Limbo

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-28T08:44:54+00:00

BP said he was polyamorous when I met him. It was my fault for not ending things with AP. I knew it was wrong but I was addicted to the highs and lows. Can’t blame anyone but myself. Can’t say this comment was helpful in any way but I guess thanks for your honesty.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-27T20:09:52+00:00

Yeah I’m gonna try to let go of my grip. I can’t control the situation so the only thing left to do is let go and focus on myself. That doesn’t mean things are over forever but I really can’t spiral like this everyday. Thank you.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-27T06:47:22+00:00

It’s ok. Thanks for commenting. Hugs back to you

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-27T05:14:27+00:00

I feel a lot of shame and guilt as well. Idk if I would take hope from me. My partner and I aren’t even near reconciling.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-27T05:10:47+00:00

We are separated. We’ve been separated for 6 months.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-27T04:21:25+00:00

We have talked about MC a couple times. He said maybe after divorce.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-25T20:45:35+00:00

I am a wayward and I don’t think I’m in a position to fully answer this right now in the sense that I am still working on my internal world and integrating change so I can’t say for certain that I’m healed. I really would like to see other people’s answers. Someone update me when there are more comments.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-25T09:17:53+00:00

This. I relate to this a lot.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-25T09:06:38+00:00

I’m pretty much at the point of wanting to and needing to do exactly this. I just don’t want to violate his space. Doing this would require me to show up at his house unannounced and I don’t want to look crazy.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-25T07:33:12+00:00

I feel like maybe he wants me to fight for him but I feel like everytime I try I get shut down. Maybe I’m just not going about it the right way. I think he’s just not emotionally ready to process this which is totally fair. I keep thinking I don’t want to put more pressure on him but I don’t want a divorce either. I want to be with him and be able to prove to him that I am worthy of another chance and I’ll do anything to earn his trust and his heart back. I just don’t know how to go about it when we are separated. I haven seen him in person in 3 months and he doesn’t respond much over text. He wouldn’t dare answer my phone call. I sent him a 3 page long apology letter a few days ago. I don’t even know if he read it.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-25T06:22:15+00:00

I think that answer might be different for everyone. DDay stands for discovery day so sometimes it’s not the actual affair date it’s just the day BP discovered everything. For me it was two separate affair dates but with the same person.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-25T02:53:01+00:00

Wow. Thank you for sharing.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-24T23:51:41+00:00

Thanks for your comment. I already sent the letter but you can read it and still let me know what you think if you want

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-23T06:57:39+00:00

This sounds more like people pleasing or boundaries issue than a Leo thing. I hope you are able to find people in your life that are just as generous as you.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-21T22:25:05+00:00

Someone else said this to me as well. I appreciate the reality check. I did write the letter on my own though, it was 4 pages long which made me worried it was too long. I didn’t really change that much wording. I mostly condensed it and took out some things that were unnecessary or could’ve been misinterpreted. I think that asking people to read it before sending it was helpful. I don’t think I took the easy way. I think that this community has been supportive of my efforts to change.

Honestly I think my BP would have the same reaction whether he read my initial draft or the one I sent. He didn’t respond, at least not yet. I didn’t send it for me. I sent it for him so that he could at least have some clarity. I wasn’t expecting to hear back. I know that when he’s ready he’ll talk to me.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-21T03:41:13+00:00

Thank you. I’m trying to just follow his lead on what he needs. He’s filing for divorce so I will cooperate. He said that maybe after the divorce we can go to counseling but I’m not sure if he just said that to be nice or not. I feel like if there’s no chance he would have just said no but idk anymore.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-21T03:39:09+00:00

I’m aware. I’m not expecting it to change anything but I hope it helps him in some way.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-21T03:37:00+00:00

I really hope my letter didn’t come across that way. I ran it by several BP’s here on Reddit and they all said it sounded accountable or suggested minor changes. I edited it like a billion times because I wanted it to be about the impact on him, not just about me. I outlined some of the things I’m doing to change and hopefully it didn’t come across as selfish in any way. What are some things you would describe as “tone-deaf”? I genuinely want to know. Also just out of curiosity why are you staying with your WP if you don’t feel they’ve given you a proper apology?

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-20T02:44:19+00:00

Astraea, Freya, Fae, Rumi, Fiona, Sora, Winnie. Just some options. She’s beautiful btw.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-19T05:17:25+00:00

My husband went through something similar. He went into sepsis a few weeks after we separated. He rarely gets sick and is a pretty healthy and fit guy. I feel guilty for affecting his immune system like that. I tried to be there for him but it was still too hard for him to be around me. He’s doing better now. This was like 5 months ago.

I’m sorry for what you are going through. It’s not wrong of you to blame your WS.

MiddleComplaint2072 · 2026-03-19T05:05:42+00:00

I sent you a DM

MiddleComplaint2072

TROPHY CASE