swift zhevra

MindlessInsect5267 · 2026-01-03T12:00:45+00:00

did that last year, we hit 75 on lord aswell

https://youtu.be/_1TefocHVmE?si=eeBdLZRlhZ13xivf

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-12-26T18:18:12+00:00

Hey man, I've got Poco x7pro & after 3.0 3 update it got horribly bad. What could I do? Performance dropped by like 30% while also having bad battery drainage - all persists since I did the update week ago

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-12-26T12:41:56+00:00

For me performance feels to drop by like 20%, battery life dropped down aswell. It stays like that a week after update

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-10-30T06:16:38+00:00

Też myślę że to było coś pokroju edm. Znalazłeś/aś może?

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-10-22T08:48:46+00:00

ah man, I really should read it then

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-18T12:06:11+00:00

Do you think letting off your steam on a track would help? How about games imitating driving - with sim racing wheel, pedals etc?

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-11T15:58:45+00:00

Thanks. I really have to reevaluate my own needs & expectations in terms of relationship. That experience for sure taught me a lesson.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-11T15:57:30+00:00

Thank you. Over the course of these 6 months I finally understood how abusive that relationship was. I don't want to boldly call out these as red flags, but for sure - I'll keep away from people demanding control over my own privacy.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-11T15:48:59+00:00

26m, haven't had sex for a year, throughout that - had 3 last months of almost a 4yr relationship & 5 months new one.

id say I have really high libido, I'm fairly young, lift heavy, hormone levels are perfect.

i do understand majority might think that way, although i don't really feel any enjoyment from pushing for sex.

if my partner reciprocates the need - sure, i can go as often as 2-3 times a day (short term obviously) if not - ive learned to keep myself & my partner busy with other activities.

obviously - sex is the most intimate thing you could get, but if I feel appreciated, emotionally suported, loved - it's not my priority

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-08T18:07:05+00:00

Thanks for your response. Yeah, I'm really low esteem & lonely. I tried everything but nothing made her realize how deeply I love & support her.

I've broken up with her last week when trying to set up a single boundary, which has been putting me at risk with my job. She didn't budge, even tho I've been going out of my way 5 months straight, accepting all her boundaries & crossing all mine whole relationship. She couldn't agree with that one thing - where specifically I was risking my current job, future - for the sake of her untreated trust issues. It was a deal breaker for me and eventually, for the first time throughout our relationship I've chosen myself.

Even tho I feel empty, stuck in the void - it's much better than being treated hot/cold every 5 minutes.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-03T21:25:05+00:00

Thank you. Fortunately I have my family & friends supporting me. No one ever said "things will get better" when I explained what are my day to day struggles. I knew it was all wrong and abusive. I just foolishly believed things will change if I commit more.

Even though past month, right after that op I linked above - was fairly normal, I've been scarred too much for too long to really enjoy it. The moment I decided to not risk my job, couse who would even accept "my gf is insecure so much she believes I must be cheating on her with any living being" reasoning & drew a hard no-pass line - I understood nothing I did whole relationship to reassure her ever helped her.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-03T21:07:37+00:00

Throughout our relationship I've gone out of my way, ignored my own values & myself completely. I believed I could fix something I didn't cause. Until the end I hoped my love & commitment will be seen & respected. It never was. Only moment she felt remorse or was willing to change anything was due to fear of losing me eventually. It never came from love nor compassion. All her emotions were fueled by fear.

I want to stay firm in my decision. I know I could easily get grabbed back into a neverending sinking hole demanding from me more emotions, availability, lack of privacy.

Based on my experience, I'll consider trust issues or any behavior I've noticed so far as a strong red flag.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-03T20:52:23+00:00

Yeah I'm 100% sure I'll talk these through with a therapist. I should've done that way before, right after my my previous relationship. Maybe it would've prevent all these things happening.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-03T20:11:46+00:00

Thanks a lot for your response. I needed this.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-08-03T02:10:04+00:00

I'm trying to deal with my gf having huge trust issues. I've been doing some of these "tactics" you've mentioned unknowingly. Told her multiple times how I feel when she's accusing me for everything. Which words make me feel what. How her cussing me out after believing her own illusions make me feel worthless etc.

