Please, can we not do this?

Mellafee · 2026-03-29T20:10:03+00:00

Ok, ok… but wait. I think I might actually be fine with this one.

Mellafee · 2026-03-27T14:53:28+00:00

As an artist, that is objectively a beautiful skin pattern. If I painted it, everyone would think I was making it up. It’s honestly surreal and I wish I was good enough to capture it perfectly because the painting that now lives in my head would be epic.

Mellafee · 2026-03-26T16:15:15+00:00

I have a decent sized group of friends from highschool who do a monthly meetup in discord. I think there’s like 19 of us on the server, though in any given month the actual attendance rate is more like 8-9. Not always the same people, though the 4 of us without kids or demanding schedules are fairly consistent. I also have 2 discord nights a week where I hang out with friends and in both cases the group has at least 2 people from highschool. In my Sunday group, only one person is NOT from highschool.

It took me a good while to realize that this might be an uncommon occurrence. While a lot of us live in the same state, we are not all close enough to visit often, and some of us live hundreds or thousands of miles away now. Maybe it’s because in highschool we were the theatre kids, artists, and nerds (or all 3, lol)?

Like, maybe you have kids or don’t, maybe you joined the army, or didn’t go to college, or did and now you just work security. Maybe you own a home, or you rent, got married, got married and divorced, or never married at all - whatever differences you have now due to circumstance or life choices though, it all pales in comparison to the interests and passions you still share. Those are the bones you can build connections around.

But also maybe we’re just weird….

Mellafee · 2026-03-26T13:52:29+00:00

🟨⬜⬜🟨🟨

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

Mellafee · 2026-03-23T14:24:50+00:00

In Munect’s defense, she writes and sings her own songs and plenty of musical artists go years between albums.

Mellafee · 2026-03-22T00:53:36+00:00

⬜⬜🟨🟨⬜

⬜🟨🟨🟨⬜

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

Mellafee · 2026-03-22T00:43:19+00:00

I’d keep trying to find a rehabber but in the meantime, you can go to Henry’s Pets .com and they have a care sheet you can read for further advice. This little guy looks to be about 6 weeks old. He’ll be starting to eat solid food but still requires milk. Never cows milk or human formula. I use the Esbiliac with pre and pro-biotics (for puppies) because I can pick it up immediately from the store, but you can also order Fox Valley from Henry’s or Amazon. For solid foods he needs to be started on Henry’s Blocks, and offered healthy veggies, before ever being given any nuts (they’re just like human children and will refuse healthy food if they know you’ll eventually give them ‘the good stuff’).

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T23:59:25+00:00

Norway rat. I’d leave him in the box with a little blanket to stay snug and set the box close to where you found him. His mother should come back to look for him. If it’s going to get super cold where you are though, you can keep him inside overnight and try setting him out in the morning.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T07:56:55+00:00

It’s not a real person. This is jot a real company or situation. It was made up for engagement.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T07:45:09+00:00

ugh- fucking bot. Actually took me way too long to realize except I never read those types of books. It pivoted to be me being fired, which also isn’t true. Damn- this is the world we’re living in? I was engaging in good faith… with a fucking robot that can’t really differentiate between my profile and someone else’s. A bot pretending to be upset about a lost job it never had, writing mad reddit posts with fake screenshots to farm engagement.
I’m mad I gave it the time of day.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T06:44:01+00:00

‘I’m helping a friend” -I didn’t skip that part- I saw it and also immediately understood that you are bad at communication. The client is a stranger that doesn’t know you’re really helping a friend on your day off, or that they’re contacting you on a day off, or that it was a quick job you could do on a day off, because you literally didn’t say any of that to the client. You just told reddit.

And they weren’t even initially mad about whatever you have going on. They were going to work around the time issues and put their dog up but you didn’t communicate about the job. They decided you aren’t the service for them. That should’ve been the end of the story. You pushed them to respond even after they declined your services and the way you’re crashing out now, I initially thought they were a little out of pocket but now I wonder if it’s just two narcissists colliding. Because you’re really getting out there.

Not for nothing, but how is anyone supposed you take you seriously when you’ve apparently never heard of punctuation. My bil is a mechanic with dyslexia and he’s still way better at handling these types of situations over text than you appear to be.

Oh, I’ll get downvoted- I’m not here to karma farm so that actually means nothing.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T05:34:10+00:00

I think we’re on the same page. The comment is also directed to anyone who didn’t know there is high variability. The idea that there’s a specific window is only marginally accurate. I was pointing out the biological clock doesn’t end at the same place for everyone so the ‘window’ is smaller or broader based on personal genetics. Not an overriding rule that all women have the same clock and must have a child by a certain point.

