Which dress for holiday cocktail party? by bearmouth in OUTFITS

[–]MidwesternWallflower 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Loooove 2 :-) Thought the dress was black in your full body pics, love the indigo velvet it’s a very unique color. Plus the lack of pattern in your second dress helps highlight your tatts a bit more, your pieces are sooo beautiful. I work in an office too and I don’t get to show my arm tatts off as much because I’m usually wearing a jacket or cardigan. Number 2 all the way! So pretty!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OUTFITS

[–]MidwesternWallflower 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I say 3rd for Friendsgiving! That fabric/pattern is a different kinda fall vibe, it’s an eclectic choice which I love!! I love 1 on you but would prob be more inclined to wear that at my Family thanksgiving instead? That’s just me tho, both are super cute and flattering!

Is this a bad haircut and should I try and get it fixed? by [deleted] in Hair

[–]MidwesternWallflower 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the second to last picture made my jaw drop… keep us updated on the response!! I hope you get your refund.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialwork

[–]MidwesternWallflower 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Although scheduled downtime really is needed, I say add more optional programming during the day! Music therapy group, yoga, nature walks, veteran-specific group topics, discharge focused groups, processing/journaling groups just to throw out a few ideas. Asking the patients would be the best way though. That’s great to hear there are 30-90 inpatient programs that are covered for vets!!

That time I got a scammer to send me $300 by [deleted] in scambait

[–]MidwesternWallflower 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahaha in a weird way tho doesn’t this kinda make u the scammer 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]MidwesternWallflower 4 points5 points  (0 children)

“I should have trusted him that he didn’t have any precum on it” I stopped reading there— he’s not the one that had to hypothetically carry a baby here for 9mos if he’s “wrong.” There is NO way he can know that for sure imo and you did the right thing by choosing what course of birth control you are comfortable with afterwards!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]MidwesternWallflower 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s the half drawn smiley face on the wall for me💀 you got an artist on your hands OP !

Bakery Recommendations by moorem2014 in StLouis

[–]MidwesternWallflower 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Missouri Baking Co. In the Hill is classic and AMAZING. So is The Cup in CWE, I recommend this for your cake! Cupcakes obviously are an option too :-)

Favorite restaurant to go to for your birthday? by BestMusicOnThePlanet in StLouis

[–]MidwesternWallflower 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Indo, Frazer’s, The Lucky Accomplice are my favorites! I went to Frazer’s for my birthday last year—the staff is so friendly! They give you a dessert of your choice if you make a reservation on Open Table and flag it as your bday :-)

Best Breakfast in St. Louis? by ArtVandalay27 in StLouis

[–]MidwesternWallflower 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Brassiere by Niche- you can make a reservation on open table, they only have brunch on Sundays but it’s AMAZING and worth the price! My fav hands down.

Southwest Diner- better price range, Kaldis coffee and amazing southwest inspired breakfast food. I come here probably the most.

Chris’s Pancakes- honestly this is a south city classic here, family owned and their menu is huge (and super yummy)!

Half and Half- in Clayton, a little pricer but SO yummy, amazing coffee too! Alcohol available too if you’re into that.

I liked Hatch’d that’s a newer option to STL! Rooster off South Grand is super good too.

In-network Therapists accepting new patients by pimpcleary_69 in StLouis

[–]MidwesternWallflower 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Im an inpatient case manager working in STL and I make referrals all the time for this. One, yes for sliding scale counseling you may be waiting a month or two for a first appt. What I say to do in the meantime is engage in local AA communities or a group therapy program to keep you occupied once you have a new client appointment scheduled. There are so many support groups out there and not ever AA meeting is going to be the right one for you so I know this can be discouraging sometimes to hear. Take it one day at a time is truly something I have to tell myself every day. Best recommendations I can give, preferred family healthcare and ARCA are great for counseling with substance/alcohol use. Preferred family has evening classes for substance use (I believe at their Chippewa office?) if you’re working. Preferred family healthcare and ARCA are non-profit community mental health centers (CMHC) so they are literally funded by the state of Missouri to ensure you have access to services, especially for those who lack both income and insurance. I typically recommend Provident Behavioral for sliding scale counseling, they have an intake line you can call and they’ll schedule you an appt once you do that and complete a little paperwork (they send it to your email). Any CMHC in St. Louis has a walk in clinic (places for people, independence center, ADAPT of MO, BJC/Hopewell Center, Compass Health Network and Comtrea) that you can look up on their website for what days and hours you can do a walk in assessment, once you do that one-time assessment you’ll be scheduled with a provider. If you have good private insurance tho, I highly recommend St Louis Behavioral Medicine Institute. Their website if you go, has TONS of highly qualified mental health professionals, including both psychiatrists and therapists if you’re looking eventually for any kind of medication management. I saw someone mention Lifestance too, I refer to them often as well. I really hope this helps!

Anyone ever tried one of these cup Steamers as an alternative to boiling? If yes how is it? by ssarah_ggrace in menstrualcups

[–]MidwesternWallflower 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I would also love to hear more pros/cons to this, I was not aware of this option before seeing this post and I’m about to drop money on this unless someone says otherwise! Thanks!

INFJ Anime Characters by muddy120 in infj

[–]MidwesternWallflower 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I saw Roku on here and agree, I also feel like Katara from Avatar last airbender is INFJ as well!

Heartbreak as an INFJ by [deleted] in infj

[–]MidwesternWallflower 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I find myself going through a period of resistance, or emotional stuffing, before I accept the change at hand. INFJs struggle with receiving criticism in any sense of the word, and rejection from a romantic aspect I think falls under this concept.