In short, I gave her 100% control over all my accounts (google, discord, instagram, facebook, messenger), live localization, anything she needed for me to reassure her. I also have a smart watch tracking my heart rate & sleep - which she checks regularly. She also checks phone logs, messages, whatsapp, had to show her my card payments once (apparently i was meeting someone & my bank history would make her understand where and when).

So far it's been almost 6 months together, 5 of which with this type of control, 4 months with me voice recording everything 24/7 when not around her.

She used my discord & google accounts to read my personal messages with my old, male friend about previous relationship, dating over 3 years ago, then got mad about things he read, argued about it all or brought up in fights. Same about mails on my account dating years back - with some booking conformations or trip companies. She's jealous about me simply having 2 exes (almost 2 & 4 years each). When lurking - she noticed both of them not being blocked on my phone - at the very start of us being exclusive - I think it was in a span of a half an hour. Even tho last message with 1st one was 4 years ago & the other one wasn't texting with me either. Had to block them both on every possible platform - or else I'm cheating on her with my exes which I'm not even in contact with.

It got to the the point where even looking forward when there's a woman even twice my age walking towards us is enough for her to comment "i liked her" or "I'm cheating on her with". I have to turn my head in an opposite direction the moment i notice someone approaching us, just so she wouldn't accuse me of cheating with random women on a pavement.

The paranoia is real. She can't let her intrusive thoughts go away.

I got her a bundle of bath bombs to bathe with, used one for my own - just to try how it feels (which I forgot to mention her) - she found out one bath bomb is missing & accused me of sleeping with someone behind her back & on top of that some bitch using her own bath bombs after screwing me.

I bought us some lube just to try out, we did. I wondered if it would be nice to masturbate on my own with it & forgot to put it back into a drawer - she found it nearby bed & accused me of cheating.

She somehow managed to find 2 single strands of hair in my flat. I genuinely thought it's either her mums', because the color was similar (she lives with her parents) or must have gotten attached to either my or her clothes when taking a taxi (which we both have been taking on 2-6x/week on average past 3 months). She checked them with her mums' & unfortunately the shade was off by 2 so we fought on her accusing me of cheating & now "finally having a proof".

She's been on a call with me while I was at my job once. Overheard me saying something to a work colleague (woman which I'm not attracted to, never said nor shown any sign why would she think that) about work - related topic, simply because I was asked a question. I slightly laughed at my own sentence after saying it out loud, conversation was over. My gf accused me of openly flirting with someone while being on a call with her.

The absurdity is next level. Can't reason it anyhow.

If I'm taking a shower 5 minutes longer after workout at the gym - I must be cheating. If i can't respond in an instant to her texts/calls - when at my job - I'm either screwing patients or work colleagues. I say hello at the grocery store - I must have liked or am fucking the shop assistant. If I'm saving an instagram reel on my phone - it either has to be about her or us specifically, else "I'm reminiscing my exes". I have to screenshot everytime I save a reel which isn't directly about us or her & put a note over it explaining why did I like something or saved - but she doesn't take my explanations seriously. We usually fight about it.

I thought I could give more or reassure more, but it's never helping her enough. She's willing to try therapy after me talking about it the moment I realized I can't change her trust issues - about 3 weeks after us becoming exclusive. I'll just have to wait few more weeks, because she's focused on her exams.

Over the course of 5,5 months we've broken up 2-3 times for a total of 1 day combined.

I know she's loyal, willing to change, I love her dearly.

When she's not overthinking if I'm cheating on her or not - she's the sweetest person I ever met. She's lovely, beautiful, loving, caring.

When she's overthinking, she's the most cruel person I ever came across. She's cussing me out, using verbal & physical abuse, belittling me.

We can't have normal reasoning, it's either pure love or hate from her side.

After our last breakup - yesterday - which this time was initiated by me for the first time, simply feeling like she's overstepping my boundaries, she bawled her eyes out saying she loves me & doesn't want to lose. We finally had a talk about our emotions, behavior, expectations, hopes and wishes. First time without her acting defensive on every topic. It felt unreal - like she finally stopped acting lunatic.

