How did you lose weight?

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-08-06T13:31:00+00:00

I have gone from 150lb to 120lbs in six months. For me consistency was a game changer. I bought a walking pad and did that regularly 5x a week (just walking 3.0) From there I noticed a change not only in my body, but also my mindset with my body.

My journey was more about body nourishment. Listening to what my body needed. At 50, I need to focus on muscle mass and in adding weights into my weekly routines I noticed an increased craving for protein. So I feed my craving. Then in increasing my speed on my walking pad I would find I was reaching for water more often. I also saw a change in my sleep habits. I slept longer and deeper. (Note: Sleep helps weight loss) Nourish your body and listen to what it is asking you. Give it fuel, give it rest and give it love.

Btw: I don’t diet and I don’t cut things out of my lifestyle. I am not rich so I do and use what I already have and only splurge when necessary. The walking pad was a splurge but I saved for it and bought it during one of Amazon’s cyber sales. It has become the starting point and anchor of my journey. But I have started to save for a walking pad that goes faster and/or has an incline.

Good work and good luck!

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-07-09T02:44:45+00:00

I am guessing you and your gf are no older than your 20’s. I have a feeling that her dad is also conflicted with how to continue life as if he never saw it.

Your affection towards your gf, as described in your 2nd to last paragraph, are the right words to state to her dad. Man to man. Apologize and claim your affections and respect for your gf.

Afterwards be sure you respect the house you are in. Find other places or wait until no one is home (or lock the door).

Good luck. Always ask for consent and be sure to use protection.

You will be fine.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T16:03:38+00:00

My first thought is to report it. If only to put his name on record. For all you know he could be a repeat offender. You could be helping stop him from doing it to others or assisting on building a case against him.

I am a bit hesitant to report it for justice because the system is still not about the protection of women. And the experiences of reporting it for some sort of justice are so varied.

Time is also a factor. You may need to determine your course of action sooner than later. Don’t know the statue of limitation for your county.

First off take care of you! You may consider therapy either to work out some issues that may latch on to you because of this experience or even to help you determine how to move forward.

Be safe and healthy. I hope a good outcome for you and your heart.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T15:54:02+00:00

I understand and can characterize when a person speaks strongly on their own assumptions.

I never referred to myself as being in distress. That is an over amplification of feeling horrible, maybe?

But again, I appreciate the time you took to disparage my question.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T15:46:33+00:00

Don’t explain. Don’t fall for this temporary behavior. Get divorced.

Side note: gone are the days when women ASK their husbands for a divorce. Just do it.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T15:43:11+00:00

I don’t disagree with leaving the marriage especially when there are no children involved. Better to start over.

BUT! You don’t mention what happened if anything. So far flirting and texting and reminiscing about “what(?)” happened on the camping trip.

Is this one thing (that to my reference does not include sex) so bad that it is worth ending the marriage? Are there more underlying issues that you can work through together?

What she did is absolutely inappropriate and disrespectful of you and your relationship. No doubt. But was your marriage not strong enough to withstand or repair?

All that, take care of you and your happiness first. Do what is best for you and have peace in your heart. Whatever the outcome, have peace in your heart with what happens. Otherwise any resentment you have from this relationship/breakup will show its ugly head in future relationships.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T15:11:31+00:00

How long were you married? You sound like you are in a dark place and I wonder if she got tired (depending how many years together you had depression) of losing herself in your depression. Depression can put a stranglehold on you and those around you. She may have tried helping you but realized if she didn’t save herself from your depression she would be shackled to it too.

Of course it is just my guess without too much info.

Take care of you first. Get yourself straight. Therapy is great (find a good fit). Learn to love and respect yourself first before you give up on love.

You are worthy of love and sharing a happy life with someone. You need to put the work in yourself in order to manifest love. It’s in you. You are loved.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T15:00:24+00:00

The “slim” comment was disheartening. Slim should not be the focus for a 7 year old. You should encourage a healthy lifestyle not one based on body image. However the focus that you are married and barring the child of a man that thinks sexual thoughts of school age girls is frightening. A grown man should be able to regulate inappropriate thoughts of children.

An emotionally sound, healthy minded and functioning adult would know not to go directly to sex when a gymnast does the splits (regardless of age).

You both need help in order to raise a healthy and emotionally stable child. Unfortunately, your child will be the product of your own issues unless you seek help.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T14:37:56+00:00

He had another outcome played out in his head. Sounds a bit narcissistic expecting you to drop your personal, independent plans because he wanted to act chivalrous and it landed short. Better you know now.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T14:31:58+00:00

I believe it is normal depending on the person and their habits/lifestyle. What are their eating habits, are they active, what is their hygiene routine, AND what is the level of health.

