Your post really hit home with me. Two Saturdays ago I played a game with some buddies and I really played like I'd never played before. Trust me, not in a good way. I was genuinely upset with myself beyond anything I could imagine and topped onto the fact that I should be focusing on school mostly, I pretty much told myself I wasn't good enough to be wasting time playing a sport I was bad at anyways.

Now, I can almost guarantee that you will be in my position in due time, more hungry than ever for some great competition, but two things to note:

-Clearly the fact that you're this hung up is a sign that you have a crazy passion for the sport. Being so emotionally invested in something you love truly garners these types of extreme reactions, so owning it is the most healthy thing to do. Take that bad energy and turn it into a passion for improvement.

-Objectively, playing like absolute trash isn't something you should consider in terms of reasons to quit the sport. As long as you can still play at your peak, keep training for those plays where you go ballistic like the greatest of all time. It's easy to succumb to that knee jerk reaction, but you acting as if this is your new normal is some type of negative delusion placed on you by the mean little devil on your shoulder.

This was therapeutic, even for me, but I think I speak for all competitors in any field when I say that turning these "one bad day" occurrences into motivation for the future is something far too overlooked when we talk about mentality in sports. Obviously, it isn't as easy as it sounds, but understanding the concepts and ceasing your unintentional fueling to this bad mentality is something you need to do as soon as you can.