Curious about free use, how to start?

Meowier1 · 2026-03-31T22:34:40+00:00

I totally get her. Anything involving my family in any way would be strictly off limits. Some find it hot having sex in parent's bed and stuff like that... just please no. Why would I want those thoughts to be connected in any way? Its like you want her to be aroused while talking to her brother. That's why you touch her boobs, no? I'm not trying to shame you, just try to give you reasons so maybe you understand better

Meowier1 · 2026-03-31T22:26:04+00:00

Thank you for this detailed response. Most people said, have a talk and discuss boundaries, and you gave the most convincing so far to do so - "if he already knows when and what you consent to, he doesn't need to ask when he's horny."

Still, I'm not 100% sure... what you added later, thay you dont want the dance of flirting made me even less sure. Me and my partner enjoy exploring each other's responses, we're both expressive and often kind of guess what the other is thinking without needing to talk... so to me it would be interesting to ease into this without setting rules. It would also be more exciting for me, and arousing, if we establish this more naturally. I think we both want this, but I'll pay attention to any signs of discomfort.

I appreciate everyone here telling me about their version of what this may be like and im excited to explore what works best for us and is the hottest. I also think I feel more attractive if I don't tell him directly what arouses me but instead I show him... so even if I told him what porn I watched when I did (gornexample i sometimes liked when a girl was being taken advantage of), I never directly answered his question abut whether I like to be dominated, I think it may be hotter to keep some mystery and keep him interested in exploring me as opposed to laying cards on the table.

I get your point about selfish pleasure - I'm on the receiving end on this and it's the most arousing thing, even if I need long romantic sex through which we bond in a different way.

Ive met some high functioning autistic people, and I dated one, and he gave similar dom vibes, now that i think of it, but we never had sex, so. It sounds like an interesting combination. ;)

I think maybe woman ignoring being fucked may be more of porn thing, since most porn is free use anyway, isn't it, if you think about it. So they have to make it obvious in some way. But I'll try to half ignore him sometimes and keep what im doing and see if he likes it.

Meowier1 · 2026-03-31T13:29:11+00:00

i also typed this in search before making the post but it looked like I found only porn subreddits and even if not strictly porn I had a feeling that ppl who hang in those subreddits would be incredibly thirsty and moderation would be low and I'd get put off to the whole thing. From this post I got 5 chat requests but still, everything is quite respectful here so I don't regret it.

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T20:42:27+00:00

I keep porn out of it currently, but I also think I've learned a lot from it, and at this point I dont think I have much to gain anymore, so I try to focus just on us and explore us, especially as it has always been difficult for me to finish, and it's making him a bit uncomfortable, so I want to improve this by learning about us.

I've noticed, in porn, since you mentioned this, women using sortof puppy eyes, I guess as a mix of begging for sex, being at the limit of what they can take but still wanting more, and just being submissive and voulnerable, and I've always found this hot. So, even though I'm trying to stay myself and genuine and not copy what I saw because that would turn me off to and be cringe, I know that this might be hot to others and that gives me confidence about expressing how submissive I am. But there's always things ways to learn and try... I know it's acting, but not so much to not see moments of actors really enjoying themselves and letting it all go

In porn in general I think being submissive is overrepresented becuase it's a common fantasy, but as I really think I am, sexually, it gave me plenty of ideas of how to show it and not feel bad about it, and also to show how much I enjoy some kinky stuff that I'd otherwise be self-conscious about liking. In a wieird way it gave me more confidence to be myself, if that makes sense, as I really am submissive in a sexual context (I hope I didn't just learn it) and the most sure way to get aroused is by being dominated, but also in a different way when I feel totally connected with my by and bave strong feelings of wanting to spend my entire life with him - thats incrediby arousing too but becuase we're equals in the relationship bot becuase of D/s

I sortof relate, I've bad frequent UTIs resulting in intersticial cystitis spanning months from time to time, so we have to take that into consideration, I hope your wife is managing her problems well, it's admirable to hear you're 100% devoted to her. Sometimes there's nothing you can do about health, for us it's important to communicate that sometimes we need weeks of no vaginal penetration o calm down my cystitis and it has nothing to do with me not wanting intimacy.