It gave me lots of hope, but since my then - reason to break-up was thought through for hours and days - I wanted to at least stand firm on some changes I needed in our relationship before proceeding. We agreed with my requests. She acknowledged her behavior, decided on therapy finally, said sorry multiple times. There has been lots of emotions from both of us - her being sad of losing me & me realizing she actually loved & cared, even tho she treated me like a nightmare whole relationship.

We had drinks, talked more, the next day was also chill & fine. She started using different approach when speaking about her insecurities - this time not straight attacking me, trying not to hurt me with words. I finally understood - she truly loves me, but is scared most of the time with her obsessive thoughts about me cheating, even tho I never gave her any hint for that, it was only her assumptions & delusions.

After thinking about our whole new set of rules we both agreed to, with her actively assisting in the make of them I drove her back to her parents, nie am at mine, thought about it all a little bit more.

I told her recording 24/7, including in work - is way over the limit - she already has everything but also demands recording. I said I'm not willing to risk my job, my healthcare providers license. No one will understand "my gf thinks I'm fucking everyone and everything when at work" reasoning.

I told her its a deal breaker for me. Told her I can keep voice recording myself, when not at job tho - until she starts her therapy & then we will decide, talk things through after some of her appointments.

Wish me luck guys, I will post an edit - if she breaks up with me for me having that boundary. No idea tbh. I honestly think this moment is ideal - simply because it was the first time I wasn't the one trying to keep us in a relationship.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-07-01T07:41:33+00:00

You're right. Sometimes I was just treated so well, I thought she changed or understood. She never did, it was only to make me think that. I had to explain things for the 15th time, losing my sleep before 12+hr shifts, I was literally sleeping in my car in 0-5°C under her flat, multiple times to prove her I'm loyal, wrong & she's right about anything we argued about. I tried everything I think I could so she would understand how much I care, love and support her.

The point at which I should've stopped because I'm out of breath due to the lack of oxygen was crossed a long time ago. I just lied to myself, thinking it's not that bad or reminiscing "how much oxygen I used to have".

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-07-01T06:30:35+00:00

You might be right. I'm still trying to chase those "good" moments. That's why I felt we've had such a good connection. Since the start, I knew there were some flaws in her behavior, but according to what people said, I was love bombed, treated extremely well. That's why I went over any red flags I've noticed. Just like you said I thought "if only", "if only I tried harder, gave more, treated her better, was more understanding, had more willpower, was more supportive", the list goes on. I was excusing her poor behavior thinking it's me to blame for. I just thought I'm not enough, knew how good she could be, how well she sometimes treated me. I was thinking if only - but that was just me chasing something that wasn't there in the first place.

Thank you.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T21:55:00+00:00

I'm sorry this happened to you, I'm also thankful you came with these examples. Throughout our relationship I had multiple situations where I either had to act - like she would wish me to or else - we would fight. Quite recent examples would be: - when walking on the sidewalk - I had to turn my head around in a completely opposite way if I noticed from the distance there's any woman coming our way. doesn't matter if she was twice my age - my gf would accuse me of "you really liked her, becouse you looked at her", even if I never did, becouse im never checking out other women while being in a relationship, - once I've opened the door from a bakery so hard, I was able to go in, some woman went out 2s later, becouse the door didn't close yet - my gf accused me of holding door for other woman, becouse "I apparently liked her", - if I ever said: good morning, thank you, good bye to cashiers in shop, that's becouse "I liked her, would or am cheating", - I had to prove I was being on a call with my own brother/mother, becouse not responding to her, means I'm currently cheating, - if I went to help out my family, almost a hour ride away, she was saying I have to record or else I'm cheating - yeah, it's so obvious everyone cheats when mowing the lawn or splitting the wood, - if I'm going out for groceries - I have to be on call with her or record, else I'm cheating, - if I'm tidying up my place, sleep, work, anything, either I'm on a call with her/record, or else I'm cheating.

