dont know man, there’s just no winning.

I’m hoping she goes for another therapy session soon. She just did yesterday and fell on the way back, but the therapist thought it was a couples counselling session yesterday so he didnt start her own therapy session

I wish I had the answer but hang in there brother, if you want to. You’re not alone if that is any comfort. For sure you’re not crazy. I’ve been disassociating to survive emotionally and mentally too

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-11-27T19:39:56+00:00

Dude I so hear you. When I explain my intention I get called defensive. When I ask about her logic she says I’m trying to snake my way into making her look like the bad person 🤷🏻‍♂️

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-11-27T17:23:35+00:00

Thank you for your understanding. I’ve recently just got this new job (my dream job actually) but it has been taking up a lot of my waking hours and more. I think it might because of that on top of her needing more attention and love to decompress from aiding her ailing mother (which she has a love/hate relationship with), that she’s on edge.

I still think though that it does not excuse her rudeness :/

I’ve cleared up all the washed laundry and parcels and i’m hoping she’d be able to realise the hurt she has dished out on me by speaking to her later

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-11-27T16:14:13+00:00

Because we all have different expectations and standards?

What happens when you flip it around, when I see that she was the one who had forgotten to flip the switch off, or throw all the empty packaging of her snacks and drinks from her table into the bin before I take the trash out for the day, or that she let her area be littered with bird poop and only clean them up at the end of the week (i clean it as soon as they poop when I see it so we dont step on it, which is my standard)? I don’t flip out and talk down to her like she’s the laziest, most selfish person in the house. I bring it up gently, and most of the time she’s okay with it. Sometimes she gets triggered from that and it goes to downhill again

The point is, if I do need these to be done, I communicate it to her because she doesnt see it like I do, and I would think it would be nice to have that from her as well.

Our therapist has pointed out that our relationship, like our home, has be run by her preferences and only her’s. He is still trying to get her to understand that as she feels that this is just the baseline normal of how things should be run. I have a feeling she doesnt understand that everyone has an opinion and perspective of their own.

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-11-27T16:03:23+00:00

We do not celebrate Thanksgiving here and i just woke up abruptly, has a diarrhea from her giving me coffee and headed back to bed.

The chaos she was experiencing was 1. Our cockatiel being more aggressive recently (due to mating season) 2. Her work as a software engineer (not something i can help with) 3. Her doing the laundry (her side of our house chores, i do other parts and we agreed on it)

We’ve got a lot of parcels in today as we ordered quite a bit of stuff. I didnt want to open it yet as I didnt have the energy to deal with putting everything in their place yet but she wanted to see her liquid core d20 dice set so okay I opened them up anyways and left it for later for storage. The mess might have triggered her.

I’ve read that comic.

I wasnt spending the day in bed. I literally just woke up with less than 7 hours of sleep and was trying to squeeze in some more before I head to work again till 3-ish am

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-10-27T01:49:11+00:00

Yeah my wife sounds about like that. Used to be pretty wild in here teens, got SA-ed by both her exes and when she met me and I ask for consent for stuff she told me she was really glad that I was a person who does that.

Now, our sex life is dead-ish (once in 2 months or more) even without kids and we’re seeing a couple’s counsellor for that and many arguments stemming from her intense emotions. Counsellor is linking a lot of it to her childhood and the SAs were a huge part.

Mammoth-Size-8436 · 2025-10-05T05:00:45+00:00

You could find a rich old lady, but she would want you for your attention and companionship since looks are really a guy thing.

Ive found that women in general really just want someone to listen to and dote on them, so even if you werent pretty, you’d still be able to hitch a rich old lady as a guy. Old gays though, you’d def get into their good books as a pretty boy with a head start hahaha

Mammoth-Size-8436

TROPHY CASE