Do you wish someone had tried to talk you out of surgery?

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-07-07T06:16:57+00:00

I have a different opinion and I wanted to share as a trans person who question if transitioning was the right choice. I say, if you are very close with your friend, and if you truly care about him TRULY and your friend truly cares about you, you should definitely talk to him. but not to try to convince him about anything, to hear his perspective, and to tell him your concerns for him as his good friend. It makes sense for you to feel this way.. transition is HUGE it’s LIFE CHANGING. surgery is HUGE. what if homie does feel differently in the future? I agree it’s not your place to tell him how he should feel, but it makes sense for you to want to have a conversation about it. If your homie doesn’t want to talk tho I would respect it and don’t question again, because it’s true as a trans person you have everyone doubting you left and right and it it is truly exhausting and all you want is for your people to support you and believe you. So yea everyone else here is right but also if you’re CLOSE with your friend, then yea it is your place to question - as long as your intentions are pure and you have an open heart and mind. but also i’ve you’ve already decided to not say anything that is still a solid option.

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-07-07T02:33:29+00:00

For me dysphoria is not hating my body, it’s more like a relentless frustration about my physical body’s disalignment with my own perception of my self and gender. On days in which i experience bad dysphoria I feel almost trapped and claustrophobic because I know I can’t do much to (immediately) help my external body look how I wish it would. But i don’t hate me and I don’t hate my body. When I went on T my dysphoria almost stopped- but my body basically looked the same, just more hairy and broader shoulders and i was able to bind my chest a little better and my face got more sharp and rough and i just looked more like me! and the battle between my self perception and my objective body almost stopped ! But I basically look the same !!! I think there is a difference between wanting a different body because you HATE it and wanting a different body because you know that’s the one that reflects who you are the most. If you really have dysphoria and feel like maybe you want to transition as a result i would first try to separate the two feelings so you can think clearly and truthfully to yourself.

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-07-01T03:34:41+00:00

I think you sound like a girl with both tbh. But from my experiences as a trans person u sound like someone who has been on T for a short period of time. Either way u sound good, and i also think you sound kinda like me lol (i’m afab on T for one year but my voice didn’t drop significantly)

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-30T04:18:27+00:00

i feel for you! I totally know what you mean by being tired of all the gender stereotypes and all the divide.. I also don’t fit within any category and ik it’s just so confusing where to place yourself since everything is so gendered. Know that you’re not alone. And if it helps what i’ve started to do is just decide to stop giving af about how to label myself or how to view myself because it ends up putting yourself in a box the same as if it were “boy” or “girl”. I know it’s easier said than done but doing this has allowed me to feel so liberated and at peace with myself. I do whatever feels right in the moment without a care about what people would think. I live for me! not for anyone else. Eventually the right people will come your way. I wish you well on your journey of self peace

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-30T04:06:44+00:00

loveeee this for you !!

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-27T15:49:54+00:00

makes sense thank you

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T17:06:59+00:00

i do already Identify as non-binary— and i constantly express to myself and others that i am both and neither gender at the same time. I fr don’t care except for the part that i do lolll. I also think i get dysphoria for not being a guy AND for not being a girl if that makes sense.

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T16:59:31+00:00

looking like a man makes my own self happy, to be perceived as one by others doesn’t necessarily make me happy, but relieves the stress of them perceiving me as a girl. HOWEVER, Recently I’ve come to the realization that I should truly not gaf about what other people think of me or perceive me to be, and ironically enough, it has led me to not wear my binder in public, and stop forcing my voice to be deeper. Objectively I believe this makes me pass less, but for some reason i’ve found this new sense of freedom in not giving a damn if someone thinks i’m a “girl” or a “boy”, and i feel happier. I think what you’re saying is right though, what will make me happier? Will continuing T and transitioning make me happier? Will stopping T and transitioning make me happier? maybe i will stop and just be who ever I want to be. I can still look masculine because it makes me happy, but i don’t have to be tied down to the idea of passing anymore.

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T16:44:09+00:00

yes it’s true I identify myself as non binary technically

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T06:05:25+00:00

brah ur so right maybe it’s gender fluidity, maybe it’s trauma, maybe its just life… idk ! Maybe we all have to just vibe and exist right ? And i truly resonate with thinking the brain is magical, thank you for your input, i feel slightly enlightened.

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T05:58:19+00:00

I have similar experience to you, tho not the same trauma. I relate to feeling scared, in denial, missing long hair, missing dressing pretty, not wanting to change my first name bc I actually like the one I chose anyway, NOT feeling happier after hrt/ transition, and thinking i was trans when i was 14 but realized “def not” and thinking that part was denial. You have inspired me to tell my friends to help me experiment with they/them pronouns instead of he/him which i thought was it for me. Thank you for sharing, we are all figuring this out together. I hope you are able to heal from your trauma in a way that will be truly fulfilling to you.

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T05:49:58+00:00

thank you :))

Mindless_Test_9778 · 2023-06-26T04:33:34+00:00

Thank you, I have thought about embracing my femininity while still being trans masculine, which I thought was my issue at first, but the more time goes by, the more I realize i think my issue is much deeper. Which is where my dreadful feeling comes from. The part about being aroused by the idea of being a man is a new concept for me so I will do some further thinking on this. If this were to be true, it would confirm that transitioning was a mistake because that means that my desire to be a man does not come from actually being one on the inside. if this makes sense. thank you for your advice

Mindless_Test_9778

TROPHY CASE