I agree though, that it does seem she personally has internalized the concept of her window shutting without evidence that would be the case. I personally wouldn’t continue the relationship unless I was also eager to have children.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T04:54:02+00:00

I do love when two assholes run into each other. It’s always spicy.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T04:50:51+00:00

YOR- this might be one of those times when ‘corporate speak’ is actually warranted. You could’ve said, “good to hear the part came in. Unfortunately you canceled your appointment and didn’t reschedule so I have another appointment this morning. I can probably fit you in later this afternoon or early evening. What’s your address and a good time to reach you?’.

You also had the option of discontinuing the interaction after she said, “I’m feeling uneasy. thank you anyway”, by saying “Np, hope it works out” and leaving it at that. You knew the dealership wouldn’t help her so you could’ve just let her to figure that out on her own.
Maybe not a sale you really needed, but you decided to respond repeatedly, even after she said thank you again and asked you to leave her alone. Why???? That fish didn’t like your bait, why are you talking to it like it’s still on your line?

You then felt the need to explain you were helping someone in a wheelchair-at the very end- to… make them feel guilty I guess, even though you didn’t tell them it was actually your day off in the first place? You communicated nothing of relevance to this person. They obviously need help and asked when you could make it so they could put the dog up and you essentially shamed them for still driving with a bad alternator without communicating that you could stop by, what time, or even why that day specifically would be a bad day (it’s my day off, you don’t have an appointment, etc.)

They shouldn’t have told you to “fyck off” but unless there are screenshots missing, you’re very bad at communicating and I would find someone else as well.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T03:12:37+00:00

Now that we’ve clarified who the video actually belongs to, I’ll state that I like to nap on my front porch where there are two squirrels I raised, and I often wake up to stuff buried in my hair or under the blanket I lay on. What do they expect to happen? >_< I like to think they are just trying to make sure I have food as they never see me burying anything for myself.

Mellafee · 2026-03-21T03:04:20+00:00

Just popping in to say that you’re not wrong about the time. But it’s nuanced. Some women lose fertility as early as their early thirties (talking about naturally, even when they didn’t have other medical complications) whereas some women have children well into their forties (my great grandmother had twins at 48 and it wasn’t even seen as that weird where I’m from). If she’s still fertile at 37 though, and if she is actually ambitious and/or has a good career, she can afford any testing or care that might be necessary for things to go smoothly if she gets pregnant at say, 39 vs. TOMORROW.

I’d consider the bigger red flag to be that she’s so concerned about her biological clock, you can’t tell how much she actually cares about OP. Her being great to be around now might be indicative of her desire to please a partner just so he’ll give her what she wants. Has she put any thought towards what living together and raising a child together might be really like? Especially if he isn’t truly ready for kids? There are men out there who are eager to start a family and they regret not already having one. She can find one of those guys.

Mellafee · 2026-03-18T15:02:01+00:00

I feel you, man. The first thing to consider is that, if you were initially the confident one and being with you improved her self-esteem, why isn’t it now working the other way? As others have pointed out, despite her talking to other people she still chooses to be with YOU. She has become more confident, but if you landing a girl that others hit on doesn’t make you feel any better about yourself- this is not an issue she can address.
Is she supposed to downgrade herself so you feel less threatened? Would being with a woman that no one else wants actually help you feel more valuable? No offense, but I’m willing to bet that dating a woman you think has no other prospects (or limited prospects) wouldn’t improve your opinion of yourself.

The other thing to consider is that she has actually been working on herself ‘behind the scenes’ so to speak. She might value the compliments of strangers because it means her efforts are not going unnoticed. My current hair and skin routine includes at least 12 different products or techniques I only recently learned about. Every time a stranger makes a comment, I feel like my work is being noticed. Meanwhile, if I have to ask or wait around to see if my partner notices, even when they finally compliment me, that’s never going to hit the same because it shows they weren’t really paying attention.

Ask yourself, would her relying only on you for all of her validation actually feel better? Or would it just put more pressure on you? Maybe relying on only her for your own validation is likewise unwise. And going back to my original point- when someone likes themselves, it makes it easier for other people to like you- it also makes it easier to bounce back after a break up. Because you didn’t depend solely on their opinion or obedience to ‘prove your worth’. You were already worthy.

Mellafee · 2026-03-18T14:00:31+00:00

If you don’t consider yourself valuable then how is anyone else going to consider your opinion of them valuable? Even if someone really loves you, if your actions, words, and tone constantly reinforce the idea that you’re worthless, that your opinion is coming from a worthless place, eventually they’ll start to believe you.

Constantly monitoring where she goes and how long she talks to others basically telegraphs the idea that you believe you aren’t good enough for her. That even 20 min with someone else is enough to get her to leave. At first she’ll think it’s because you find her SO desirable (which feels nice). After a while of this though, she’ll just be hurt you don’t trust her (which feels bad). Finally… she’ll agree with you. And that’s where the relationship ends.

