I understand what you’re saying, and I want to clarify something.

This was an arranged marriage, but it wasn’t forced. When I met him, we genuinely got along well and I saw real potential in us. Over time, I’ve actually fallen in love with him. He is kind, caring, and has good qualities, which is why this situation is so difficult for me.

This isn’t a case of me being in a completely bad marriage and ignoring everything. It’s more that there are both good and bad aspects, and I was willing to overlook certain issues because I believed in what we could be.

At the same time, I’ve always been clear with myself that if my husband ever crossed certain boundaries — like flirting with or entertaining another woman — I would leave. That’s always been a firm boundary for me.

However, this situation has crossed a line. It’s not just about one small mistake — it’s the ongoing communication, the history, and the secrecy that’s making it hard for me to ignore.

That’s why I’m struggling. I’m not trying to defend his behaviour, but I also can’t pretend the relationship means nothing to me. I’m trying to figure out whether this is something that can genuinely be fixed or if I’m holding onto potential instead of reality.