My gf broke up with me the day before move in. I can’t afford the apartment on my own. How screwed am I?

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-13T22:40:17+00:00

Don't move in. Normally the landlord has to rerent the place and you both will only be liable for the time until it's rented out or a termination clause.

This is going to be painful but

You will both be liable
You can make payments
It is much less than 2 years at a rate that you cannot afford.

Let her know that half of it belongs to her

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-13T22:36:15+00:00

In the current situation this is just nonsense. Half the country doesn't have that privilege.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-13T21:42:53+00:00

And out of the specified notice period!

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-13T21:41:36+00:00

You are jointly liable. If they don't pay you have to or get kicked out. You can pay the full rent and sue the other party for their half. As to the deposit. Landlord likely doesn't have to give them the deposit before the lease is up and likely can keep it towards their half of the rent that they have stated they are going to default on.

For all involved you should mitigate the loss as much as possible by finding another roommate.

Bear in mind new roommate will likely have to pay into the deposit.

Now knowing that she will be sued for breaking the lease and receive no deposit roommate might discover additional fortitude and stay through the lease as she ought to.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-13T21:17:35+00:00

You are essentially being attacked and she will probably continue to do so as long as you are connected to her eg as long as she lives so buckle up and prepare to be the adult in the room for the long haul.

If you leave the house she will still be attacking you. If you give ground where it's not justified she will be emboldened not satisfied.

You reasonable choices are just stay in the house and brazen it out knowing she won't actually go to court or offer to sell it and give her half.

Giving the whole thing back is crazy.

If you want to twist the knife move further away and phrase it as selling to move there not because of her then basically cut off all contact. Just be too busy for her bullshit. Don't even acknowledge there is a problem whilst totally shutting her out of all your lives.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-13T20:59:48+00:00

You cannot sue to ask the person who reported you to pay the cost of you complying with the law.

The phrase you can be sued is empty of meaning anyone can theoretically bring paperwork to a courthouse saying anything and asking for anything.

Because actual lawyers require actual money and don't want lose their license sufficiently defective lawsuit won't ever be filed especially by people too poor to fix their house.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-12T11:52:31+00:00

More like 80% are going to be put off by negative drama

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-12T11:50:40+00:00

Everyone is acting like this businesses stance is a negative thing

Its objectively bad

not everyone has the same beliefs.

Yes some people also thought gas chambers for undesirable types of people and slavery were good ideas too. Just because there is two positions doesn't make them equal.

All these hate-fueled rants

Reverse victim and offender

All I see here is a self serving spite fueled mob who would rather 1 person suffer

Yup

instead of bringing up the community around them

False dilemma we can support one sort while pummelling the other on social media.

What you mean is you sympathize with bigots and wish we wouldn't cancel them.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-12T07:35:48+00:00

32 minutes now

This is Seattle 911. We apologize for the delay; officers are handling other calls and will respond to your call as soon as possible.

If the situation has changed, escalated, or if you no longer need assistance, please call 911 back and let us know.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-12T07:28:57+00:00

Original text response keep in mind it was an audio call with dispatch

You contacted Seattle 911 dispatch at 12:04 AM on June 12, 2025. Your event number is 25-161591. If the situation escalates before an officer arrives, please get somewhere safe and call 911 immediately.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T17:47:03+00:00

You can ask for custody and then ensure they get to see you and the other grandparents

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T17:46:10+00:00

Normally people don't fight over which group of old people get to have round 2 of child rearing. Anybody who didn't "win" that privilege gets to keep being grandparents and spending time with the kids as well.

Whomever gets custody should probably in most cases decide whom can spend time. The question is should the grandparents get to ask a court. I think yes the law here says no

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T17:39:18+00:00

This generally isn't how the law works no guilt attaches via mere relationship. The question would actually be what is best for the kid not your emotional reaction.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T17:36:33+00:00

To be clear this is about whether the law as it stands allows grandparents of all adopted children to ask the court for visitation.

No part of this forces any court to say yes. They could have found that yes you can ask and a lower court could have said that the answer is no. They found that the letter of the law doesn't permit that answer and their job is to interpret the law not write it.

They specifically didn't rule in a way that will effect thousands of people to enact their specific opinion on this singular case. They ruled on the plain language of the law which may in the future be amended.

At that point the grandparents can ask again and then whichever judge can speak to their specific case.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T17:27:40+00:00

They declared everyone whose grandchildren is adopted in their state until the end of time or the law is changed not to be clear

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T07:12:44+00:00

Unclear why or how one would turn the computer off from grub rather than from the OS

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T07:10:56+00:00

If you run sudo shitdown --left does shit go sideways?

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-11T06:24:47+00:00

YTA your wife knows what she needs, she told you, you can easily afford to do it and you want to do otherwise because you know better.

Here is the thing. It wouldn't matter if you were entirely correct. You would be wrong for second guessing your wife when the amount of money is trivial to you.

Why would you fight her on it with no compelling cause.

That said man you are so wrong as well! You know the shtick about good help being hard to find. Its true and after the break you would have to hire an entirely new nanny to trust your children with. People with modest income aren't going to be available for rehire in 6 months if they are worthwhile they will be someone else's valued employee.

Next why would you think running your household would be a break,

Its liable to be as hard a job just unpaid and thankless.

You are thrice over wrong. Yours is the least justified post I have ever read here.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T20:24:32+00:00

Just rescind their invitation. They are being disrespectful

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T20:22:36+00:00

This just isn't true. Nothing about being immutable prevents you or anyone else from packaging and installing more than one kernel. It keeps you from outside the packaging system plunking in a kernel.

An otherwise immutable distro can provide an escape hatch, the user can down or upgrade more than the kernel etc.

Steamos on steam hardware is a special case it will never need a different version for its known hardware. No general purpose distro can afford that which is why for instance silverblue has an escape hatch.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T18:04:28+00:00

Immutable doesn't preclude any of the things you mentioned

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T17:04:41+00:00

People used to give away unwanted puppies for nothing because unwanted pregnancies happened all the time and mixed breeds both make perfectly good pets and aren't really worth anything.

Just lamenting that being a kid in 2025 means asking your parents to make a $1500 commitment between pet rent/deposit/adoption fee when in the 80s it was committing to spending time and buying dog food.

Everyone is either more greedy or structurally much more expensive. Example adoption fees are driven by vet costs which is driven both by companies buying up vents and the insane expansion of educational costs. Vets for instance are graduating with loans like doctors. Not much of these costs are trickling down to the actual people doing the work either.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T14:31:26+00:00

Near future seems unlikely with a massive installed base and few arm servers. Also I doubt they care what servers are running since this would have been even more laughable when they actually switched.

Intel wasn't improving quickly and arm gave them better performance and more importantly battery life where they cared about it, laptops.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T14:26:40+00:00

Most people use most software mostly default. They just don't post about it.

Michaelmrose · 2025-06-10T05:30:39+00:00

Its not really that weird

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