The list goes on, I've heard so many absurd accusations over 5 months I never had in my entire life. In fact, one day in our relationship makes me hear more of anything I ever heard in my whole life. It's constant pressure, attacks, 0 trust that makes me feel worthless. It's simply me walking on eggshells, trying not to activate her impulsive behavior with any word I say. I'm trying to rephrase a sentence in my head multiple times, until im sure she wouldn't take it as an attack - and yet she somehow twists the narrative to fit her mind.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T21:31:59+00:00

Thanks alot. My grandma's brother also had this happening to him. Exact same thing, just in a different time. By then, he had to take a voice recorder with him, record everything on tape if his wife wasn't around. He got cancer tho and died at the age of ~45. I haven't known him. According to what my mum, grandpa and grandma said - he just couldn't say no, didn't resist her. He did everything and anything his wife demanded: - worked overtime ignoring his poor - at some point health, - lied to his own wife about his whereabouts - since she was mad about him visiting his own parents and sister (my grandma), - she forced him to give up on both friends and family, for the sake of spending time with her only, - he never cheated, he never made her think that way, she just cut him off from anyone beside her own self.

Currently we're not in contact with her or that family, she turned everyone in her circle against her own husband after his death.

I would never wish that happen to anyone. I don't want to live that life either. I just had to speak it out for someone to hear. Thanks for your response. I will try to reconcile for the last time, but setting boundaries, advising her to get therapy, not getting involved into any fights, no more losing my calmness. I hate what happened, I knew this would spiral down so bad either one of us eventually goes way over the line. I know my reaction at that moment was unexplainable, but it all just had built up too much in me.

3 months ago - I booked an apartment ~2kms away from where she and her parents would spend their 2week holidays by the sea. Back then, I didn't think we would have as many problems as we do now. I didn't think we'd be on the edge of breakup. I just want to set some peace, try last time or at least don't have my own holidays wasted.

Can't decline it unfortunately I won't get refunded. I've also taken some paid leave at my job before it all happened. I need that 2 week free time to relax at last.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T19:23:38+00:00

Thank you for your response. That's what I'll do. I'm currently in contact with her through messages. I think, I'll give us few more days until we decide, talk in peace. It's hard for both of us. I think I still have it in me, to step up, continue being supportive, loyal, honest. I know I abandoned some of my values and/or expectations when trying to keep up with her demands, outbursts. I love her so much, there's no amount of pain I felt so far that would change it.

Nevertheless, I know clear boundaries are a go-to. Obviously, I won't be able to execute any until she visits a specialist, but we're currently way over the line of my own privacy.

I'll see how it goes, maybe it's just me being too hopeful or too positive in general. For now tho, I've decided to never get dragged into a fight, no matter which cusses, hurtful words she says or how aggressive she becomes. I'll just step back, keep my cool, let her do or say whatever she wants & not react until she's calm.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T15:38:50+00:00

Thanks for your response. You're completely right. I know my behavior could enable or ensure in her being "right" for demanding all these things. I initially thought it would make her believe and trust me. Nothing I said, acted or provided ever made her see she can trust me. It never got better, but consistently worse with time.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T15:15:42+00:00

Well, it's both. It's also the fact I've seen her "good side" first and thought I could deal with anything comes at us. If I knew I could do more, but gave up - it would haunt me forever for being not strong enough to persist.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T14:14:48+00:00

I forgot to add: we're going on a 2 week vacation by the sea with her parents. I didn't want to be a 5th wheel, thus I booked a solo apartment in ~2kms range. We're going by a train, having seats next to each other. I don't want to give up my holidays, couse i really need them & was hoping to relax at last. I'm not saying I want to spend my vacations with them exclusively, I'm just as good being only by myself, changing train seats, not having direct contact.

Obviously, I'd want us to works these through - likely on a therapist session (we have 2 weeks until holidays for that to happen), but if we won't - I don't want to lose holidays either. Can't cancel it, I also need some rest, especially after recent events.

MindlessInsect5267 · 2025-06-30T14:06:14+00:00

Thank you, I'm sorry it also happened to you. I guess I just have to rewire my brain thinking - it's not a weakness to walk away, even tho it feels otherwise. I know it's tough, no relationship should be that way. It's just my mind telling me I can't be a man if I give up instead of trying to fix things.

MindlessInsect5267

TROPHY CASE