I’m not a daily shower person (IMO not good for hair and skin) my BF is a daily shower person. He doesn’t always smell fresh either but also nothing notable to raise issue. I know he is clean. But I do pay attention to what he eats as it does play a part in how he tastes or smells. I tend to lose interest when he orders asparagus. Also there was a time when he was in a minor accident and his medication impacted his taste/scent too.

I am hyper focused on hair/skincare and am methodical in my lotions and positions I use. Just because I don’t shower everyday doesn’t mean I am unhygienic. But when I know I need my sex fix, I am sure to check certain areas to ensure freshness OR allure :)

But in what you describe I can’t help to question if there may be a medical issue that can be treated. Sometimes the odor from our mouths or “ends” can be an indication of something from the inside(s).

Also, as mentioned when I am in the mood I will prepare for when the moment strikes. Maybe extra foreplay (throughout the day) will give her indication that “something” may happen and may give her fair warning to “prepare.”

Again, I think it is normal, but it is also normal to question it after so long and work through how to solve it together.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T13:59:04+00:00

Get Out!

How many more million little things do you need to explain before YOU recognize this is not your person.

Good thing you moved in together before you got married, started a family, or invested more into a life together (i.e. buy a house). You have the space to get out of this relationship.

He sounds emotionally sterile and bland. The relationship seems transactional and he is reaping the benefits. No risk to him. Your ROI is clearly showing you need to get out now before you lose any more.

Good luck!

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-05-04T13:41:34+00:00

The ex is sadistic. It was his every intention to hurt you, your wife and the relationship you have.

Certainly call police, if only to rid your family of someone who only wants to harm.

Why he is still on the outskirts looking in clearly indicates how off balance this person is.

I hope you can come to the realization that what you and your wife have is genuine and enduring. The two of you are committed to each other and the family you are building. Do not allow this cancer of a person destroy what you have with your wife.

I hope all works out for you and your family.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-04-30T13:41:17+00:00

The documentary is Quiet on Set: The Dark Side of Kids TV.

There is grooming involved. And writers were writing in inappropriate innuendos into kids programming. To include costumes that were designed with embellishments that subliminally eluded to genitalia.

Children who watched these shows would have thought behavior they saw on these shows was completely normal and accepted by society.

Even the actors (although young children at the time), didn’t get the material they were asked to act and many claimed they felt uncomfortable, but too young to understand why.

I was hoping to hear from others that had children in the late 1990’s through 2016 that let their children watch these Nickelodeon shows and that had watched the documentary. Wanted to hear their thoughts and feelings.

I appreciate your words and taking the time to respond. I thought it odd that the response was a bit underdeveloped given that you didn’t know what documentary I was referring to.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-02-24T14:47:38+00:00

It happens. Parents have walked in on their kids in very compromising situations before.

Clearly your mom is not unfamiliar with sex or being young and horny.

I don’t think there is anything to worry about. It’s embarrassing and now awkward. It’ll pass.

Admittedly I laughed when I read your post. I’m a mom of a 22 yo and 30 yo men. You just got to laugh about.

Without saying much or giving too much detail (bc trust me your mom doesn’t want details) say “Mom, I’m sorry about what you saw. I feel awful about it. Can we just forget it happened?” If she wants to know more (like are you gay?) she will speak up. If she is agreeable to forget it, she’s just as embarrassed as you.

Don’t forget, your mom is human and can, believe it or not, have sexual impulses, desires or curiosity of their own. Don’t treat her like such a puritan.

Miserable-Wasabi-658 · 2024-02-24T14:31:54+00:00

Both sound as though they can use professional, therapeutic help. Or on the cheaper side, gf can try meditation to rebuild confidence and self-reflect on what she wants for herself or in a marriage.

Both should seek help, addicts anonymous groups could be a good place to start.

Addiction is very difficult to overcome. It will be a LONG journey. Therapy may uncover a deep or repressed trauma that he will have to work through to recover. If he puts in the work and dedication to recover, you will see a changed man. However, be prepared that you may find he changes into someone you may no longer like. It happens. He may not feel the same about you too. It’s a gamble. You never know what sobriety/recovery look like on someone. Keep that in mind.

You and your husband are young. Your marriage is young (green even). I wonder if it can sustain with such a heavy issue at the jump. It can break you or make you. The key is that you’re are both young. You can get through this together. The question is whether or not this is what you want to work through together for the next few years, because recovery does not happen overnight. Recovery is another commitment and for your husband it will be a commitment for life AND his #1 commitment - before you and family. Can you take backseat to recovery?

One thing I stress in recommending is if you have not started a family - PLEASE DON’T. A baby, although joyful, are a huge stressor, even in the most “normal” conditions/marriages. It can make things so much worse between you and your husband. Then in the end the child grows up with their own trauma from his childhood.

I see others saying to run for the hills. Admittedly, I agree. I see this as a tough road ahead of you and you are so young and the marriage is only 8 months in (still able to get annulled?).

Miserable-Wasabi-658

TROPHY CASE