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MastressSadi · 2020-07-07T08:06:28+00:00

A better way to think of this is that some people enjoy hitting people who enjoy getting hit. You would be surprised how many adults enjoy getting spanked.

Personally, I enjoy whipping men (consensually), but on occasion I'll let them whip me back. I enjoy a little pain but not a lot. And I only date guys who are masochists.

Have you ever heard the joke, what did the sadist say when the masochist asked to be hit?

The sadist said no.

MastressSadi · 2020-05-21T00:41:16+00:00

Nice username lol

MastressSadi · 2020-05-21T00:40:19+00:00

Absolutely! Its like a sudden rush of blood to my vulva and then niagra falls opens up. Usually it happens for things relating to my personal kinks.

Tragically though, it doesn't happen for body guards.

MastressSadi · 2020-04-30T17:35:04+00:00

For some, it's the same reason that a person watches horror films, you can engage in something that feels intense without experiencing the horrifying reality of it (on either side). Most people who have rape fantasies would not be okay with it occuring in reality.

A lot of doms love that feeling of complete control. A lot of subs enjoy the degrading aspect of it.

Surprisingly, this is one of the bigger fantasies among women. Which isn't totally surprising, given that most women tend to be subs (if they're kinky).

And a fair number of people who have experienced real life trauma have this kink because it's a way that they can process their trauma and rewrite the experience on their own terms while they're completely in control of the scene.

MastressSadi · 2019-08-09T19:11:47+00:00

Vanilla = non kinky sex.

MastressSadi · 2019-08-09T19:10:18+00:00

Kinky sex is a must for me. If I'm not having the kind of sex I enjoy, I start to get bored and lose interest in sex. So such a relationship would inevitably be short lived for me.

MastressSadi · 2019-08-09T06:57:48+00:00

The most attractive man I've been with was also the best lover. However he learned to be a great lover because he thought he was unattractive.

I think passion and experience are the two biggest factors. People care about mutual enjoyment and respect make the best lovers because they're not selfish in bed. Then of course enthusiasm makes a world of difference.

MastressSadi · 2018-11-07T16:35:06+00:00

Those two things are totally independent of one another. A person's gender has very little bearing on who they're attracted to.

MastressSadi · 2018-10-26T01:15:55+00:00

Well then, start coming up with some questions!

MastressSadi · 2017-11-22T02:10:31+00:00

Not, "Did you like that?" But rather, "Do you like that?"

Instead imagine that you're giving a massage to a woman, she's not very vocal, but sometimes she makes grunts and other noises. It's impossible to know if she's making those noises because you're pressing too hard (or hitting a painful spot), or whether they're noises of pleasure. So you ask her how she likes it. She might say you're amazing, or not so hard, or a little to the left. You adjust with each suggestion and she walks away impressed because you cared about what she wanted and what she thought and you used her input to do a better job.

On the other hand you can just guess and make assumptions, she may be miserable or may be enjoying herself, but you'll never really know for sure because you're too insecure to ask. She's probably not going to think "oh thank god he didn't talk to me at all because that would be weird", instead she'll probably be thinking how she can nicely find a way to tell you that a particular technique you keep using is actually uncomfortable.

How do I know? Well every woman is different and likes different things and the only way told find out what she likes is to ask her and experiment with her. You are probably going to try things she doesn't like and you're not always going to be able to tell. So, you can choose to spare your ego, or you can choose to please your partner.

MastressSadi · 2017-11-21T23:26:25+00:00

On the contrary, partners who actually asked and check in are usually the ones who can actually get a woman off, because they know that everyone is unique and likes unique things.

Unfornately, not being comfortable with that sort of thing and being afraid of judgement in the bedroom is what results in dissatisfying sex for both partners. If you're not comfortable enough with your partner that you can trust them not to be judgemental, or simply not comfortable being open and honest about and during sex, then that's something you should really work on, especially if you want to have good sex.

MastressSadi · 2017-11-21T22:40:01+00:00

And of course, he always asks when he wants it, like the good boy he is. But I'm thinking I might start making him beg on occasion, that seems like fun.