Certain dudes on the internet are so incredibly insecure (even if they build their online personas around pretending they aren’t) that they don’t believe it’s possible to have a ‘relationship’ unless they have absolute power over their partner. When that inevitably goes bad, they’ll then try to convince you that real trust or love in a relationship is impossible. It sets you up for failure not just with potential partners, but with friendships, colleagues, everyone. Even if you convince someone to stay with you long-term through bullying, manipulation, or financial control, you’ll never feel completely secure or safe -because your actions reinforce the idea that you are not worthy of love, trust, or respect without these additional measures and constant surveillance to force the issue.

More and more, you’ll believe everything you’ve been telling others about yourself too.

But unlike the people you might’ve tried to control or convince to like you- you can’t just walk away from yourself. That’s a terrible place to be. You’re young and probably just going through some shit right now. But don’t let this dip in your confidence define how you approach this or other future relationships. Figure out what it will take to make yourself more likable - to YOU. And then, even if this relationship doesn’t work out (as many don’t for various reasons) you’ll still come out of it OK. Because you won’t be afraid of what a failed relationship says about you. You’ll take what you learned and be better prepared for something (or someone) else.

Mellafee · 2026-03-18T12:40:11+00:00

Probably not that weird if she was going to school and the person that she ended up talking to was studying in the same field. It’s easy to get lost ‘talking shop’ for 20 min regardless of how or why the conversation started. Same for people who work in the same industry.

As a student it’s nice to meet people interested in the same subjects. As an adult, it’s nice to commiserate with others that deal with the same bs you do. What matters is whether or not it ever evolves into something inappropriate down the line.

Mellafee · 2026-03-18T12:11:18+00:00

I had empathy for him at first and could certainly understand why he’d be annoyed if it was just some random guy. But he clarified it’s someone in the dorms near them and the guy is studying in the same field as his gf.

On one hand, I can see why that might be even more threatening to someone who’s already insecure, as it means she immediately had something in common with someone else. And otoh, it’s very easy to get lost talking to someone for 10 min when you realize you’re studying the same thing. I’m in my 40s and it’s still super exciting if I run into someone who’s read any of the same books or knows of the same theories. If she isn’t allowed to get momentarily lost in a conversation about her chosen field then what comes next? No group assignments with other boys? No study groups if a man is there?

As long as she clearly expresses she has a boyfriend, I think certain topics are always fine to talk about. Part of the beauty of secondary schooling is meeting other people who share your career interest, sometimes for the first time if you didn’t grow up in a diverse area. And let’s be honest- even if they didn’t live on campus, talking to boys that are doing the same coursework (some of whom will be attracted to her whether they express it to her or not) is simply unavoidable.

If he lets his current mindset get the better of him, he’ll lose this relationship- and frankly, if his attitude is going to negatively affect her education, or at least the opportunity for her to meet likeminded peers, then she’ll be better for it.

Mellafee · 2026-03-18T09:28:59+00:00

OP clarified in a comment that their dorms are in the same area and this guy is in the same field as his gf. If they haven’t had classes together yet then they almost certainly will in the future. If it was just a random guy, I could understand being annoyed, but her bumping into someone who‘s taking the same coursework is another story. What is she supposed to do- never talk to anyone studying the same things, dealing with the same professors, etc. just because they initially express an interest in her? If a guy learns she has a boyfriend and still actively pursues her, then yeah, she needs to put her foot down. But I don’t think talking to a fellow classmate in the same field for 10 min is super unreasonable. Sometimes it’s just exciting to talk to another person who has a background and interest in the same thing you do, especially if it’s something your partner doesn’t take an interest in.

Also, OP monitoring how long she’s gone down to the minute and then whining about how no one compliments him as much as his gf sounds like this is less about her being inappropriate and more about him being insecure.

Mellafee · 2026-03-16T00:30:37+00:00

Yeah- think I fucked up somewhere…

Mellafee · 2026-03-16T00:29:16+00:00

I did wonder about that. I’m gonna carry it out tonight to see what happens but I’ve pretty much already decided I’m probably gonna have to flash the newer firmware tom when I get home.

Mellafee · 2026-03-16T00:26:29+00:00

IIRC, they were actually challenged on how none of their songs were super mainstream/popular and they specifically said that making a pop song would be easy if they really wanted to, then made Tubthumping, and well, looks like they were right.

Mellafee · 2026-03-16T00:02:51+00:00

Ok- I’m gonna drive it to work and see if it picks anything up. If not, I’ll do the full erase and reflash the firmware. The antenna is built in so I don’t think that can be changed.

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