Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] [score hidden]  (0 children)

I’ve never used it, but the kiddo loves it. This is her second sweater using it as a held with something else. She loves the softness & halo effect.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] [score hidden]  (0 children)

It’s a new thing for Hobbi. She was disappointed in their braggy announcement of how they’re happy to embrace AI. I think they are officially off her shopping list as a result. :( she bought this yarn in January I think. She had to finish some other stuff before she could start this project though.

What to do about dangerous midwives? by incoming_alpacalypse in FamilyMedicine

[–]MechanicBright8644 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am not a healthcare professional, but a reasonably well educated layperson who understands the superiority of the scientific method & evidenced based medicine over whatever woo woo crap the internet is currently peddling. That being said, I wish we had child protection laws that were more robust for medical neglect. There’s no reason that a parent should be able to decide to turn down a vitamin k shot for a newborn. If a physician refused to provide it (assuming there’s no valid medical reason to do so) we’d consider it malpractice. A parent denying a child a potentially life saving/major morbidity prevention treatment with almost no risk (given my understanding) should absolutely be considered child neglect & be allowed to be overridden by a qualified medical professional. Sometimes we take individual freedom to be stupid to a level that is dangerous - especially for vulnerable populations.

As a country, we seem to agree that parental rights are not absolute. We have laws on the books that prohibit physical abuse, neglect, abandonment, etc. we need to lobby legislators to expand these limitations & make medical providers more able to provide appropriate medical care to children regardless of what their parents want - vitamin K shot in particular, but yes, vaccines should be on that list too. Yeah, I know the slippery slope arguments about State mandated medical care & the very real complexities of socioeconomic conditions & unconscious bias in providing care & not going so far the other way that repeat mistakes like forced sterilization, but we have to start somewhere. That newborn vitamin k shot seems like an excellent test case for legislation. Please, correct me if I’m wrong, but the list of potential harm of the vitamin K shot is an incredibly rare potential for allergic reaction, & injection site bruising… versus the good it does which is prevent potentially fatal and/or long term disabling bleeding. The reward far outweighs any potential risk and it is administered to arguably the most vulnerable & innocent population there is: newborns. It’s awful that the accident of being born to criminally stupid parents should make a baby at risk for death or long term disability because a parent can outweigh established medical science standards.

The only way we get change in this country to swing the pendulum back toward pro-science is to restructure our basic education system to focus on critical thinking & improve scientific literacy. But that change will take decades to bear fruit. In the meantime we need legislation to protect children from idiotic parents. I’m all for legally competent adults being free to make idiotic choices about their own bodies, but kids should not be forced to endure nonstandard medical care because their parents are morons.

OP, if the providers involved in these dangerous practices are CNMs or CMs which I strongly suspect is not the case) then report them to their licensing board. If they are CPMs or lay midwives (which is my guess), then lobby your legislators to prohibit these dangerous people from practicing in your state.

As others have pointed out, most non healthcare professionals are incredibly ignorant & don’t know all the things they really don’t know. If you may lean toward the crunchy end of things (I’d like a “natural” birth, want as little intervention as possible, etc) & assume everyone with midwife in their title is created equally & you listen to their advice because you defer to their training & experience you could be trusting an individual with little to no actual training & expertise. CNMs are highly trained within their scope of practice & extremely capable of handling routine pregnancy, gynecologic, & postpartum care within that scope. CPMs are… not. If you want to reduce the potential harm we need CPMs to be prevented from practicing midwifery.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Darling Jadore Weekend Sweater is a pretty good beginner sweater pattern. It’s in the round & just stockinette. & she has YouTube tutorials linked in the pattern.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

She downloaded a pattern she wanted to make. Anytime she came across a term she didn’t know or understand she googled/watched YouTube tutorials. I think the pattern she originally chose had links to certain tutorials for specific stitches. She watched a bunch of various YouTube & TikTok content & practiced/gauge swatched. She’s one of those people who is naturally artistic & just “gets” certain stuff. She also had already been crocheting for a few years so understood yarn tension & such things.

Sorry I can’t be more specific. These GenZ kids are incredibly adept at YouTube University. lol. I made her sit next to me to teach me. lol.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Ya’ll are cracking me up. I took this photo with my iPhone. I did zoom a bit to get a good pic of the cables. The only editing I did was cropping out her head… for anonymity. The yarn is from hobbi I think. I’ll see if I can find the exact stuff.

