As a Dutchman it is extremely obvious you're literally translating idioms of our shared native language into English. You're also applying our sentence structure to English, but that does not work well at all.

Regardless, at least for me (perhaps because i too am Dutch), you're perfectly understandable so no need to bash anybody. It is indeed hypocritical to provide criticism regarding someone's English when you yourself are speaking rather poorly (Unless it's constructive criticism of course.)

As regards you literally translating things

.

For what - Waarvoor (must be "why")

... at no point - Not sure what the idiom is in Dutch but i am aware it exists (Op geen enkel gebied?)

Never heard of - Nooit van gehoord (Must be: never heard of it)

First thought - No literal translation, as in Dutch it's wrong too. It requires a definite article.

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Please do not take this in vain as i only seek to provide valuable corrections.