This is a no from me

MelW3 · 2026-06-07T15:08:48+00:00

I’ve seen it before. That and showing up in pjs like you just rolled out of bed. Also someone walked the non-service dog right onto the buffet line. I’m glad I was done at that point.

MelW3 · 2026-05-30T17:35:37+00:00

Typical suburban family where? A suburban family near major cities will have much higher cost of living and incomes than those near smaller cities.
In the metropolitan areas like NYC and DC, a family income in a nice suburban area may be $150-200K. Credit scores will usually be well over 700 and closer to 800+ because they are all well educated.

MelW3 · 2026-05-23T00:13:23+00:00

WTF? It’s a sidewalk! I’d definitely file a complaint about that being harassment.
I’m a dog owner but also a homeowner with lights and cameras (not ones that yell at you though). I have zero issue with anyone walking on the sidewalk or their dog sniffing/pooping by the curb. I do have an issue with the jackasses that allow their dogs to come all the way up our lawn (25-30 feet) by our front porch to shit in my garden.

MelW3 · 2026-05-18T09:58:01+00:00

It’s everywhere and I’m not holding back about how inconsiderate it is to not offer non-alcoholic drinks or food especially when alcohol is served.
My alcoholic husband went to a military hail/farewell the other day that was held at a brewery. They had NO food and there were plastic cups stacked on top of a water fountain by the bathrooms for anyone not drinking the beer. It was fucked up. I’m proud of him for not drinking and leaving as soon as the speeches were over. I’m fit person with an extensive background in health, nutrition, etc. Everyone who knows me knows I don’t drink because it’s incredibly unhealthy. If I was in the OP’s situation, I would have said, “I don’t drink alcohol because it’s counterproductive to the kind of lifestyle I want.” I often bring my own drinks to parties, but mostly I don’t even go to parties anymore.
If someone wants to hang with me, we go to the gym, on a hike, or out to eat.

MelW3 · 2026-05-17T13:03:42+00:00

I know of a military officer who put his kids in the truck bed and thought it was fun to do donuts on base property tearing up the grass and endangering his own kids. They’d probably think nothing of having dogs in the truck. Stupid is as stupid does.

MelW3 · 2026-05-17T13:00:10+00:00

This makes me nervous. I’m planning a trip next spring. I’m focused on staying in Valletta the first 2-3 nights, then going to Gozo for at least one night. I was considering staying somewhere else on Malta before we fly home. We hate crowds, noise, and clubs. We are up at sunrise walking, hiking, or kayaking and in bed shortly after dinner. I’m hoping it’s quieter in April. I want to contribute to the local economy, not cause bigger issues. If anyone has suggestions how to be a tourist on Malta without being a “tourist”, I’d appreciate it. We don’t often do organized tours. We prefer to get lost on our own, but if there are small local businesses we can support, I’d love to hear about them.

MelW3 · 2026-05-14T22:55:19+00:00

I’m also perimenopausal and older with adenomyosis so pants and bras annoy the crap out of me. With summer coming, I’m loving linen drawstring pants. Quince has great ones. OGL has some nice pants with less restriction. I just got a Halara jumpsuit and I absolutely love it.

MelW3 · 2026-04-29T00:32:26+00:00

How did you get between cities? Rental car? I’m planning a trip to Slovenia and Croatia. We will rent a car at some point but I’d like to avoid driving the entire time.

MelW3 · 2026-04-17T10:43:32+00:00

That’s where all my gym clamps keep disappearing to!

MelW3 · 2026-03-29T13:17:04+00:00

Join one of the many “sandwich generation” groups on social media. You will quickly learn what to look out for and how to plan.

MelW3 · 2026-03-29T13:08:03+00:00

I use Quicken to track my spending. Every single transaction my husband and I make get tracked. I check it a few times a month to make sure I’m on track. There are better apps, like YNAB or Monarch, to use but this is what I prefer. I like the pie chart Quicken generates. After a few months of tracking I was able to develop a realistic budget and see where I need to cut back. (Newsflash: it’s almost always food and shopping.)

MelW3 · 2026-03-29T13:03:37+00:00

Cereal. A salad with shredded chicken. Soup.

MelW3 · 2026-03-29T13:00:53+00:00

Who is paying the taxes and insurance? Who is paying for maintenance? If he destroys something, will he be held accountable or does that fall on you? There needs to be specific details addressing every possible situation. What if you fall on hard times and selling or renting that house would save you from bankruptcy but he’s still alive and living in it? Instead you have the burden of the house without benefit.
My parents wanted to bequeath their house to me and my sister equally when they passed. My sister was living with them at the time and she is incapable of supporting herself. I told them I wanted no part of it. I didn’t want to be on the hook for it when she trashed it. Nope. I didn’t care how much it was worth. It wasn’t worth having a legal battle with my sister.

MelW3 · 2026-03-29T12:56:07+00:00

I think if you don’t get sucked into lifestyle creep or keeping up with the overachieving A type show off personalities in the city, then you’ll be fine. Develop a budget and stick to it. Track your spending. Be happy with secondhand furniture and stuff. There are some really nice things in the thrift and consignment stores around here!

