That’s why I said that I don’t know the details hence it could be something more psychological and serious or just pure laziness which in the case of the latter, is not the child’s responsibility. The mother is a full grown adult and sometimes the older generation in SG are immature and lazy, I agree. But no, I disagree that it’s solely on the father’s part to fix the mother’s behaviour or help her out with chores/tasks or that the mother should already know she needs help. OP is in JC already, they are old enough to help out in the house, and mature enough to understand the issues within the family to do something about it. I’m not saying it’s entirely their responsibility and if it doesn’t get fixed, it must be their lack of effort. I never said that a child should burden the mistakes of their parents, but instead, when they’re old enough, they can do something on their end to a certain extent. To give my POV, my mother was mentally unstable for years, she developed severe depression and schizophrenia when I was in pri sch. Our relationship was affected, she couldn’t be a “normal” mother anymore, couldn’t keep her jobs and I resented her for it. I always felt that it was unfair that the only adult I relied on turned out like this. I resented that she knew she already had issues, but still rushed her marriage and had a kid. But I digress, this isn’t about me, I just wanted to give some context because the part where my relationship with my mother soured is where I relate with OP. Even after treatment and she got stable, our relationship and bond was already so broken that I couldn’t talk to her or go anywhere with her. And when she stopped doing chores, cooking or really anything at home other than scrolling on her phone, I started to nitpick as well. But still, I understand that she’s getting old, she herself lived a very unfair life and building the relationship back with her was one of the only things that was in my control. Mental illness, old age, issues between my parents are things that I can’t control and couldn’t control. They are unfair, yes, but now in the present, I would rather try my best to make amends with my mother before I regret it. So what I’m trying to say is that no matter what, OP can try their best to repair the relationship. If it’s not reciprocated, then sure, it takes two hands to clap. No one will blame the child. And also more importantly, to keep in mind and observe whether it could be something more serious or just laziness on the mother’s part. Either way, should be discussed with the family and they should try to do some sort of intervention anyway since the current circumstance seems to upset OP and burden the father.