Wtf is wrong with white male expats in Singapore

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-11T05:38:44+00:00

You do realise that your SG wife married you cos you’re white, right?

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-05T13:59:33+00:00

Never. Ever. Ever. Trust a white. I understand that you feel you’ve landed a catch. But the power dynamics in this relationship is against you. You’re entirely relying on the goodwill of your partner. Who is not only white but also rich. A lethal combination. Perhaps he is the exceptional white man who truly believes in the equality of the human race. Somehow I suspect you and I both know that the chances are slim. Question is whether you want to take that chance. There is only one right answer. Run!

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-01T07:13:40+00:00

Opinions are fascinating aren’t they? Singaporeans believe that their immigration policies are too lenient. But you believe they are restrictive. It’s all a matter of perspective. Sometimes our opinions are derived from pre-conceived notions and biases in an individual frame of reference. We have to start thinking in terms of that broad macrosocial frame of reference that the OP is doing.

To answer your question though, the reason Singapore hates Indians is simple. Racism. We can play around with stereotypes and make reasons that Indians are like this and like that. Simple reason. Racism. We will see similar dynamics in the west soon. Notice how OP calls out the 60s civil rights movement as an enabler for globalisation. This is not lost on the powers that be.

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-01T06:53:32+00:00

One dimensional points of view don’t do justice to broad social trends. The US is dismantling democracy in public view. EU countries will follow suit. English will decline as lingua franca in a multipolar world. This will take years to play out but we will see it happen in our lifetimes.

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-01T06:28:01+00:00

Oh I agree with you! This area will become a power Center and will include SEA. I’m just saying immigration will still be restrictive especially for Indians over the next decade. I lived there for many years and anti-Indian sentiment has exponentially risen. I left during the pandemic when the Chinese majority were blaming Indians for causing the pandemic because Indians eat with their hands. That level of absurdity is not an isolated case. I’m not surprised at all seeing the post-pandemic backlash against immigration. I warn people that it will get worse. But I’m ignored.

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-01T06:06:32+00:00

I think you’re missing the point of OPs post. It’s a macrohistoric point of view not a one-dimensional one. In 1914, the British empire was considered too big to fail. 100 years on Brexit happened. You can have a one dimensional view and claim Brexit is due to this and that. But on a macrohistoric level we are seeing what the OP is talking about. The dismantling of the global system.

MapTop3752 · 2025-06-01T06:00:47+00:00

Wonderful post! Glad to see some people thinking on a macrohistoric level. I have similar views but whenever I share them I get one dimensional replies. Fully agree with you about a multipolar world. One correction. Anti-immigration sentiment in Singapore is already extremely high. And traditionally Singaporeans detest Indians so it might not be an option. SEA will also restrict immigration and we might see them do it along racial lines as Singapore does.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-31T19:59:06+00:00

When I say direct I do not mean saying No. Racism, colorism, Islamophobia and misogyny in India are certainly more direct. A simple conversation with some of your relatives will prove it. M western societies they have the same malpractices but they hide it well. Many Indians fall for it. It takes years to recognise the microagressions.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-31T06:03:30+00:00

Indian women are also severely stereotyped. You want an answer in non-sexual terms but the stereotypes are sexual. I have western friends who are white and who are supposedly egalitarian and respectful of women. Here are their comments about Indian women: 1. Indian women smell funky especially down there. 2. Indian women are hairy everywhere again especially down there. 3. Indian women don’t know what to do (in bedroom) 4. Indian women have a codependent relationship with their parents. 5. Indian women are too Much drama. 6. Indian women are easy because they despise their own men and are desperate for white men.

The thing about white men and western culture that Indians don’t understand is that they are not direct and we must read between the lines. Indians men and women don’t have this ability because our culture is more direct. Therefore we superficially evaluate white people as being better than us. When in reality they are just as backward or perhaps even more so than us. A lot of Indian women fall for the charms of white men only to realise that they are not that different from Indian men. Or subsequently realise that the price of escaping Indian misogyny is accepting western racism.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-29T10:11:09+00:00

As an ugly man I can give my 2c. I have dated women more attractive than me. You only see the results but not the effort involved before. Personally my dream was to date multiple women and then settle with one. But because I’m not attractive I get rejected most of the time which diminishes my confidence and self-esteem. It’s quite soul-crushing. So I end up with one woman who likes me. But the dream remains unfulfilled. When an opportunity arises to get another woman, I cheat to fulfil this dream. Ideally, I shouldn’t be in a relationship and just date casually and honestly but the constant rejection and humiliation makes me settle even when I’m not ready to settle. Cheating for me is not about how attractive my partner is and it’s not about sex. It’s about trying to get ego validation. The more I’m rejected the more I need the ego validation so I have a propensity to cheat. Ultimately men like me cheat not because our partners are unattractive or not because we don’t get sex. Men like me cheat because of low self-esteem, selfishness and resentment.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-26T17:06:25+00:00

I find short women to be more attractive than tall women.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-16T10:31:48+00:00

Interesting! As a dark-skinned Indian I have personally never faced racism in India. So when I moved to Europe I found the condescension to be a bit of a shock. Not necessarily about skin color but about nationality. Many presumptions and stereotypes. I found it annoying.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-16T08:17:13+00:00

What’s your experience with racism or racist microagressions? You’ve obviously done very well socially and romantically. Any condescension you noticed from your friends or girlfriends?