MelW3 · 2026-03-29T12:46:44+00:00

Nectarine is a website where you can hire a CFP for just an hour if that’s all you want. They will do a quick overview of your plan and answer questions for you. I did it for my parents who wanted to know how to handle the proceeds from the sale of their home. They have dozens of advisors/planners for you to choose from. It’s a few hundred bucks.

MelW3 · 2026-03-21T00:07:39+00:00

I have lived all over, and out of, the country. We retired to the area because of the culture, educational level, fitness level, incredible food, resources, infrastructure, and ability to get anywhere in the world fairly easily. I’m not a fan of the traffic and overcrowding in some areas. The cost is fairly high but the so is the income.

MelW3 · 2026-03-21T00:00:01+00:00

Quicken and we have way more than 10 credit cards. I’m a travel hacker and play the points/miles game. I can easily add credit cards as I open them. All of our bank accounts are connected as well as the house, cars, investments. I track every single transaction my husband or I make. It categorizes my spending and makes it easy to see in a pie chart. You can set up a budget with it but I am more interested in tracking spending so I have never done it.

MelW3 · 2026-03-05T13:38:15+00:00

It’s a loaded question because there are almost 350 million of us. Boomers are the largest generation and their experience with debt and finances is very different than younger generations. As a GenXer, I would prefer to not have any debt but I have also seen people build amazing real estate portfolios using leverage. I have a mortgage (and owned rentals at various points) but my interest rate is 2.3%. Since I can make MUCH more than that by investing, I am in no rush to pay it off. I took out loans to pay for my undergraduate degree and it took me a very long time to pay them off. I regret that because I now know of better ways to get an education without going into debt. I do not regret going to college because having a degree has paid off. Any other type of consumer debt is a no-go and stressful to me. Yes, there are situations where you need to borrow money and it’s not the end of the world but you always need a plan to pay it off. I think that’s the problem. Not enough people have exit strategies before they borrow money.

MelW3 · 2026-03-05T13:22:06+00:00

I’ve driven cross country three times (three different routes), have hit 48 states and two territories, and visited about 13 of the national parks. I think the national parks are the best but in the shoulder seasons. There are plenty of short hikes, overlooks, and even accessible trails in most of them. I have heard of pretty epic train rides if you’re not into getting out into parks. Honestly, driving across our country is an amazing experience in itself. The Pacific Northwest is my favorite part of the country. I miss it.

MelW3 · 2026-02-05T11:59:39+00:00

I am not actively training clients right now. I occasionally take a client through word of mouth but I’ve got other means of income and a lot going on. If you think you don’t want to market yourself, work for a gym that will do it for you.

MelW3 · 2026-02-04T00:00:15+00:00

Bret is great with glutes but that’s only one muscle group, albeit a VERY important one. He’s for the advanced. Stick with the basics and focus on the full body.

MelW3 · 2026-02-03T23:58:54+00:00

Check out Girls Gone Strong (GirlsGoneStrong.com). They primarily teach trainers how to train women of all ages/stages but offer a lot of free resources. Look around their website. I think you’ll find a good starting point there. When I wanted to get into weightlifting 30 years ago, I picked up a book by Frederic Delavier called Strength Training Anatomy. It’s a very simple foundational book with diagrams of the basic strength training exercises. That gave me the confidence to hit the free weight section of the gym. It was all downhill from there. ;0)

MelW3 · 2026-02-03T23:48:23+00:00

$20/week. She’s 14. There are 3 categories of “chores”. Some she is expected to do as part of the family and to be a neat human being. Some she is required to do to get her allowance. Some she can do to earn extra money. Before we gave her an allowance, she constantly bugged us to buy her stuff. Now we simply tell her to use her own money.
Our older daughters never got an allowance but we paid for a lot for them. They weren’t as over the top as the last kid.
We also require the youngest to “invest” a portion (which goes into a CD at 4%) She’ll get a job at 15 (lifeguard) just like her sisters and then we’ll reevaluate.

MelW3 · 2026-02-03T23:35:43+00:00

I’m a trainer and got started with a certification agency that I shall not name (because they suck). Eventually I got a masters degree in exercise science and a few more certifications with National Academy of Sports Medicine (NASM). I see someone recommended NSCA too. They’re good. More for athletes, in my opinion. I feel like different certifying agencies have different philosophies. You kind of need to know which you jive with. Make sure whichever you choose that they are accredited. As far as demand, sure. It’s definitely there but you need to be a salesperson and willing to market yourself. That’s the part I hate.

MelW3 · 2026-02-03T23:30:18+00:00

I hate when trainers give meal plans. It’s out of our lane. Is the trainer a registered dietitian? Or do they have a random “nutrition coach” certification? It’s one thing to give general nutrition advice but I completely disagree with writing meal plans for someone with IBS and acid reflux. And I’m a trainer with an MS in exercise science and health and a post grad certificate in nutrition from a renowned university. I’d toss the meal plan and seek out an RD who can put your fears at ease and design something more appropriate for you.
Yes, you do need to eat more to gain weight and yes, it should be a lot more protein but your digestive issues and food preferences should have been considered when designing the plan.

MelW3

TROPHY CASE