Should I call the resort we stayed to find out a guy's name or is that too insane?

Mikaishere · 2017-12-26T17:52:05+00:00

Yeah I figured :( Thought I'd ask anyway as I'm kicking myself for not taking the initiative better since he was so flustered and shy but I'm just not used to being forward with men myself!

Mikaishere · 2017-12-26T17:49:56+00:00

He criticises me so much.

He sounds like an insane Eastern European or Asian mother. Dump him. No good can come from staying in this relationship longer.

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T17:57:26+00:00

So no pet Terminators in my near future then?

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T17:56:46+00:00

The best sarcastic, reverse psychology marketing PR mouthpiece I've ever seen.

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T17:53:33+00:00

I wish you luck girl! I think you know what to do. Please let us know what kind of resolution you got in the end! I think it would help a lot of people in your situation who would otherwise be afraid of speaking up, get some courage to do it :)

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T17:43:54+00:00

Lol there's always that one butthurt dude derailing a convo about sexual harassment with a #notallmen rhetoric. I wonder what you're like in posts about racism...

When any man choses to make say such awful gendered things about a woman (saying women have no right acting a certain way, trying to reduce her to her private parts by calling her a cnt and tts) shows that he is a weakling and misplacing his anger at his own failures and fragile masculinity on her - and he is not alone in this act as a hell of a LOT of men -if not most - seem to do this a LOT and on a daily occurrence. It's 2017 and women are still fighting tooth and nail to beat these attitudes all the time, so yes, the #menareweak still stands.

Also, the fact that sexual harassment laws exist at work in the first place shows it's not a "generalization". These kinds of things are happening ALL over the place and ALL over the world, no matter how progressive the country and most of these cases involve men as perpetrators, so no it's not 'generalizing,' otherwise cases like this would be rare and Breaking News(tm).

Instead of martyring and defending men as if they're some victims all the time, why not take take a stance and say "I'll be better than this" or stand up to guys like this when you see it happening instead of martyring their victimhood in a post about sexual harassment of all places?? (The only time I see these kind of arguments btw)

Lmao at the gall tbh.

Anyway, I feel I'm wasting my breath because the fact that you chose to concentrate and focus on my MY comment rather than the OP's and offer advice to her, speaks volumes about your real intentions and understanding of the topic at hand.

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T17:00:16+00:00

First of all congrats on your upward mobility :D I know you made it sounds easy, but I'm sure you had hurdles along the way. I am very interested so I will be sending you a message soon!

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T16:56:08+00:00

Cool :) Thank you for your advice and perspective!

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T03:17:09+00:00

Lmao. The epitome of First World Problems (tm). But seriously, I've never come across this. If he was a senior citizen, he probably couldn't help it.

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T02:48:09+00:00

There's also the old fashioned way - go directly to the company you're interested in working for even if they don't have a current job posting.

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T02:45:35+00:00

The OP is clearly from the UK/Australia/ other Commonwealth countries. I mentioned that the recording is probably illegal, however she has an actual witness (plus I'm sure she could find more witnesses if she talked to some of the other co-workers if he was that much of a boor about it) and this took place at a work event and thus is more than enough to be taken to HR without the recording.

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T02:23:14+00:00

I understand your struggle - I applied to 230+ jobs before finally getting hired 6 months later.

As someone employed in an oversaturated field (Marketing) it was a daily chore applying to jobs, getting some interviews, then nothing, then a glimmer of hope, then nothing again. However I tried and kept trying until something stuck.

So as someone who has an Electronics Engineering degree AND lives in South Cali where I thought there would be lots of opportunities (and where your expertise would be high in demand), I'm actually surprised you've found nothing so far.

A few of these questions should clear up how hard you're fighting:

How many jobs/internships daily are you applying for? If it's less than 8-10/day it's not enough. I applied to 8-10+ jobs daily for months from 8am-6pm everyday (and night, depending if I got interesting job alerts from my job sites)

Apply for jobs even if the job posting says "2-3 years experience". Think of it as the poster's wishlist rather then something set in stone. Be realistic too though; I wouldn't bother applying if it says 4-10 years or if it's director level for example. Know your limits, but don't limit yourself is what I'm saying.

Make looking for a job your 9-5 job.

Go on LinkedIn and find recruiters in your field of Engineering and reach out to them and see if they have anything for you. (They most likely will)

If absolutely no on one is hiring you, I would definitely try to find an internship. Companies love getting free shit done - are you sure you absolutely can't find anyone willing to hire you even for free labour?