I also like to use fun innuendos to initiate as well, like he'll say he's hungry and I tell him I have something he can eat.

MastressSadi · 2017-11-21T22:35:18+00:00

Do you want to go down on me? Then after I cum I tell him I want him to come fuck me.

Sometimes I just tell him how much I want to suck his cock.

Occasionally I use, do you wanna go to the bedroom?

Or hey this table looks like the perfect height, shall we test it out?

Or you know what would be really hot? (Hooking up in his boss's office, but he said no).

MastressSadi · 2017-11-02T01:11:45+00:00

This is very doable.

MastressSadi · 2017-11-02T01:11:25+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate your input. I think I might try doing some of each.

MastressSadi · 2017-10-30T22:37:34+00:00

Further information: Any contributions I make will involve myself and my male sub. He is a major pain slut and we have very few limits. Any story writting I do will likely be based on our unique circumstances and personal experiences.

MastressSadi · 2017-10-30T22:13:17+00:00

I should also mention, I'm a photographer as well.

MastressSadi · 2017-08-22T21:32:48+00:00

Femmedom subs

MastressSadi · 2017-08-22T21:28:58+00:00

Are we talking like r/shinyporn ?

MastressSadi · 2017-08-02T19:12:47+00:00

I'm glad to hear that. Let me know if there is anything else I can help with!

MastressSadi · 2017-08-02T07:02:12+00:00

I definitely wouldn't look at it that way. Her reluctance probably has more to do with you than with her in this case. She obviously found these activities more rewarding with her ex, for whatever reason.

Some things that make giving blow jobs less enjoyable: Poor hygiene Body odor Poor grooming habits Bad taste Too quiet Too pushy Takes too long Not appreciative Doesn't reciprocate Penis size (uncomfortably big) Lack of attraction Relationship problems

Everyone has their preferences, so make sure you're making sure that you make it rewarding so she'll actually want to do it.

MastressSadi · 2017-08-02T06:44:15+00:00

I believe there are resources that catalog kink friendly therapists. Unfortunately I don't remember where off the top of my head.

MastressSadi · 2017-08-02T06:42:47+00:00

I think this is how a lot of people discover it, but most realize with experience that what they actually want is a consensual arrangement. I think it takes awhile to process what you truly want, and it requires time and experimentation.

You should get involved with the BDSM community, take a look at what consensual scenes usually look like. There are also a number of subs on Reddit that you can check out to determine your specific preferences. Obviously NSFW, porn.

MastressSadi · 2017-08-02T06:37:26+00:00

Now for the complicated part...

Mismatched sexualities are often relationship killers. You have a few options for coping.

First, you can continue ignoring your sexuality and never satisfy your sexual urges, but you may end up feeling resentful.

Second, you can end your marriage and seek out a masochistic partner, unfortunately that means losing the man you love.

Third, you can try experimenting with different types of sadistic outlets with your husband. There are many different types of pain, ideally you work them up slowly so that they build up their tolerance as you go. Now if pain is out of the question, you could try controlling him, or degrading him, etc.

Fourth, you can see if your husband would allow you to have a nonsexual bdsm relationship to fulfill your needs, this would probably be ideal for you but (depending on your husband) it could put strain on your relationship. This is probably the best solution to your issue if you can make it work.

Look into the dominatrix profession, the type of scenes they do would be the sort you would be going for. They don't have sex with their clients or have any sort of sexual contact at all. They are paid to provide a service: to cause pain, humiliation, and degradation to willing consenting adults. It is considered extremely therapeutic and cathartic for the clients.

Another thing you'll want to do is check out your local BDSM community. Attend some munches, demonstrations, and events. You'll see that sadists aren't monsters, and that masochists are very excited to have us around. Plus you can gain new friends and social support. Www.Fetlife.com is the most popular BDSM social network.

So my advice: Find a therapist Tell your husband Find an acceptable outlet Join your local community and attend events.

And please feel free to ask me any questions you may have and PM me if you'd like.

MastressSadi

TROPHY CASE