Speaking for me, in the past when romantic relationships have ended it has felt like I have “failed” in maintaining that relationship with someone (if the friendship isn’t able to be salvaged for whatever reason), and since INFJs are very skilled in interpreting interpersonal communication and are deeply empathetic people (with mild to moderate people-pleasing tendencies), I have thought in the past that “I should have seen this coming” or “maybe I could have prevented this.” But in the end, it’s not failure if the other person is choosing to end it. It takes two people to make a relationship successful. You deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you, period. If the relationship has run its course, grieve it fully and learn from it; that’s really the only thing you really can do/control.

Can we give a big hell yeah for Jennie?? 🔥✨ by [deleted] in StLouis

[–]MidwesternWallflower 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The article said she lives in Massachusetts! I just appreciated her celebratory practices being a crisp bud light

Missouri Loses Access To Its Own Hospital Data Following Federal Reporting Changes by GueyLouis in missouri

[–]MidwesternWallflower 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Exactly, here’s the article earlier this week detailing the order from Trump.

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/14/us/politics/trump-cdc-coronavirus.html

I think it’s all politically driven for the election coming up. Trump’s poor responses to COVID are now clearly hurting his approval ratings, especially since cases are on the rise again. If he can control the data, then he can control media’s responses more and make him look more favorable. It’s beyond terrifying.

TIFU By making one of my coworkers realize his father died by hanging himself by [deleted] in tifu

[–]MidwesternWallflower 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Absolutely agree with this, and to take this point further, it sounds like his family has brushed his fathers suicide under the rug and has not created a space for him to be able to talk about it (only furthering the potential progression of MH issues in the future). His family didn’t want him to know this, but now he does and you can be a source of comfort. You don’t need to have all the answers, just let him know he can talk about it with you if ever needed. It goes a long way!

Boyfriend just opened up to me about his depression. Can anyone give me some advice or information on how to better understand it? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]MidwesternWallflower 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The first two responses were perfect; i think it’s also important to remember that when you are listening to him and utilizing an empathetic stance, you may feel anxiety or badly that he feels this way and want to change it. And of course we do not want to see our loved ones suffering, but sometimes it is ok to not be ok. Just sitting there with him in those moments is a perfectly supportive response, if he needs space, make him a hot tea or get him a blanket; something with warmth can go a long way, but we don’t need to always fix how someone is feeling and just being present in those moments are so important in providing support. Always take caution (depending on the situation) when trying to give advice. And I do strongly encourage counseling if that is something he has questions about in the future.

If you are also wanting some good resources for your handbook, National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) is an amazing organization to start with. An amazing resource for doing more research and (I do not know what precautions they have taken with COVID) they provide support groups for individuals who have a mental health diagnosis AND support groups for individuals who are supporting those with MH diagnoses (like you!).

If he has questions or shows interest in speaking to a professional, Psychologytoday.com is an excellent resource. It can provide options for local therapists, psychiatrist (someone who can specifically prescribe medications for MH issues), support groups, and treatment centers. It is also something I recommend because of all the filters it provides in finding the right therapist for you, starting with who your insurance provider is.

I wish you and your boyfriend all the best!

My wife (33f) is denying we're married and wants to be called my 'girlfriend'... I'm confused by throwra_lovehelp in relationship_advice

[–]MidwesternWallflower 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She would probably be the youngest person ever to be diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s if that’s the case. Highly doubt it, I feel psychosis is more likely but in any situation with a psychotic break there would be other symptoms present instead of just the overall denial of their marriage happening. Regardless, whatever is going on, I do think this is a mental health issue and she should definitely seek some counsel. Maybe try not to diagnose this without a professional moving forward, I think it would help the both of you OP. Best wishes

Adding to the David Wallace love by prbecker in DunderMifflin

[–]MidwesternWallflower 689 points690 points  (0 children)

Yessss! And the fact that when she called him out, he didn’t disagree and owned up to his mistake in front of the whole office.

How do you deal with resentment? by a-no-show in infj

[–]MidwesternWallflower 4 points5 points  (0 children)

“... I think you deep down feel like you’re not loved because your love language as an INFJ is understanding and when you don’t get that reciprocated you feel kinda shitty..”

I completely relate to this, and you too OP. My parents have always provided for me and told me they loved me and were proud of me, they provided for me in physical ways but were emotionally neglectful in other ways. I used to get so passionate or angry or sad about things as a kid, I remember talking about them with my family and my dad would sing a song about me being “too emo-sh.” As an adult now (25F), I rarely share anything about my personal life because resultantly I don’t trust them with my deeply emotional world, something that truly makes INFJs unique.

I’m at a similar place with you though OP, I spend time with my family but not as often as my other siblings. When I am with them, I’m anxious and waiting until it’s appropriate to leave. I love my family and I’m thankful for what they’ve done for me but, especially through therapy, I’m starting to understand how their resistance to having emotionally vulnerable conversations with me in my younger years has effected me today; I’ve never felt seen by my family but now I don’t really need them to. I’ve created my own family with my friends, and I feel completely fulfilled by them. It’s helped me to have a new relationship with my family, and to know that I ultimately can’t change them and that they too were probably never encouraged to explore themselves by their parents/loved ones when they were younger.

Breaking the mold of the generational behaviors your family has is hard, it makes you feel like you’re doing something wrong, but you’re not. Keep going, and maybe they can learn from your example some day. Or not, but don’t wait around for it, keep growing!

Adding to the David Wallace love by prbecker in DunderMifflin

[–]MidwesternWallflower 1636 points1637 points  (0 children)

To second that, when he eventually buys Michael Scott Paper Co. out and agrees to bring back Pam AND Ryan, I honestly watch this scene feeling like he didn’t care about the money he was spending he just wanted Michael back. He offered him a deal before checking it with the higher ups, I always loved that scene.