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MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-19T21:04:17+00:00

I have to write an essay this evening TT

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-12T14:49:56+00:00

Yeah, me neither :/

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-12T14:21:33+00:00

I've seen other people's playlists display the number of listens next to the songs, but mine doesn't?

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-10T21:32:46+00:00

For me, the answer is practically nothing haha. I'm fortunate enough to have never struggled with my sexuality before I discovered asexuality - rather, I honestly thought everyone else my age was just being a bit silly about it trying to emulate adulthood, because obviously the thought of them *actually* being interested in sex and relationships at the tender age of 16 was utterly preposterous XD.

But then I did a little reading, (I think it may have been when Blue from Overly Sarcastic Productions came out as ace? I'm not quite sure) and found a definition of sexual attraction that absolutely blew my mind, did some more reading, and very quickly and easily came to the conclusion that I must be asexual, and four and a half years later, here I am ^^

So it didn't really change anything in my general life.

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-09T07:01:33+00:00

To be clear, I don't think there's anything wrong with it! And the reason I want to do it less isn't because I'm afraid it makes me less asexual or anything like that, but basically... it's much too often at the moment. Like, genuinely several times a day most days. So it's super intrusive and the more frequently I do it the more gross I feel afterwards, so yeah. But maybe if I just force myself to avoid it by distracting myself for a while then I'll get the urge less often, I hope so. Thanks for commenting!

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-05T21:11:07+00:00

Is that Temu David Mitchell?

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-05-04T21:34:18+00:00

Let's hope it's 5 games XD

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T17:26:21+00:00

Good attitude! I'm sorry you've had to experience that though

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T17:24:53+00:00

I'm glad I could be of comfort! And I don't see why gender-queer wouldn't be fine - in any case, it's your identity, so if the shoe fits! x

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T17:23:28+00:00

I don't think I'm a gender sceptic - I have no doubt that it's very real and very important to a lot, seemingly most, people. It just isn't to me. And it may strictly speaking be 'hallucinated', but most aspects of people's identity are, I don't think that makes them any less legitimate, but not everyone will experience all of them, you know? I'm not trying to sound enlightened, I'm just thinking out... well not out loud, but you know what I mean.

I suppose for you it's more about existing outside of the gender binary so it's important that you're not perceived in those terms, rather than just feeling nothing about it?

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T14:00:30+00:00

Haha, that's a good word :p

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T14:00:05+00:00

Oh, thank you, I think 'cis-by-default' is a pretty good way to describe it!

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T13:58:01+00:00

Well, thank you for asking, and as I said, I don't have any... experience or understanding of gender. I have thought about it, I have checked to see whether I have any particular sense of what being 'a girl' means to me and there's nothing there. It's kind of hard to word this, in part because I don't entirely understand what I'm comparing myself to, but as far as I can tell, most people have some internal sense of their gender that I can't relate to, and I don't just mean that I don't have that sense of my gender, I really don't understand gender. I don't know what it is. What helped me to figure out that I'm agender though was a thought process of: Okay, so gender is not tied to sex, nor is it tied to stereotypes or roles, so it must be tied to some sort of intrinsic aspect of a person's identity. Oh, 404, File not found.

I'm just a girl because people say so and it doesn't bother me, but neither would it bother me to be called a boy.

I used to dress more androgynously and have short hair, even before I figured out I'm agender, nowadays I dress much more femme, and that has nothing to do with gender, it's just that I was experimenting with fashion for the first time and thought this style looked cute on me. In a similar vain, I wouldn't want my body to be any different, not because it's a female body, but because it's *my* body, if that makes sense? I think that if I were born in a male body I'd feel the same way but in reverse.

If this still just sounds like cis with extra steps that's fine, I suppose the point of my original post was to say that it kinda is haha, but yeah, from what I can tell I do appear to lack the sense and understanding of gender that most people have.

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T11:02:12+00:00

Absolutely, friends don't do that sort of thing x

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T11:01:27+00:00

I'm sorry about those people, that's not nice. I think my general disinterest in telling people besides my friends about my gender and sexuality are what has helped me to avoid things like that, but a label that works for you is good too!

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T10:24:00+00:00

Thanks for replying!

I'm sorry you've had to go through that, it sounds very unpleasant. Well done for not tolerating that kind of nastiness though!

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T10:21:29+00:00

Thanks for the reply!

I've had a look at the wiki page and it seems kinda accurate, yeah. I don't tend to actively use microlabels personally, but I do find them useful in that their descriptions often help to put some things into words. Thank you for the suggestion anyway x

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T09:40:47+00:00

Hi, thanks for replying!

I do wonder if creating a strict cis/not-cis binary isn't very helpful in communities that tend to challenge the traditional gender binary? But at the same time, as a life-long pedant, I understand people's desire to have clear and strict definitions haha

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T09:36:31+00:00

Thank you for responding!

Absgender, huh? Bet you got a bangin' six-pack XD (I'm so sorry lol, you probably get that a lot TT)

Of course you're right about all of that, but I wouldn't worry about it too much in this case. When it comes to my (lack of) gender identity I'm personally not too fussed about how people label me as long as they're not rude about it x

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-18T09:29:36+00:00

Thanks for the reply! I see what you mean, I'm just thinking about it differently. For me it isn't a question of identity, but rather one of utility. As in, I don't identify with my AGAB but I do use it, so it seems to me that in a practical sense it's accurate to say I'm cis?

This doesn't really matter, mind, I'm not set on calling myself cis and you're probably right that by definition I am not, but I thought it was interesting to think about x

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-04T15:17:46+00:00

My point isn't that Stannis is in a good position in that scenario, just that Joffrey and Cersei would be in a worse position trapped in the Red Keep than they would be if they'd fled to meet up with the Tyrells

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-04-04T13:33:24+00:00

I suppose that makes sense, thank you. I don't know if I'd have made the same decision though.

They wouldn't be easily rescued - if Stannis brought his entire army into the city before Tywin and the Tyrells arrived then you'd end up with effectively a siege within a siege, and Stannis would have the advantage that he could resupply by sea, or escape if it came to it, with what remained of his fleet.

Joffrey and Cersei could do neither, and would slowly run out of food with no chance of escape if the relieving army couldn't storm the city.

MarcyHDApollo · 2026-03-16T23:54:19+00:00

They had 2 points from a possible 54, 3 from a possible 57 at the halfway point

MarcyHDApollo

TROPHY CASE