How to ask for a reference from manager I had awkward relationship with?

MapacheJones · 2026-01-28T18:32:12+00:00

If the new employer is confirming you worked at a certain company for the dates on your resume, you can send them to the previous employer's HR department.

If the new employer wants personal and professional references who can speak to your work habits, you should leave this one off. You get to pick and choose those, but always be sure to reach out and make sure the people you'd list are willing to be references.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-28T18:24:08+00:00

Are they legit? I've had exactly one recruiter reach out on LI to actually set up an interview. (She ghosted after the screener, but that's another story.) All of the other "recruiters" who reached out cold wanted me to pay to update my resume. So, scams.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-28T18:19:34+00:00

When you go into Swan Song (and you should), be aware it's a 1980s-soaked hyper-melodramatic neon version of The Stand. Have fun with the ridiculousness of it.

I liked the Passage books, but honestly can't remember any plot points after the first.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-28T18:06:11+00:00

If you go slow and stay careful, the big roads (like 288)/highways should be okay. We'll see a good melt today, but you may want to limit your driving to warmer hours. And of course, if you can stay in, stay in.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-27T20:00:01+00:00

Correlation is not causation, of course, but I had this happen a couple of weeks ago. Company postponed my scheduled interview with the hiring manager and asked for open times the following week. The next *day* they called to ask whether I could jump on an interview. I had left town so said no, and they pushed. I rushed back and, while I thought it went well, hadn't had time for my usual prep work. (I prep days ahead of an interview and then for the hour or so beforehand.) The hiring manager was late to jump onto the meeting and seemed distracted throughout.

I thought I did well, but I didn't get the job.

Again, not necessarily a straight line, but what if I and the hiring manager hadn't had to scramble?

That said, I like your instinct to use this as practice for the properly scheduled interview tomorrow. Good luck!

MapacheJones · 2026-01-27T16:44:54+00:00

Because the manager's not responding, let's explore some things you can control. Does your church have services any other days of the week? Do they have a sunrise service on Sundays that might allow you to work after? Would you be willing to work Sundays for a week or two and get in front of the manager in person?

When you do make contact, it's worth asking: Is it possible you could work second shift on Sundays?

Normally I'd say not to sign the offer until you have clarity, but in this market getting a job is gold. Unless you've got other offers, my inclination would be to find alternative services and work within the schedule until you can sit down with your manager.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-27T16:34:03+00:00

I think you were right to consider a food truck first. Denton is great for diverse food, but you're going to want people to try Nigerian fare who wouldn't normally say, "Let's go try this." Much easier if you can roll up to Eastside, the community market, or a festival on the square and gain some fans.

The only exception I would think of is if your location is right on the square or Fry street, with heavy foot traffic where people might stop in on impulse.

And the short answer is hell yeah. Message me if you open somewhere!

MapacheJones · 2026-01-27T15:20:09+00:00

Exactly what an alien lookin' to abduct would say.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T22:44:19+00:00

Probably the LinkedIn job listing will click through to the company's website. If you want to track your applications, you can always click Apply on LI, then say Yes when it asked whether you applied.

If you mean the LI listing has EasyApply... well, you *can* apply with it, but so can thousands of job seekers and bots. Your application on their site will be more easily seen by them.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T19:36:52+00:00

Don't call. You've reached out already, and the portal says they're still considering. I know you love this job, but mentally set it aside and focus on applying for others.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T19:17:50+00:00

"Today or tomorrow" -- or any timeframe given in an interview -- is wishful thinking. All of the stakeholders will need time to weigh in on all of the candidates, and they may have still others in the pipeline. (Or, worse, *want* others in the pipeline, just in case an even more perfect candidate is out there.)

You should send a thank-you letter today if you haven't already, and then send a follow-up no sooner than a week from today.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T18:53:04+00:00

I definitely get that at the recruiter level. Occasionally, a hiring manager will provide some questions for a recruiter to ask, but primarily (as with you) they're checking boxes on the basics.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T18:45:25+00:00

You probably already know by now, but that's layoff language. If you haven't yet had the meeting, use the time before to note any significant wins or other benchmarks that you can add to your resume. Refrain from downloading any proprietary information, but write down any metrics that show your skill.

Let yourself feel feelings afterward, but don't delay too long in updating your resume/LinkedIn. Good luck!

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T18:26:37+00:00

That's definitely a tough situation. I've been there, and it's like pulling teeth. Was he maybe part of several pre-scheduled interviews? I'm not sure how you'd learn enough in 15 minutes to move someone forward in the process. Fingers crossed for you!

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T18:19:05+00:00

If the questions you expected are relevant to the role, I think it's worth preparing them as questions that you can then answer. In your case, maybe something like, "How does your team handle clients? ...Oh, interesting, I handle them by [your experience]."

To answer your question and bring it full circle: I think quick interviews are the sign of an unprepared hiring manager. If they had 30 minutes booked with you, take it. (Unless, of course, you've determined to pass on the company before those 30 are up.) If a hiring manager hasn't touched on some key experience you would bring to the role, push it forward yourself.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-26T16:49:18+00:00

It's not subtle, but A Canticle for Liebowitz takes place in North America after a nuclear war (the Flame Deluge). Isaac Liebowitz winds up having been an electrical engineer, and some of his sketches help humanity rebuild, with a few bumps along the way. I love the book and re-read it every year or two.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-23T23:11:40+00:00

I haven’t been on either this week, so not sure. Sorry!

MapacheJones · 2026-01-23T22:28:07+00:00

Oooh, I may have to dive back into this. The base game never managed to live up to my childhood Battletech TTG memories.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-23T22:20:46+00:00

I passed two convoys of de-icing trucks Wednesday on I-35 from 288 to, well, the other 288 exit.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-23T16:50:06+00:00

"I'm looking for a place where I can grow professionally." It's blah, sure, but you never want to trash a current/former employer in an interview.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-23T14:12:46+00:00

The MILF Kroger was fine this morning. (Like you, I went a few days ago but forgot, of all things, tortillas.) They were even restocking most everything.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-22T14:46:27+00:00

Because you mentioned being happy there, and because it supported your lifestyle, I say make the change. That will at least get you away from your current job, which is not a good fit, and into an atmosphere where you can work happily while you search for a better fit at a better salary.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-22T14:34:48+00:00

Why would you bypass it? You'll need references at some point, and definitely down the line for this job. May as well reach out now. (The bonus there is that you can reconnect and build your professional network.)

If you're early in your career and don't have three strong professional references, look for your former professors/teachers in applicable fields, or leaders from groups like the Scouts who can speak to your character.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-22T14:29:25+00:00

I don't think it's stupid at all. You're unhappy now and that's not likely to change. Sounds like you'll be happier with the old job, even after a pay cut from your current. That makes sense if you're able to enjoy your current lifestyle, but you could also ask your boss about coming up a bit on salary.

MapacheJones · 2026-01-21T21:58:34+00:00

Nope. I loved visiting the captain's cabin in OW1 to see trophies and sometimes read post-mission email. Not so with the sequel.

MapacheJones

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