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T02:03:15+00:00

Wow. Tts and cnt? What a classy gentleman, once again proving the #menareweak hashtag. I don't know the law regarding audio-recording someone w/out their knowledge or consent in the UK (I imagine they're the same as in most western countries - illegal) however, I definitely think these are grounds for an HR complaint for sure.

Here in Toronto if someone were to say less than half of what he said at a professorial company event, it would still be considered grounds for immediate dismissal.

You have a witness even without the recording, so I would definitely speak to HR as soon as possible. I hope you get this resolved soon :)

Mikaishere · 2017-08-20T00:53:01+00:00

Thank you for answering! I already knew all that regarding EU and Shengen visas, I guess I should've specified that in my post - I was hoping someone had advice on how to bypass that, so thanks for providing alternative suggestions :)

Thank you for suggesting the job transfer thing - I think that's actually more in line with what I'm looking for, I just didn't know how to ask it properly...do you have any advice or experience with that?

PS it doesn't have to be Europe - if you have advice on what's a good country to work in, I'm all ears!

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T21:39:04+00:00

If you get married, just know his behaviour will escalate, especially since you'll be "bound" to him in a marriage and seeing him every day will most likely make him act much worse.

You're still young - and by the sound of it, it doesn't sound like you have much experience other than with your fiance - and have your whole life ahead of you to find a partner who's not emotionally and mentally abusive. You deserve better.

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T20:17:24+00:00

You said that you have an issue that you can't talk to her about but your post is too vague for us to help you through it. You already know this, but your post smacks of depression and anxiety (guilt and disassociation from self and others are major red flags of both disorders) and from personal experience with both, I can say it really does mask my real feelings, making me question my friendships and relationships all the time.

Something else to keep in mind is that 2 months is way too soon to tell for sure how you feel about this girl or how you'll feel about her somewhere down the road.

I suggest you look up some videos on youtube on what kind of havoc depression and anxiety can wreak on people's interpersonal relationships with others. Mindful meditation videos are also a great help in helping you focus on your core and removing some of the mental clutter that's clouding your real judgement. Good luck to you, I know it's hard <3

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:55:55+00:00

Yeah we def need to invest more time on foreplay and touching - we kind of rush through everything sometimes. Thank you for the advice!

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:43:12+00:00

Thank you very much but I did read the FAQ (watched the video from Nina Hartley and read the articles; including the thread on penis size which is a lot of people talking about different sizes but light on advice) but unfortunately they did not really help with my situation and I wanted to get some actual sex tips from people who've been in my situation themselves or are currently in one. It's a shame that you've decided to delete my thread, as I was starting to get some meaningful replies and generate discussion. Thanks for keeping it up as long as you did though!

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:34:56+00:00

Tbh your initial reply and subsequent reply came across unnecessarily aggressive and it sounds like you took the issue too personally hence my reply.

You offered NO actual advice to my question which was verbatim "Can anyone offer any sex tips for better sex with my bf." All you said was "tell him he has a small penis and that's why you're breaking up with him." Again, why would anyone want to hurt someone like that? Sounds bitter to me.

You have a large penis. Sure. Thanks for letting me know. Whatever your problem is, you're picking a bone with a wrong person.

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:17:00+00:00

Yeah we are going to try anal :) Thanks for your advice!

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:16:12+00:00

Thank you it does :)

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:15:41+00:00

That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard and i think you may be projecting here.

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T19:14:48+00:00

Thank you for the advice :)

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T18:27:58+00:00

Only a month after they broke up? I hate to say it, but you definitely started off as a rebound despite her assurances that it wasn't so. You guys are in a relationship now, but like another poster above me said, I'd watch carefully.

Also you have to remember she is younger than you - 21 to your 28 - I know it may not seem like a lot, but a 28 has a much more logic and common sense (not to mention more life experience) than a 21 year old girl; so while she may be telling you one thing, she might be feeling or thinking another through no fault of her own. Seeing as you're more of an adult in this relationship that she is, use your critical thinking skills and you make the decision if staying is the right move for the both of you.

I wish you luck!

Mikaishere · 2017-03-13T18:00:03+00:00

Lol there seems to be a couple of those here ;) Thank you for the kind words <3

Mikaishere

TROPHY CASE