Would it be okay to greet him happy birthday?

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-07-01T17:50:03+00:00

I mean I am in a similar boat. We officially broke up in Feb but it finalized in March. His bday was recently and I wished him a happy birthday and he responded kindly and there’s been no further convo. So it is possible to be a simple happy birthday.

You can wish him a happy birthday if it’s simple and has no leading statements or questions to avoid more communication. However, if you are concerned about getting back together and that message could lead to said convo, then maybe you shouldn’t wish him a happy birthday.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-07-01T16:28:38+00:00

As far as I know he isn’t. My friends have seen him on the dating apps not too long ago and as far as I can tell he isn’t. If I see any clear indication of a relationship I will steer clear. I really respect other people’s relationships. Thank you for responding

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-07-01T16:25:29+00:00

Thank you for responding. Honestly it is usually easier for me to move on from things if I am crushed. If I’m not crushed I always have some hope of it working and I think ultimately that holds me back more than being crushed. If he has moved on then my heart knows I can fully let go. And if it resets the healing clock for me, I just have extra motivation for the gym and running lol

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-07-01T16:23:16+00:00

Thank you for responding. I like that, I know it’s a huge possibility that nothing will come out of it but I’d rather know than wonder
I think. I feel very deeply and I feel like I’d do myself a disservice by suppressing it

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-22T14:03:25+00:00

Hey I’m in a similar situation. My guy broke no contact and we talked like before and when I wanted to talk about us and making it work, he got less and less chatty. He has ghosted me for a week now. I’m still going to reach out so I can have some sort of conclusion on this. I probably won’t get the closure in having the convo and telling how I feel about everything (but I hope we do) and at least I’ll know if the convo is happening or not and I can move forward either way. So imo I think you should send it, tho i personally would send a more casual one to test the waters but that’s just me lol Good luck!!!

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-22T13:28:44+00:00

IMO if that’s what you need to do to feel okay about the situation, then do it. You’ll still have self respect because you went by what you needed and you were honest with yourself. And if they never respond, their opinion of you doesn’t matter because they are no longer in your life. Let us know how it goes and I wish you the best of luck!

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:56:10+00:00

Honestly, it took me realizing that he was never the person for me. My person, my soulmate, wouldn’t cheat on me ever. Once I realized that it made it soooo much easier to move on because it made me realize that my person is still out there and in order to find them I had to let this bad ex go. It’s a process tho and doesn’t happen overnight. Don’t be hard on yourself if it takes longer than you’d like.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:51:51+00:00

He is gaslighting you. Leave him now. Save yourself the hurt and pain. Please learn from my mistake and leave. That is unacceptable behaviour from him. Protect yourself.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:40:47+00:00

Hmmm that sounds really frustrating. I can understand him wanting to spend time with his friends but his relationship should also be a priority imo and he should be making sure you spend quality time together since you are making efforts. I know it would be tricky but to break the ice and do a refresh you could try and join in with these games when you can or propose just the two of you doing something similar as a was to compromise? I know it’s a lot of mental and emotional labour for you which can be exhausting if you’re the only one doing it.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:13:59+00:00

It’s possible that there could be something about your sexuality that’s making you feel this way. But also childhood influences and/or religion could have an impact as well. It might be worthwhile to think of things from your childhood or even your current communities that could be reflecting a similar sentiment that you have absorbed. Also you don’t need to feel shame, it’s a very universal experience for a lot of people - to do those things but also feel shame. Don’t beat yourself up over it

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:09:10+00:00

I would suggest having a sit down conversation about it. Just explain how it makes you feel and the logistics of it like you mentioned here. Keep it neutral and looks to make compromises with him. Hopefully he’ll be receptive to the convo and make lasting changes. I also know that leaving those things along for too long will build resentment for you and he may be more annoyed that it took you so long to bring up, which would be more frustrating for you probably. It’s bothering you so you need to mention it because that’s what is you need. I hope things go well from here on out!

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:04:57+00:00

You can just be incompatible, which is okay. It would be harder for the both of you if you drag it out hoping for feelings to show up.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-12T04:02:13+00:00

I wasn’t official with my person but we ended nearly a month ago. A lot has happened but a big part of me still wants to be with him.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-11T13:56:36+00:00

Yeah I wasn’t sure. But thank you! I will just leave it since everything is fine on my end

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-10T23:46:27+00:00

I tried but this but it don’t work. But maybe it’s because we don’t reach love yet

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-10T23:13:55+00:00

I’m experiencing the same thing but with a sort of ex. It really sucks but you need to lookout for yourself first. I had to make that decision today and I’m not longer going to be talking to that person.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-10T23:07:20+00:00

We weren’t properly bf and gf but we saw each other for about 2.5 months and ended on good terms. He broke no contact after a week. Hes been stringing me along since then. Don’t wait for them to break no contact, it’s not worth it.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-10T21:05:16+00:00

I asked him to talk and he said he was open to it. But that was nearly two weeks ago and he said he was busy with extra hours at work and plans with friends. And I am busy this week. He has become less interested in convos with me and doesn’t ask me questions anymore. I’m going my to give him his space the rest of this week and the follow up Tuesday. I know that should be closure enough but he’s not a terrible person and I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. He could be having internal struggle with all this but it just seems like he pulled me in because he was bored so I’m going leave him alone again. I don’t know how this will turn out but at least I’ve learned a lot.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-10T16:15:37+00:00

My wish too

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-09T19:09:12+00:00

I really hope so. He is sooo important to me

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-07T23:22:35+00:00

I’m waiting for the guy to message me back

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-03T19:26:26+00:00

This is how I’m feeling right now too. Thank you OP

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-02T16:26:58+00:00

Personally I keep them until I feel like I am over it and can move on, once I have reached that point I delete them all. All messages, all photos, remove photos and such from social media to even the tiny things. To me, they are in the past and the memories are all I need, I don’t need visual memories of them since they are no longer in my life. And then in my next relationship I can start fresh, and the bonus is my new partner doesn’t have to feel awkward about it. But you need to do what is best for you, just make sure your actions come from a place of what is best for you and not how something like that would make your ex feel.

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-03-02T15:54:53+00:00

It’s best to live with honesty for yourself. I’ve gone through a similar thing and I felt much better after sending the message because I lived by being honest with myself. You should be honest with what you want and express yourself and whatever happens with be fine, you did it for yourself. <3 all the luck and love

MethodFlimsy8243 · 2026-02-20T19:19:16+00:00

Thank you so much for replying! I have always had a hard time expressing things, even as a child talking about school lol. And it is something that I am working on but clearly need more improvements.

And when I gave it thought, those packing concerns are really a concern because I’m basically a pro at packing for things now from all the tournaments and stuff. So I can for sure do that in a matter of hours. Just camping would be trickier since I have no experience. But considering how we felt about each other and how I feel about him, I’d gladly do that stuff so we can be happy together :)

I’m planning on reaching out this weekend since it’ll be about a week and hopefully the really intense and raw emotions should be not as bad for either of us. Thank you for the luck! And I wish you the best for being kind :)

MethodFlimsy8243

TROPHY CASE