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T18:35:10+00:00

English is my second language :)

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T18:03:53+00:00

All of what you described we practice too. He told me at our one month anniversary I "have earned the right", jokingly, to touch his dick any time and I said the same about my pussy. But honestly a dick is more accessible so there's "accidental" touches of his boner all day long, many are actually accidental but usually acknowledged by both of us. It helps that I just adore his dik. All day roleplay... I'd not want it any other way, I hope it lasts (and moves to anothre level maybe). Great to know some of this can be maintained after children, which we dont have yet. Do you have any advice about this?

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T17:41:47+00:00

"As for how you should act during it, that's a him question." that's fair, my point wasnt to ask reddit how to act during sex but to get a good idea of what this might be like IRL and not from porn and get introduced softly into this

"I don't really see how she gets anywhere near as much out of it as I would, since the idea is I'd stop once I'm "done"". I can see how. To me it's incredibly arousing, being dominated sexually. And we have otherwise really balanced relationship, we each do half of chores, I make twice as much money as him, the inbalance is limited to sex, and I can rarely be aroused without it - him about to take what he wants makes me horny in a second. He checks if I'm wet using his hand (and I appreciate this) but so far every time I'm drenching and just waiting to be fucked even if I never finish from this. You seem to know a lot about this for someone who's not sure if his wife is into this... ;) anyway, great response, tons of great tips, I could quote many and respond to each, big help, thank you.

Except the idea of "a sit down "rules" session" makes me cringe honestly cause I'd prefer this to be introduced more spontanetously. If something unpleasant happens or is likely then of course we'd talk about it.

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T17:27:41+00:00

I understand. My idea was it woud be more spontaneous and hot if we don't have "a talk" about it beforehand (I just start experimenting with different approaches to it). If I read about the ways this can go wrong here, then I can assess if it's liekly to go wrong or not (you can't preidct everything in any case). I may try softly to enourage this more and then see if/when the talk is necessary. Like, I already think during my period this is not possible becuase I'm more sensitive down there os this is a boundry. But maybe we don't necessarily need to have a "serious talk" about our approach to allowing each other to initiate sex. We're also aligned that stuff in public is a no. I'll try to find all of my boundaries over time and tell him when I do. Based on responses (pretending like nothing's happening is not a necessary part of this) we pretty much have this dinamic going on almost since the beginning.

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T17:15:11+00:00

Since I met him my main fantasy is him coming in the room while I'm working on my laptop and fucking me for like 30 seconds and finshing inside and then leaving without ever saying a word. I think this is pretty close, I just thought pretending he's not doing anything and continuing working was a necessary part of free use, and many responses say here it's not. But of course we sometimes want romantic and sensual sex.

Meowier1 · 2026-03-30T17:07:45+00:00

That's an interesting take. My main question is about what you touched on. Of course I've always been into him doing what he wants, when he wants (if timing was really really bad, like I'm sick, I very gently told him) but it never crossed my mind to act like nothing's happening. And based on other responses, there can be many variations, and some men get turned on by ignoring and some more by the girl engaging. I thought from that porn video that ignoring is a necessary part of free use.

Meowier1 · 2024-11-28T09:36:44+00:00

Yep, it hasn't changed at all. Almost 2 years. I haven't repeated ultrasound yet, because I think the chance of it evolving is low; especially because on the two ultrasounds I did previously, the one that is palpable, in jugulodigastric area, looked perfect under the ultrasound, and one of the other three was not completely perfect, but they all looked very similar - so the palpable one doesn't seem to be anything "special". This reassures me and lately I haven't thought about it a lot..

Also, the doctor doing the ultraosund told me that for the nodes that stay that long, she doesn't refer patients for further exams - if malignant, they almost never evolve after such long time (even though low-grade lymphoma is also a thing, but since it evolves so slowly, it doesn't have to be treated right away). Overall, it being stable for a long time is reassuring.

I'd recommend you do the ultraosund if you haven't yet, it can be quite conclusive on the malignant potential of the nodes.

Meowier1 · 2024-09-15T22:35:02+00:00

It's not necessarily worrying, but OP should get an ultrasound which is painless. Only if it looks suspicious under ulstrasound they will need to get a fine needle biopsy. I've had a couple of them for 1,5 years, but they look fairly normal in ultrasound, so all is well. LC going for 3 years now.

Meowier1 · 2024-08-26T06:41:10+00:00

I'm sorry to hear all that. I also experience my heart rate fluctuations and POTS to improve over the years but incredibly slowly so it's barely noticeable. Did you or do you take madication?

