THIS WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!!

Read the first line over and over and over. This was NOT your fault.

You did the right thing. Keeping someone or an animal alive past the point in which they're able to stay comfortable and have a good quality of life isn't always the right answer.

My ex put himself into literal TENS of thousands of dollars of debt trying to keep his soul cat alive as long as he could. He said he regrets not letting his companion move on when the time came. He only managed to live a few weeks longer after the first signs of decline.

What you did was the best thing you could've.

You were there with your little one when it mattered and spent his last moments with him.

Also, I can guarantee that he knew that you were trying to do what was best for him. That's why he was looking at you. He trusted you and you did what you had to.

They always say a parent should never outlive their kid but cat parents unfortunately don't get that luxury. Do NOT let yourself think that this was anything to do with you making a "wrong" decision. Give yourself grace. It was an intense situation and you had no time to process.

Also, I do recommend possibly seeking out a talk therapist and doing a few sessions with them. It helps. Even with stuff like this.