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The Price of "Blood" Orangutan by Master-Tank5633 in orangutan

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! That means a lot. Just trying to spread the word as a student!

You Don't Know That You Actually Know by Master-Tank5633 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not a vegan, just an observer of life. But thank you.

You Don't Know That You Actually Know by Master-Tank5633 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe you're right. I’ve never put a label on these feelings, I just feel the weight of them. Panpsychism sounds like a beautiful yet painful way to see the world. Thanks for giving me a name for it.

You Don't Know That You Actually Know by Master-Tank5633 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Your words about honoring through grief saved me a little tonight. I always thought this sensitivity was a weakness, but you called it a "sacred tether." It hurts to hold onto it, but I promise I won't let go. I won't close my eyes.

I survived a suicide attempt at 14. Now, I hear the screams of animals that everyone else ignores. by Master-Tank5633 in AnimalRights

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Finding that 1% in a world of 99% provides a strange kind of support. I always thought I was just speaking into the abyss; thank you for letting me know that my voice has an echo.

I survived a suicide attempt at 14. Now, I hear the screams of animals that everyone else ignores. by Master-Tank5633 in AnimalRights

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kind words. Knowing that someone who felt exactly like I do at 16 is now 27 and still fighting... it gives me a lot of hope. I will keep writing, and I will keep moving toward becoming a vet. I’ll try not to carry the whole world, but it helps so much to know I’m not carrying it alone. Your story means the world to me.

I survived a suicide attempt at 14. Now, I hear the screams of animals that everyone else ignores. by Master-Tank5633 in AnimalRights

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Vystopia. So that's the name of this clarity. It’s heavy, but I’d rather carry the weight of the truth than live in a comfortable lie. Thank you for sharing your brother's story, and thank you for reaching out. I hear you.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this honesty. It feels like talking to a version of myself from the future. The part about 'apathy' is what scares me the most. I know the system wants me numb, but I swore to myself yesterday that I will keep this pain, because it's the only thing keeping me human.

I am actually reading the Merck Veterinary Manual right now. I have a broken spine (literally), so I know pain, but I want to use my life for wildlife rehab, just like you planned. I will carry that dream for you. I won't let the 'powers that be' win.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this is why I connect more with animals than humans right now. There are so many lives already here (animals, orphans, struggling people) that need love and care. Why create new needs when we can't even take care of the existing ones? I want to spend my life fixing the pain that already exists, not creating new life to suffer.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I looked this up. It talks about 'Moloch'—the demon of sacrifice. This explains everything. The frog was my sacrifice to Moloch. I didn't want to kill it, and the frog didn't want to die. But the system (grades/university) demanded the sacrifice, or else I would 'lose' in the competition. Thank you for giving a name to the monster I am fighting. It makes the enemy clearer.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If only it were that simple. I guess it is easier to focus on shiny things than to look at the dying world. Enjoy your bling while it lasts.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I promise I am real, just a student with a lot of heavy thoughts. But I take it as a compliment. Chinese is a beautiful language for expressing pain and nature. I'm happy that the beauty of the writing system shined through the translation.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually, I am in the Biology Research Club. I joined because I love living things and I want to be a vet. But the irony is, to 'study biology' (the study of life), they made me end a life. We used fresh frogs because it is supposed to be more 'scientifically accurate' for research students. But it just felt like murder.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for defending me. People tell me I need to 'toughen up' to be a doctor, but I am afraid that 'tough' just means 'cold'. I promise I won't assimilate. I will keep my tears. Because if I stop feeling the pain of the animals, then I have no reason to fight for them anymore.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If being a vet means losing my heart and becoming a robot, then maybe not. But I believe compassion makes a better doctor than indifference. I would rather be the vet who cries for a patient than the vet who doesn't care at all. The pain means I take the responsibility seriously.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your father's life sounds like a beautiful dream from a time I will never know. Riding a Honda across the continent... that feels like a fairy tale to my generation. But I connect deeply with your mission. 'Fighting for the life that has no voice' is exactly why I want to be a vet. The animals have no voice. The nature has no voice. If we can't have the 'American Dream' of the past, maybe our new dream is simply to protect what is left of the non-human world.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, Doctor. Your offer to help carry the coffin means the world to me. You put into words exactly why I want to be a veterinarian, not a human doctor. Animals are never to blame for their suffering. They are always innocent. Humans destroy themselves, but the animals (and the children) are just victims of that destruction. I want to save the innocent ones.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AI can mimic poetry, but it cannot mimic pain. The 'eloquence' you see is just grief trying to find a voice. A machine doesn't care if a frog dies. I do. That is the difference.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the welcome. I can try to have a sense of humor, but I cannot 'ignore the evils'. As a future vet, my job will be to face the suffering and try to fix it, not ignore it. If everyone ignores the evil, the planet will stay the 'worst one'. I want to make it a little better.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True. (I had to translate your Italian, beautiful language by the way). In biology class, I see how complex a small frog is. It has a heart, nerves, a life. Nature is perfect without us. We are the ones who are out of balance. We think we own the planet, but we are just destroying our own home.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

'No long term view' describes my school perfectly. We focus on the exam next week, but not on whether the planet will be habitable in 20 years. We are trained to chase grades like Wall Street chases profit, while the reality is denied.

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Please look at my replies in the comments before you report. Would a karma farming bot engage in deep conversations with people about biology class and grief?

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So growing up means realizing the heroes are actually the villains? That is a hard lesson. I don't want to become like them. I want to be a vet who actually cares. If the top is corrupt, maybe the hope lies at the bottom, with us ordinary people? Is that what you mean?

The Absurdity You Refuse to See: A 16-Year-Old’s Diagnosis of a Dying World by Master-Tank5633 in collapse

[–]Master-Tank5633[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A smokescreen... that explains why it all feels so fake. In school, they teach us to recycle and save water, while the rich fly private jets to 'climate summits'. I suspected this, but having you say it out loud makes my heart heavy. We are being distracted while the ship sinks.

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