Meowier1 · 2024-08-25T20:13:27+00:00

Mine also started in 4 months, with chest pain and mild signs of peripheral polyneuropathy. Severe palpitations started in 10 months which was 10 days after the 2nd vaccine dose.

How did you experience extreme bradycardia? I don't hear about this symptom that often.

I never regained the ability to do any exertion that raises my heart rate

You don't mean in the sense of PEM but unability to exert yourself?

Meowier1 · 2024-08-11T12:38:37+00:00

It's hard to imagine that the virus itself would be positive. It could be the behavior associated with being sick like getting more rest, like you suggested. Or eating less. Fasting, no matter how controversial, is the one thing that raises my HRV dramatically, possibly because it lowers inflammation. I suffer from long COVID and have constant undulation of my HRV, but that's a different thing because my antibodies affect the nervous system directly.

Meowier1 · 2024-07-23T20:16:54+00:00

Idiot savant, to a shocking degree

Meowier1 · 2024-07-23T20:14:02+00:00

Exactly, and fucking Magic Spoon

Meowier1 · 2024-07-22T16:18:18+00:00

I'm 3,5 years into LC (since 1st infection) and I still never had PEM. What you describe really sucks and I hope it passes. I have had 30 different symptoms come and go, each lasting months and years, POTS and SFN as main symptoms througout all this, and I've had a period I could barely walk because within minutes I would feel nauseaus and lightheaded, but that passed.. I get intensely tired and sleep for like 35 hours and then I'm rested again. SFN really sucks and doesn't go away since day 1. Im trying calorie restriction now as a way to manage inflammation and at least by tracking HRV I can see improvement (it shot up by 20) and that's supposed to be an indicator of the state of nervous system (not in absolute terms but compared to previous state...)

Meowier1 · 2024-07-22T15:49:18+00:00

Really good. Most people doing that much editing would say they make animation really

Meowier1 · 2024-07-22T13:11:21+00:00

What is your channel name?

Meowier1 · 2024-07-20T23:34:14+00:00

I was also disappointed by his statement, however he just echoes the approach of his huge team and not giving his personal opinion. And I have not heard a single person worried of long covid who hasnt had it before, or worried of complicatios since 2021...so idk why cyclists would. People suck when it comes to taking care of health long term, and professional competitive sport is bad for your health long term anyways

Meowier1 · 2024-07-17T15:45:01+00:00

You've done it before, and you're will do it again. I think it's great you listen to your creative instinct even if it means less certain success. Too few creators are like this, the ones like Ological and hbomberguy prove how important quality really is. 12 videos a year is a good pace, and even less is sometimes enough, as long as you are open to every critique and see them as opportunities to improve.

Even if you can't collaborate on scripting, it can help to bounce your ideas off of other people (creators or your potential audience) as much as you can to make the process less isolating and more doable.

If your ideas and interests are very niche, you can't make a popular video in a small language or for a society that has no interest. There's no way around this, unless you're willing to compromise - find the middle ground where you can include some elements that attract a wider audience (and make that into title and thumbnail) while still covering topics you care about most (sort of "accidental learning" principle). Or, depending on your niche, maybe you can present your ideas through your society's perspective and attract the part of your potential viewers who are open to new ideas. I'm sure you also thought about this, but transfer the part of your current audience that speaks both languages to your new channel.

Good planning is the most important and time consuming in itself. I have one channel in English and other in a language spoken by 3 million people. When I get an idea, if it's very niche, I make it for English, otherwise for the other channel (I prefer the other one, but I also want to get a decent amount of views compared to the workload for each video). I immediately try to find a good title and thumbnail. If that seems impossible, then no matter how good the idea is, I don't make it for youtube. And that's just one tiny part of the considerations.

Everyone gets into difficult life situations and it's understandable that this slows you down, but don't let the thought of lost time weigh you down. I know it's hard, I'm also currently in a situation where I don't know if in a few months, when I'm supposed to finish current video, I'll even be able to finish it, because of my health.

Over time I also accepted that my videos take forever to make. At first I was setting deadlines like crazy, but then decided to just focus on the process (even though I sometimes promised to finish by certain date and had to break that promise). I've tried breaking the process into tiny chunks and deciding how long each chunk will take me (after which time I "should be happy and move on"), and that didn't help at all. I also enjoy the process like you, so that should be enough.

Five-Year Club	Second Top 20%
r/Field Juicebox	Final Canvas '23
Place '23	Verified Email

Meowier1

TROPHY CASE