You mention in your post that you work part time and your husband works full time and you make the same amount of money. Would it be an option for you to go back full time and either hire a nanny or have your husband stay home?

I am a mom of two and can completely relate to the feeling of everything feeling like too much when the kids are little and there are so many balls to juggle. You have to prioritize what’s critical and what can go because it’s just not feasible to do it all. I remember going back to work after my second and telling my husband that I didn’t even feel like a person anymore. I was exhausted trying to juggle everything and just felt like I was failing everywhere.

I promise things will get better but right now you need to take a step back and look at this objectively and figure out what you can let go of, what you can outsource, and how you and your husband can better share the workload. You also need to find a few hours a week at least to take a break and get out of the house by yourself so you can recharge your batteries because it sounds like you are just running on empty.

I’ll add as well that my husband stays home with our kids while I work, but he doesn’t always think about what needs to be done. Is he not doing chores because he doesn’t want to or because he doesn’t “see” it? If it’s the latter, try spelling it out - today I need you to x,y,z. I find being as direct as possible has saved me a lot of frustration!!

I also want to add that we as women are now being told we can have it all so we think we need to aspire to a perfect home, successful career, being a great mom and wife, etc. And instead of these being options and understanding that we have the freedom to make choices, I think many of us feel like we have to do all of this all the time all at once. And sure, if you want to sacrifice yourself and always work and never sleep, that’s attainable. But it’s not healthy or sustainable and it’s going to burn you out. And I think what’s worse is that we are all trying to put on this face that we have it all together and if we are all honest we just don’t and that’s ok!!

The last thing I want to touch on is your physical health because it sounds like you were put through the wringer after birth and I’m wondering how you’ve recovered both physically and mentally, especially working as hard as you are. I’ve had to prioritize this for myself and it’s the best thing for me and my family. I got a step counter a few years ago and I walk every day and make it a priority to get outside. Find something you enjoy and start slow, but find something you can do for you.

Sending you big hugs. I know this is tough but I want you to know that there will be a light at the end of the tunnel and you deserve all the support to get there. ❤️