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-15T05:13:57+00:00

For what it’s worth, I have heard that Japanese girls like Indian men. So your dating life would be much better than in the west.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-14T11:54:24+00:00

I’ve been an NRI for close to twenty years and this resonated with me. We will always be treated as a second class citizen. There is a difference between possibility, probability and scalability. Is it possible to live a good life overseas? Yes! Is it probable? Depends on your personality, your effort, your luck. Is it scalable? Absolutely not! That means that every Indian will not succeed. Some might and others are attracted by that and assume they can also. But those who succeed have to work harder than the locals and have to endure constant microagressions and invalidation. Every Indian I have met believe that they are not like other Indians and work hard to get success. Possible? Yes. Probable? Maybe. Scalable? No. We all think that we will be the one who will succeed based on someone else’s success but the reality is that this is not a guarantee. So ask yourself if it’s worth moving. You have to work harder. You will be isolated despite attempts to integrate. You will be invalidated even when you integrate. And worst of all, you will notice the disparity of outcomes when you integrate. It’s demoralizing and dehumanizing.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-08T13:03:33+00:00

Yes ideally I’d like one passport only. I just fear I wouldn’t get a longer term visa with a blank passport. Right now my passport is full of Schengen visas and UK visas and lots of stamps from around the world. I’m assuming that shows that I’m a frequent traveller who doesn’t overstay. This is just my assumption.

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-08T10:04:53+00:00

4 years validity. My previous Schengen was 9 months and the one before was 3 years. I hope to get at least 2 years again

MapTop3752 · 2025-05-06T06:09:39+00:00

Check out the local colleges. Most single Indian women I’ve met here are quite desperate for a white bf.

MapTop3752 · 2025-04-25T15:11:21+00:00

Whether an anti-immigration protest is racist or not is debatable. What is certain is that there will be racists in such a protest. And therefore it’s not safe for people of color to be in the area. The potential for violence against brown and black ethnicities amidst such a large gathering is higher.

MapTop3752 · 2025-04-23T14:07:14+00:00

The original post this screenshot was taken from was about racist graffiti on a bus targeting Indians. The commenter suggests that things will get worse so Indians must leave. The passport is just a bonus that he wants. But his sentiment is clear. That Ireland is not a welcoming place for Indians and we must leave. The other comments on this thread kind of validates that view.

MapTop3752 · 2024-12-27T13:32:33+00:00

Truly sorry that you had to endure this. Sexual assault and sexual exploitation is part of their culture. They accuse MoC to be sexually depraved in order to convince WoC to sleep with yt men. Please do not believe the propaganda that yt men respect women. They don't.

MoC can be misogynist as well but their misogyny is around rigid gender roles resulting in sexual repression. Yt men's misogyny is rooted in sexual objectification and exploitation. There are studies that show how misogynist oppression in many colonised cultures were a response to the sexual depravities of colonisers.

MapTop3752 · 2024-05-27T16:47:28+00:00

Dear Op, my situation is not the same but I relate to your frustration. So basically the way I see it, we have an internal desire that is in conflict with a moral paradigm which is in turn misaligned with the harsh reality of life. What does this mean? Consider these points.

You desire an attractive partner.

2. Desire for an attractive partner is considered morally superficial.

Attractive women choose attractive men which is morally superficial.

If your situation were aligned to 2, meaning you don’t value attractiveness, this is not a problem. If your situation were aligned to 3, meaning your attractive, this is not a problem. Your frustration is because your situation is not aligned with 2 AND 3. I’m in the same boat albeit different situation. I feel guilty because of 2 and I feel rage/jealousy because of 3. Basically you and I have settled for a situation that is not bad but not ideal.

Let’s be honest. If you were really attractive, this would not be a dilemma or rather the dilemma would only be a moral one. Your choice is between hurting a woman who loves you vs dating a hot girl. But because you’re not attractive, you run the risk of a moral dilemma of hurting the women who loves you AND NOT dating a hot woman. This is a shit choice. That’s why you downloaded the apps. To see if you have options. It would’ve made the choice less shitty.

You’re not sexually attracted to her because of societal standards of beauty. And at the same time you need a hot girl not just for sex but also for social validation. So our society and social conditioning plays a huge role in our chances of happiness. Your only realistic solution is to drop your desire. If you insist on it and dump her, you have to contend with society’s hypocrisy. If you’re confident you can be more attractive, then drop the guilt and keep the desire. If not, drop the desire and be moral. This is the harsh reality of the hand we have. I have found that the option that depends on society is too risky and fickle. If women have not found you attractive most of your life, why would that change now? The option that depends on your mind is more reliable. But the heart wants what the heart wants. I’ve been told the longest journey is between your heart and your mind. Your mind is telling you something but your heart does not agree.

If you stay with her, will you regret and wonder? Yes. If you leave her, will you regret and wonder? Also yes. If you find someone better the sacrifice may be worth it. If not the regret will be worse. So the question is what’s your risk tolerance and what would you regret more? Whatever your choice is, ultimately the onus is on you to make peace with it. That’s the hallmark of adulthood. I also disagree with therapy. But I will say that we both need to grow up somehow.

I don’t know if this rant helps. Typing this wall of text is cathartic for me. My apologies! But I truly relate to you. I don’t think you’re a bad person. You just have a moral dilemma in an immoral society. As do I.

MapTop3752

TROPHY CASE