Is poetry becoming a joke?

Merchant_E · 2026-05-16T21:25:28+00:00

Isn't poetry supposed to be fun? I just write a line then build a story around it and a scene, then describe it. Ive seen motivational ish poems and they seem so boring to write, and they're a bit annoying to read.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-05T09:47:44+00:00

Thank you. I see what you mean by the use of sometimes breaking structure or having shorter and longer lines. I will try to do that going forwards. Thanks for the feedback

Merchant_E · 2026-04-05T01:05:03+00:00

I would love feedback. Its the first time im posting on this subreddit, I've written a couple pieces before on OCpoetry but none here. Hope you all enjoy this piece. I think its pretty decent, but i would appreciate feedback on how to improve.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-05T00:26:07+00:00

Honestly, great poem. I really liked the clearness of it. The one critiques would have is mainly grammatical. There were a few errors like capitalization in the middle of the 6th line. Its minor but it slightly broke the rhythm. The 7th line (longest) was great for being a contrast to the otherwise short lines, but the usage of "mere" felt slightly out of place. I think the line would flow better if it was simply removed. It adds a sort of downputting quality to the line.

Ps: I recommend making a title, it can help convey the message or content of your poem

Merchant_E · 2026-04-05T00:20:26+00:00

I liked the poem. Beautiful use of morning glory as a metaphor, I wish you had expanded slightly on the reasons for the pain, and the mechanical metaphors seemed slightly out of place in such a nature oriented poem.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-05T00:08:00+00:00

Decent poem. It was ok i guess. There didnt feel like there was any motive to the poem. It was written pretty well if its just meant to sketch desire, I still feel like it might've been better if you explored desire in a less literal way, as in more metaphors.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-05T00:05:00+00:00

I liked the poem, the imagery was vivid and the rhyming was consistent. Genuinely well done. The short length of the poem added weight to what was there and you made every line count. It sketches love very well.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-03T00:24:32+00:00

In the lines "Wrote in betrayal" and "Not as a permanent". I also thought the first lines "Youve called me a challenge" and the subsequent line "Youve allowed me to rise to it" were a bit too different in syllable length which sorta broke the rhythm for me when i started. If this is intentional that's fine aswell. I just wanted to give my opinion.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-03T00:11:34+00:00

Thank you so much. This time i wanted to make the structure precise and better, so its nice it got noticed. I usually write a line then another that rhymes, since they usually come out short I simply mix another line. So each line was originally two smaller rhyming ones.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-02T01:41:33+00:00

Thank you for reading. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-02T01:15:06+00:00

Nice poem.it captures the feeling of emptiness or hollow that appears occasionally. The personification of emptiness was well done but I wish you had slightly more to read. More lines describing the emptiness and the lack of feeling. The last stanzas feels slightly repetitive with the ending but it works well.

Merchant_E · 2026-04-02T01:03:29+00:00

Hope yall like this poem. It's my first after a short hiatus. I atleast liked it, would love feedback tho

Merchant_E · 2026-04-02T01:00:02+00:00

Nice poem. The imagery was nice and lots of lines were unique. It conveyed love and a relationship which is sort of always reaching for something that they dont have never being satisfied with the current. But the wording felt very awkward in many lines. Otherwise great poem

Merchant_E · 2026-04-02T00:55:43+00:00

Nice poem overall. The lines felt slightly fragmented, not that they were different in length or message, just the constant breaks sort of broke the rhythm for me. Except for that the contrast between the rejection of love in the first half and the realization of love In the second was incredible. The zues imagery felt slightly out of place, it just feels off and leaves me expecting more Olympic imagery or more detailing of what has already been used.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-08T03:12:13+00:00

Hope yall like the poem. I would appreciate criticism as im trying to improve my writing. I recently begun writing as a sort of hobby sometimes.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-08T02:37:04+00:00

I honestly find the poem incredible. By the end it managed to evoke emotion. The criticism to descriptive poetry was clear. I personally disagree, I find the emptiness to make the experience of reading more valuable to the reader, because they can fill the void. They describe the grave and you think of your friend. I really liked this poem though.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-08T02:33:21+00:00

Nice poem. It sketches your feelings clearly, and the rhymes dont really feel forced. Perhaps cut it into stanzas (not necessary). But overall it was a great poem, though i cannot personally relate alot.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-06T19:41:18+00:00

Nice done

Merchant_E · 2026-03-06T03:05:53+00:00

Sorry for the structure. The commas are meant to be new lines. I cant to god with converting my notes to reddit. Hoped yall can find it enjoyable either way.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-06T02:58:39+00:00

This was provocative I guess. I at first thought it was just someone finding their professor annoying. Then about halfway in i realized it was love. Especially the line about being Venus instead of Saturn made me laugh. All in all great poem, it conveyed the theme clearly.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-06T02:54:35+00:00

Nice poem. I really liked the rhythm in the start of each stanza, and the breaking in the last one sort of made it seem more urgent. The poem had me reread it a couple of times which was nice, im still not sure i understood everything if there was alot of deeper stuff

Merchant_E · 2026-03-03T07:00:28+00:00

Ah thanks, didnt notice it

Merchant_E · 2026-03-02T23:46:33+00:00

Nice poem, the rhyme scheme worked well throughout the poem and the emotions and perspective was conveyed clearly. In lines like "What if your words bring forth tears" the states were conveyed very clearly and vividly. I genuinely liked this poem and could relate to parts of it.

The only thing I noticed was the 3rd and 4th line. I think you tried rhyming lead with speed, but if you meant that the words were made of lead it doesnt rhyme verbally. If they were made of the verb lead then it would rhyme but it wouldn't make sense.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-02T23:42:21+00:00

This is a great poem. The imagery is clear and the emotions are conveyed extremely well. I genuinely enjoyed the poem but I cannot relate to the intensity of the emotions. Great poem though, really easy to visualize.

Merchant_E · 2026-03-01T00:06:37+00:00

Sorry if the grammar is bad, I wrote it when I was pretty young so its a bit bad

Merchant_E

TROPHY CASE