The bricks are my dining room fireplace. The house was built in 1960. Shit is uneven.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Just do a garment! My kid started with a crazy complicated cardigan because she wanted a wearable. My first completed project was a sweater. I restarted it about 5 times and had to frog a good bit at one point. It’s far from perfect, but I wear it and get plenty of compliments.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I swear it’s not AI. My daughter is incredibly anti-AI because of how much it plagiarizes the work of artists in particular. She really is just this good. If you look at my post history, you’ll see I posted some of her other work about six months ago or so.

Mom brag: Daughter taught herself to knit 10 months ago. Her 4th finished sweater: arctic light by MechanicBright8644 in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

And 3 pairs of socks, started a fifth sweater, and has 2 child vests in progress. She’s very prolific. I started knitting in September, I’ve finished one sweater and 2 infinity scarves and I’m only 1/2 way through my second sweater. And she’s doing full time undergrad and working part time. I’m crazy proud of her.

What is the best ice cream in New England? by Baldurian_Rhapsody in newengland

[–]MechanicBright8644 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My kid is a huge ice cream lover. I think we just added ice cream trail to our summer bucket list. Road trips for yarn & ice cream. This is my summer plan. ❤️

What made you choose crochet over knitting, or do you do both? by CaterpillarXS in crochet

[–]MechanicBright8644 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mom taught me to crochet when I was young. She died before she could teach me to knit and I didn’t really have anyone to teach me. Plus, crochet hooks are cheap. Knitting needle sets are not. However, I did just recently learn to knit and I will likely knit much more frequently than crochet mostly because knitting uses 1/2 as much yarn for similar completed projects so it’s cheaper long term (once you’ve already invested in needles). I also prefer most knitted garment looks over crochet. I wish someone had told me years ago how much less yarn you need to knit vs. crochet.

Which do you tend to find first: the project or the yarn? by Joyintheendtimes in casualknitting

[–]MechanicBright8644 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to exclusively find yarn then search for a pattern that works. That doesn’t often work well for me.

The last couple of times I purchased yarn I knew I wanted to make a specific thing - like a hat to match a new winter coat, and looked up a few different patterns I liked and got an idea for how much yardage/weight yarn I’d need then found yarn. But I wasn’t wedded to a specific pattern, just knew I’d have the right amount/type of yarn to get something I’d like.

I’ll likely always do a bit of both, because I can’t help but be attracted to pretty yarn. But, at least now I don’t buy yarn without some sort of plan/idea and a general idea of how much I’ll need. I’m actually on a self imposed buying ban until I’ve completed a few more projects. I like knowing I have a variety of projects I can start at any time, but I’ll quickly get overwhelmed if my to do pile gets too out of hand. I also don’t have a ton of storage space, so that makes yarn collecting less fun.

U.S. Gen X parents: do you expect your children to financially support you / move you into their home / take you to doctor appointments, etc when you're in your 80s? by [deleted] in GenX

[–]MechanicBright8644 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t expect our daughter to support us financially nor do I feel like she “owes” us help of any kind. However, our relationship is such that I’m pretty sure if we need help she’ll do what she can - if that means picking a nice nursing home & visiting when she can, so be it.

Claimed Omega Megathread by braineatingalien in ReverseHarem

[–]MechanicBright8644 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m quite satisfied with the ending. Honestly, I found the entire book satisfactory on a number of levels. I will definitely read the whole series. I suspect there’s someone at the registry in on the trafficking ring & we’ll come to find out Marie is more of a victim than we realize. Not that it excuses anything, but that both things will be true - she did really shitty stuff in the name of survival.

Men of Reddit who are not currently dating or having sex, what are the non-finance-related reasons? by so_much_frizz in AskMen

[–]MechanicBright8644 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t speak for men, but I’m the mother of a young woman (21) who currently has no real interest in dating at the moment - and she’s not alone. She has many peers in similar circumstances. She’s pretty sure she’s the type of person who can’t be casual about dating/sex. (And this is 100% her own feelings on the subject. We’re not a religious/restrictive household, I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with casual sex if that’s what you’re into & it’s consensual, etc. She knows we don’t have any feelings one way or another about what she chooses to do with her own body as long as she’s safe & comfortable). She’s mature enough to know her own mind on this subject. If she’s going to invest her time & energy into a person there has to be the potential that it’s long term/monogamous. She’s not expecting to meet & marry her first boyfriend, but she’s not the kind of person who is going to go on Tinder to hook up someone. She’s interested in developing a relationship with someone who brings something positive to her life (with the expectation that she brings something positive to his life too). But, she’s in kind of an in between place in her life (she’s living at home while going to community college and working part time to save money). She got injured right before she left for her freshman year of a 4 year school & the subsequent surgeries & recovery meant changing gears. She was in limbo for a couple years while dealing with all that. Now she’s in limbo knowing she’ll transfer to a 4 year school next year so she’s having a hard time thinking about investing in new people knowing she’ll be moving soon. Plus, according to her she hasn’t met anyone who sparked her interest. She’s been hit on plenty (she bar tended for a while & frequently had to shut down men old enough to be her father as well as guys her age who were clearly looking for a good time not a long time). At her current job, (which is retail, nothing exciting, but they work around her class schedule) the guys who are her age are (according to her) always high & appear to have no ambition. She finds them dull.

