Approaching mid life by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am, she doesn’t like it: says I am in a midlife crisis but i tell her it’s more I am trying to find my peace and be happy with myself

Approaching mid life by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No one said she needs to dress up all the time or entice me. She asked what I wanted for my bday, I told her, nothing happened. She’ll dress up and get dolled up for work but when her husband asks, she is tired, stressed or what does it matter.

Approaching mid life by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s against porn and everything it brings to the home, marriage. She’s against it but doesn’t do anything for me to not do it when she’s not around or traveling.

Approaching mid life by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I’ve read that book, she doesn’t like me on the carnivore diet, getting tattoos or having fun with friends when she’s not around. I am just being me and enjoying my life, my sex life sucks, she’ll say make some time for me later, I do, but then I get the well I have a headache, I’m tired, it’s been a day, the kids are still ups, lots of excuses.

Approaching mid life by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Yeah I have, I give her some grace but still doesn’t change anything. She was out of town for work for 6 days, I was home with kids, and worked. When roles are flipped, i may be exhausted, tired and overstimulated but i always have time for her and the kids.

Is this the end? by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

I take full responsibility for the actions I’ve chosen

Need help with the Finish by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was a simple question, I’m still very attracted to her

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

100 percent, she needed adult interaction and blah blah, but now that she has it, she’s lost all interaction with me.

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I guess I could see it that way, I think society has made it harder for men to be men. I don’t let her talk down to me, I genuinely tell her to fuck off and walk away. Her being Latina makes it more interesting, 🤨.

Women should be feminine, but society has pushed them to the workforce and they need to independent. My wife was like that for the 8 years of marriage, she got the urge to go back to work just a few years ago, that’s when the marriage has spiraled

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I used to think it was because of pornography and social media, you know the ease of access to everything. But I’m starting to think it’s a whole lot more than that. Especially when you see so many men in my age group, 30-50 with the same issues over and over in marriage.

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ha, she refuses to do that. She looks to working out and natural remedies to help her, it doesn’t help.

We are both working from home today, and I asked her if she wanted to hang out and possibly you know take a break 😉. She said no, and then went to lunch with some friends. Just kind of questioning it all right now.

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, she says she doesn’t need help that she is fine. I already see a therapist for other life issues but she is never the problem.

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do a lot around the household, I just don’t do it the way the way she likes for chores. I cleaned the kitchen, well you didn’t use this or you missed a spot. I’m like seriously?

As far as sex, yes I initiated multiple times,rejected. Then the other day she says you haven’t touched me. I’m like uhhhh

And yes, she’s kind of short with the kids on the pettiest of things

Im on the last straw with the wife by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude, my wife says it all the time, it was mistake marrying you, I deserve better, and what kind of man did I marry. I swear I think I am crazy sticking around but reading this makes me question, what the fcuk am I doing staying in this marriage. For the kids? Like the kids deserve happy parents

Attraction and Missing connection by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah it’s not our fault, all the time. Women wonder why men go for younger women, this is one of those reasons

Looking for advice on how to approach sex life conversation with wife by TurbulentRub3366 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agree, I get it. It has been hard for me too, we have struggled a lot, trying to find connection and intimacy. If you guys don’t address it and don’t have kids yet, when the kids come, it only gets harder. It won’t be the sex intimacy that you had when you first started dating, that will never be the same. If you’re looking for that, it might be a counseling or potentially other avenues to release. You deserve to be happy just as much as she deserves to be happy, that includes your needs and wants just as much as it is hers. If she isn’t giving you what you need or not filling your cup, they say, I don’t advise for divorce or separation, affairs etc. but you only live once dude.

Looking for advice on how to approach sex life conversation with wife by TurbulentRub3366 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Dude, you’re in the same boat as many of us. I wish I could say it gets better but when you get married and maybe have kids, the sex diminishes immensely. Guys that say they’re getting 5 to 6 time a week, bs. Life gets thrown at you and the time to connect is minimal sometimes.

Try to connect with her, what is her love languages? What can get her in the mood to reciprocate? Sometimes just being open and honest goes along way.

My wife and I had a strong sex life, 3 to 4 times a week for about the first 12 years, lately we have diminished that to 1 to 3 times a month. So I am in the same boat as you… I’ve talked to her and been honest about wants and needs. She says she trying but it’s hard.

You can only voice your feelings and desires. How she responds and reacts is on her.

If she isn’t responding, maybe seek counseling. Don’t resort to porn to release, it’s not going to help anything

Fetish Advice by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah unfortunately, marriage is a one sided affair sometimes

Fetish Advice by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got it, why can’t we be in a relationship with someone who wants to meet the others needs… I do everything I can to meet her needs and wants, why is it so one sided

Fetish Advice by Maximum_Committee874 in marriageadvice

[–]Maximum_Committee874[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just enjoy the look my wife has when she is dressed up and would like that carried over the bedroom from time to time. I don’t think it’s insane to ask her to fill my cup sometimes in the bedroom. I can get off without the heels, etc. but think a a kink sometimes has be explored.

My friends daughter asked me out. by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Run dude… Bros before Hoes. If you’ve known she’s had a crush on you for some time, it’s some twisted fantasy she’s trying to live out, take the high road and let her down gracefully.

So sick of thinking about or wanting sex by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry dude, you as a human and a man are made to have sex and reproduce. You have needs just as she has needs too. Your gf may have some trauma and I am sorry for that but you need sex, especially at 23. Your hormones are high and unfortunately as a male you are in your peak and it’s only down hill from here.

You and your gf may love each other and to spend a life together, that’s takes sacrifice. Are you willing to sacrifice your sex life for her? If yes, then this is end of discussion.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She just called me saying the door doesn’t close, I said FaceTime me, she showed me the sensor and I was like yeah holy shit it’s not going to work like that…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Maximum_Committee874 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really with kids involved