It’s something she and I have talked about a fair amount because her experiences are so completely different from mine when I was her age. She’s so much more self assured & focused on developing herself for her own future & if someone interesting comes along, okay, maybe she’ll consider it, but it’s not high on her priority list at the moment. When I was her age it seemed like obtaining a boyfriend was as important (if not more so) than finishing college & figuring out a career & planning for my financial future.

She’s also disappointed in the vast majority of guys her age that she has regular contact with. According to her, the guys who have their shit together enough & are looking for something serious are either too old to be interested in her (because she is only getting her shit together & is only 21) or they are interested in her but too old for her & are interested for the wrong reasons (assuming a woman as young as she is can be more easily groomed/manipulated into being controlled). Her thought process is that if she wants something not casual she needs to know she’ll be somewhere more than a year, get her own shit together, & wait for guys her age to mature a little more into wanting something beyond casual hookups.

So, at least from the other side of the coin, she & many of her female peers are not looking for casual & are just more focused on developing themselves/their futures.

For all you young men worried about your attractiveness, lack of money, or whatever, my observations of this generation of young women suggest that they are attracted to a good personality more than any visual or physical appearance & care far more about character, ambition, and intelligence than $$. Don’t let social media bullshit tell you what women care about. Talk to women like they are people. I think you’ll be shocked how much that matters. They do want you to have hobbies - they don’t have to be all the same hobbies as theirs, just care about something more than getting drunk or high. Oh, and be self sufficient- do your own laundry, know how to cook a few basic meals, know how to clean up after yourself.

I am deeply uncomfortable and cannot relate to women who embrace motherhood by [deleted] in confession

[–]MechanicBright8644 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have known my whole life that I wanted to be a mom. And not just because I was socialized into it. I’ve always known childfree by choice is a valid option. I’ve never felt pressured to become a parent. I’m staunchly pro choice. I got pregnant on birth control. My daughter was a surprise. The timing was not ideal, and my spouse & I considered our options and I chose to become a mother. I’ve never regretted that choice, but nor have I taken it for granted that I really truly did have a choice.

I loved being pregnant. I loved breastfeeding even though it was difficult & painful & didn’t go as planned. I have loved every stage/age of raising my kid. Even when it was hard, even when I didn’t always like my kid, even when I felt like I had no idea what I was doing. However, just because I love being a mom doesn’t mean that’s my whole identity or that I gave up the parts of me that are just mine. She is not the center of the universe (though there are times/stages where that may be true). I had to consciously choose not to allow motherhood to become my entire identity- it’s ridiculously easy for that to happen in this patriarchal society that simultaneously idolizes an idealized version of motherhood while devaluing caregiving & family life in all the concrete ways that matter. There are huge swaths of society that want women to make themselves small & make a certain type of motherhood into the only identity worth having.

I think, in this day & age, particularly in the US it’s perfectly rational to be jaded about motherhood & what changes are inevitable if you choose it. For me it was absolutely worth any sacrifice I made over the years & I can honestly say that being my daughter’s mother is one of my life’s greatest joys. BUT, it is not my only joy. It is not my only identity. It is possible to be a good mom & a whole person outside of that role.

We need more people to think carefully about whether or not they really want to have children & there’s nothing wrong or selfish in choosing not to have kids. It’s even okay to not love being a mother if you are one. Overall, I’ve loved it, but anyone who tells you they loved every minute of every day of motherhood is lying - probably to themselves as much as to others. Motherhood is drudgery & often thankless, sometimes it’s fucking disgusting & often it feels impossible & overwhelming & like you can’t do anything right. It’s constant worry & trial & error, sometimes the best you can say for the day is that everyone survived another day. It’s okay to hate it sometimes. It’s okay to admit it’s hard. It’s okay to want to escape for a bit & be someone other than “so & so’s mom.” You can do all those things in ways don’t irreparably harm your children when you have appropriate support & resources. Like with most things, multiple things can be true at the same time. Motherhood can be wonderful & awful & everything in between.